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who buys the car and pays for insurance

karinbart's picture

Submitted by karinbart on Sun, 05/29/2011 - 10:24pm

OK - need some advice. My 16 year old stepdaughter just got her license and her BM wants to spend 10K on a 2005 car for her. We have my daughter (who is away at college) car sitting in our garage for her to use on the 8 days a month she is here and so we decided not to contribute towards her moms car. Now my SD is upset that she doesn't get to take a car back and forth to and from each house. My husband initially agreed to have her drive the car while here but now is saying she should have one car to drive.

What do other parents of divorce do out there?

Our custody arrangement states 50/50 but the child chooses to spend only 8 days a month here and we pay child support as well.

Comments

sixteensmom's picture

Submitted by sixteensmom on Sun, 05/29/2011 - 10:33pm

Your CS pays for all her needs at the other house. you dont have to contribute to a crazy bm wanting to give a kid a 10k car. Letting her drive the car you have at your house is very kind. Does she have a job to pay for insurance and gas? My kids alll bought their own cars. My step kids were all GIVEN cars, or two, and could never afford the insurance so dh paid that too.

SASX's picture

Submitted by SASX on Mon, 05/30/2011 - 7:20am

The SD gets to pay for her own car and insurance, gas and repairs. With the fun of having a vehicle comes the responsibility of paying for one.

AustMum's picture

Submitted by AustMum on Mon, 05/30/2011 - 7:46am

Eh what is it with parents giving their kids cars?! I had to get a JOB to buy my 1st car & the insurance and maintenance! A lot of my friends got bought cars and didn't look after them but because I had to work hard and save hard for a car and I looked after it very well. ... Kids should have to earn and work for things - just my two cents worth!

doll faced sm's picture

Submitted by doll faced sm on Mon, 05/30/2011 - 12:47pm

Um, I think you mis-read the original post - or perhaps I did. Anyway, the car that they are letting SD use on the 8 days she is there belongs to OP's DD who is away at college. I'm pretty sure the law still does not allow people to give away property that is not theirs. It's the DD's car to keep or give away as she sees fit. Personally, I think she (the DD) is being beyond generous by allowing the SD to use her car while she visits.

karinbart's picture

Submitted by karinbart on Mon, 06/06/2011 - 10:12pm

She did buy the car but taking it to college is too expensive so we are holding it for her. Also, it is a 20 year old car not an expensive newer model. She is letting her sister use the car while she is away. Also, my stepdaughter has had her license for all of a month and already hit a car with her mom's car...now insurance goes up!

I didn't realize there would be such anger here.

NCMilGal's picture

Submitted by NCMilGal on Mon, 05/30/2011 - 8:12am

After the netbook debacle (BM essentially demanded we buy SD-then-almost-14 one for Christmas 2009, we decided she deserved it, SD has been banned from it since May 2010) we refuse to contribute money toward anything we do not directly control.

Cell phone? Nope.
Car/insurance/license fees? Nope.

If we had custody, it would be a completely different matter, but we don't.

PrivateTalk's picture

Submitted by PrivateTalk on Mon, 05/30/2011 - 11:32am

When I was younge I was told to get a part time job and then saved up to buy my own car, once I did that my parents both helped with insurance until I was 18 then it was all on me. Giving a 16 year old child a car may seem cool at the time but in the long run it teaches her that the really big things will just get handed to her, she will also care for the car better if she was made to earn it. and no 16 year old needs a 10K car that's crazy....

If you must go with the parents buying the car I think all parents should choose the price they are comforable with and then have the daughter pay for insurance herself but 10K is really a bad idea she is a beginner driver get a begginer car Smile

hope I helped Smile

CaptainD's picture

Submitted by CaptainD on Mon, 05/30/2011 - 1:49pm

In our situation, my dh's father (ss's gpa) bought him a car for $3000. We pay insurance, and ss pays for all his gas money. The minute insurance goes up, ss will be paying insurance as well. So far, so good.

Milomom's picture

Submitted by Milomom on Mon, 05/30/2011 - 7:56pm

I agree with HelpMeee, StepAside and Rags (and anyone else above that feels that a car for ANY 16 yr old is a WANT, not a NEED).

caregiver1127's picture

Submitted by caregiver1127 on Fri, 06/03/2011 - 1:56pm

My SS wanted a car and we told him that he needed to get a job and save for a car - as everyone has said a car is a want not a need. Of course BM bought him a car (she of coursed used the stocks she was supposed to give DH in the divorce and forgot to give them to him so here again we paid for his car and she gets the credit) because she is never home out having a good time and does not want to drive SS anywhere so that is why a car was bought. SS told us he needed a car to get a job well he has had a car since August and still does not have a job and told me the other week that he will never get a job because his mother says he does not have to. We also refuse to pay for insurance because he won't work -

I say if BM wants to buy her a car let her that is her choice - that is an awful lot for a 2005 car and if SD16 wrecks it that is money down the drain and I would also not let her take the car to BM's it is your DD's car and needs to stay at your home. PEROID - the girl wants a car let her buy one.