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Shoes

astepmom's picture

Going on vacation for a wedding next week! Yea! The BM will only send nasty stinky shoes with holes in the bottom for the skids. We're trying to decide if we should buy shoes for them to keep at our house? Our budget is tight, so I don't want to waste money on something that won't get used much. But I bet they would be really happy if they had something to wear that wasn't nasty.

Comments

stepmom2one's picture

She probably has good shoes at her house. Just sends the nasty ones so the good ones don't get wrecked at BFs. (or she does it to be mean)

We have everything here for SD10 always have. BM sends nice stuff but we prefer to have a pair of sneakers, boots, snow boots, sandals......depending on the weather.

Get your own stuff if you can it is just so much easier....if you don't have a lot of money you better keep them at your house. You'll probably never see them again if they go to BMs.

LotusFlower's picture

Everything I wanted them to have that was nice....I bought for them and it stayed at my house....give them something nice and let them keep it at yur house....it will make them happy...

A mother is not defined by the "b" or the "s" in front of her name, she is defined by how she handles the "mother" part.....

kk's picture

kkrage
MIL and I use to send them home but then 2 weeks later they were back with the rags, SM sold the new stuff in garage sales! I would keep and eye on it, start with sending them back and see what develops.

Nemo's picture

Speaking on shoes...
On christmas when BM dropped SD5 off all she dropped her off in was a dress and some dress shoes..
Which okay, that was fine, because me and SO went and bought her ALOT of new clothes... But we didnt buy shoes. It was snowing...! So the next day, I went to walmart, and got her a pair of $10 tennis shoes. Which she competely adored! They live at SO's house, and I get to see her use them. I think its better if the clothes one parent buys stays at that parents house, and vice versa.
But SO sends her back to BM in her new christmas clothes..
What can ya do?

Abalyn's picture

This is probably a stupid question, but have you told her you are going to a wedding and would like her to send some nice shoes?

I only ask, because after about 2 years of ex and SM being furious with me (unbeknownst to me) that I always sent them to their house in ratty clothes, they finally blew up at me. I explained that the kids get disgusting at daycare (where they picked them up EO friday) and I didn't want to send them in good clothes/shoes. I was happy, however, to send good shoes in a bag. I just didn't know it was a problem until they boiled over.

Anyway, just curious if you had asked and what her response was.

Abalyn's picture

Yeah, that's what I figured. I guess I would just suggest you buy them some decent shoes for your house. Maybe check a secondhand store?

Bradybunchmom's picture

My ex and I both did the whole my clothes stay at my house, his clothes stay at his house when we were exchanging every week. Now that its very rare that they go over there we have to send clothes over there and hope they come back. I try to send them in things I don't love, but that don't look like rags, because I KNOW half of them won't make it back. He doesn't hang on to the things he forgets to send back with me either, he tosses them in the garbage because his new girlfriend "needs room for her stuff". So in my defense, yes I send them in my least favorite clothes, but I know from experience that they will be lost, sent back ruined, or tossed in the garbage.

kidsaplenty's picture

We have had clothes issues. Both kids have complete outfits including shoes/boots/outerwear. We will not have the kids go without because of something they have no control over (parental decisions). Now we do not buy the best out there, nice things from rummage sales or on clearance that are reasonably attractive and servicable.