why can't he stay with BM for a weekend!!!!
ss15 didnt' go home until Monday night when we took him home from his Friday visit. now he's back again. seriously - he just left Monday - we just saw him when we took him and ss17 out for supper last night - I got out of having to bring him home but here he is again. NOT looking forward to going home tonight. why does he have to be there EVERY weekend. How do I politely bring up to DH that I would like time other than during week (starting to invade that now too) without ss15 being there.
i would scream outloud at work i'm so pissed if i could without everyone thinking i've lost my mind!!!!!!!!!!!
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why is he there? doesnt he
why is he there? doesnt he have friends? he should be out with them...is your house better than bm's?
He is grounded at BMs for
He is grounded at BMs for being "inappropriate" with his GF that is no longer with him. He comes to our house because DH is not into having punishments from BM come to our house because she cant' control him and he did nothing wrong while on DH's watch....
His friends are all at bm's area. ss17 drove him to our house and went back to bms because he wanted to spend the weekend with his gf. i could just kick his ass for doing that!!!!
So he's coming over to get
So he's coming over to get out of punishment and your husband is allowing that?
yep - my nickname for him is
yep - my nickname for him is disneyland dad. nothing bad ever happens with him. a reason for my resentment of his kids. they are the reason he is like that and he always will be if they keep playing his emotions on how they have it so bad at bms house.
I got a giggle reading
I got a giggle reading this.
And reading some of these posts recently about SKs and dependency issues, I'm not so sure how many of them will be grown AND gone soon.
god i hope he doesnt stay
god i hope he doesnt stay forever :O
I am glad that ss15 enjoys
I am glad that ss15 enjoys being with his father - but I would like some time with his father without him being there. As everyone knows being with someone for a few hours after a stressful day of work and being with someone for the weekend when there's nothing over your head are completely different. I dont' feel like I fully relax on the weekend because ss15 is there. I want a weekend where it can be like we are kid free - which is my choice as i have never had kids. he's able to be alone - he's old enough but DH feels like he needs to be with him if he's at our house - the hell we do - lets have a date night the 2 of us when we dont' have to bust ass to have a good time and be in bed early so we're not tired for work the next day!!
BMs new hubby is a total tightwad. they dont' spend money - including what DH gives for CS. DH spoils them by taking them out and buying them whatever they want. ss17 has a job and has newly experienced how hard money comes by adn how quickly the gas pump takes it away. ss15 has a few mowing jobs but TELLS DH that he worked hard for his $$ and that DH should pay for whatever he wants because he's his little boy. It takes all i can to not scream at him that he thinks we dont work hard for our $$ he's JUST LIKE HIS MOTHER is what DH says. Well than break the habit and get the kid used to not having everything given to him!!!! I'll be damned if any of my $$ goes to that kid. we have different bank accounts and i refuse to pay when we all go out anymore. I used to pick up the bill as often as i could but too many times did i either not get a thank you or ss15 would watch me pay and then thank his father. screw that.
thank you - i thought i was
thank you - i thought i was losing my mind. It's a houseguest I didn't want. I think it would be better if he cleaned up after himself instead of just leaving everything be. SS17 got a job busing tables and it's amazing the turn around in this kid!! He takes care of things so much better and is appreciative of the things I do for him - if only the ss15 would get a job and learn!!!
because i would like my time
because i would like my time with DH also - kid free. he isnt here to be with his dad - he's here because he doesnt have to do shit here. if i had my way he would do laundry, dishes, clean his room - i dont think this is too much to ask from someone who is 15. im pissed with the lazyness and i dont know how to get him to do anything when dh doesnt make him do anything.
Dont agree that bf is not
Dont agree that bf is not supporting either you or his ex when it comes to discipline and 15 is old enough to stay at home by himself without you having to babysit. You have the right to enforce your expectations within your home. I learned the hard way that I can and need to set my boundaries, if the child is in my home and it does not matter if I am there or not they need to follow my rules as well as their fathers. Yes I am old fashion, back in the 50's it did not matter who it was the bus driver, cook at school etc. if you were doing wrong they had no problem pointing it out and then turning around and telling your parents.
(I'm not all into the idea that it takes a community to raise a child but in this case it fits, BM would appriciate the fact that you are willing to back her up. Wait that is what parents are supposed to do back each other up not just sit back and watch the show)