I wouldnt mind him being there, unless my vagina was clearly visible for everyone in the room to see. So if he was just sitting there, giving her moral support for these long hours, and he didnt peek down there, i think its ok that he was there.

Where was SD's husband/boyfriend at the time?

At the hospital sure absolutely - in the room - yuck!

Umm - gross-!!!!! TMI to the dad-!!!!! who probably doesn't want to see that anyway, just trying to please a crazy SD in labor-!

Oh Come on. Just because he was in the room, doesn't mean he was in the driver's seat watching EVERYTHING unfold.

I wouldn't want my dad in the room with me. However, I don't find it creepy ordirty if someone else has their dad in the room.

I love my dad dearly, & quite honestly, don't know that there has ever been a better father.

That said, I wouldn't DREAM of asking him to watch me deliver a baby. I was raised to be modest, & with that came the idea that my dad doesn't see any part of me that any other man doesn't see. In my opinion, the birth of a child is something to be shared between a mother, a father, & the new baby.

I was with my sister when she had her first child, only because her husband wasn't able to get there on time. Had he been there, I'd have taken a seat in the waiting room.

Who cares? Having a parent (either parent) there with you when you give birth can be a great comfort. I don't think there is anything wrong with a father being present at the birth of a grandchild if that is what both want.

Dang, people just lack boundaries...girls today lack boundaries, especially those from divorced homes.

You know-i'm very in love w/my bf....but the whole lack of boundaries sometimes just makes me never want to marry. WTF is wrong w/these girls?? And is it them or is it how dads raise them??? I also find it almost emotionally incestuos.

I have never met a dad as straight and moral and with strong boundaries as my father. NEVER did he do anything to make me uncomfortable EVER!! And I was a daddys girl, closer to him then mom-mom was close to my brothers.

BUT-CLEAR boundary lines, we'd go places together, and he was affectionate when I was younger, but as I grew and before I hit puberty there was defined line. Less affection but not starved for it. I did not sit in his lap, or want to sleep in his bed, or want to shave his back, on and on...I would cover up if around him at the beach or pool out of respect. I never saw him even walking around in his undies after a certain age. He'll give me hugs a kiss on the cheek, the man has taught me what proper boundaries and father/daughter relationships should be. And he is my rock no doubt.

Who would even DREAM of having their dad there during delivery?? My dad came AFTER I had the baby...my mom was there while I was in labor but left come delivery time.

IFL-have to say this but your stepmom was right...and i know your dad and you are close but sorry...definately some blurred boundary lines between you and dad. From outside looking in...just sayin'-quite clear. He rejected the boys to do guy stuff w/you? Wow

Even though I was very close to my dad-he ALWAYS did guy things w/my brothers and bonded.

I understand it's not sexual, but it is a private, intimate moment. Some people like more people in the room, that's fine...a DAD there is creepy, don't care who thinks it's normal. I doubt in any tribal nations or less industrialized countries this is even acceptable. I know a lot of times there are a lot of midwives, sisters, aunts, mom, etc....but it's normally a woman thing.

it's only recently that our men/husbands/partners started participating in the event. To be perfeclty honest I know plenty that would prefer to have skipped it entirely-and I'm fine w/them feelign that way. But your dad, seriously???

Chewing with your mouth open isn't sexual, but that doesn't make it appropriate.

I'll betcha that DH wanted to be there for SD at CONCEPTION as well knowing these weirdo guilty dads with no sense of adult/child boundaries!!

I would not have wanted my own dad at my birth.
It does not mean this was a sexual or gross thing though. Sounds like the daughter has had an off and on relationship with dad and this may be her attempt to reconnect at a "deeper level" no pun intended ;). Maybe dad would have rather not been there but did not want to lose this chance to reconnect. Who knows, so many details and nuances that we are unaware of.
When my father was dying, and I went back to my country to be there for him and my mom, I was home alone with him for part of the time. He got up to go to the bathroom, his kidneys failing him, he stumbled and fell and his PJs were down. I had to pick him up and clean him and lift his frail body like that of a child's and bring him back to bed. It was very hard to do that and see my strong dad in that way. Sure, it was gross too.
I know this is a very different situation, but when our bodies go through such extremes, there is very little sexual about it, if anything at all. Maybe its just two people's attempt to reconnect in a way that, while it is disturbing to us, did not mean any harm.
I don't blame you for being uncomfortable with this either, though.

Grandpa is supposed to be there to take the kid FISHING, not to watch the kid pop out of his daughter's hoo hoo.

Simple as that.

OK, I have a very good friend that had a "home birth" in a little pool. Sick :sick: (to me). She invited her entire family to attend. Including her dad, and her 15 year old (at the time) little brother. And they were all there. She shows the video to anyone and everyone that is will to watch, and had my kids over one day and asked if she could show them... ummmmmm NO WAY IN HELL. But I love her dearly. She is just a hippy, and I don't think her dad was "all up in her kool-aid" when she was pushing the kid out. If you know what I mean.

Me personally... my dad was there alll day and in my room every minute with the exception of when I was getting checked, and when I started pushing. He stood outside the door.

I think it really just depends on the people. I don't think my friend lacks "boundaries" because in her family, that kind of stuff is the norm. They are just different.

SFF-aging is different then childbirth. TOTALLY different.

Seems the way of nature-our kids wiped our asses when we were newborns and a lot of times we end up wiping theirs when they get old lol.

BUT-a young healthy adult/and relatively young father...what reason is there to be in eachothers private physical space.

I honestly say this is all about lack of boundaries.

My dad was there. Both of my parents were there... and I've had few babies.
My dad left the room when they "checked" me (what fun!) and his "spot" was up by my head. He didn't want to see my hoo-ha anymore than I wanted him seeing it!
Back when I and my siblings were born, we were all C sections and the Dad had to wait outside. He'd never seen a baby coming into this world. Neither had my mom (she was totally knocked out back in the day.)

I don't think you're being a jealous bitch, but I DO think you and BF just have a different perspective on this. And that's ok.

I hope that tricky comes back and wasn’t scared off by MishL’s first and very hostile response. MishL watch your tongue or at least bite it when you feel the urge to say/write something hateful. If you haven’t got input of any real value best advice is to stay out.

I know, as others have also said, that some folks want their whole family present during a birth, usually these births are done at home with the assistance of a midwife and it is a bonding experience for the entire family. It’s not my cup of tea but I have no problem with others engaging this practice. To me the bonding experience should occur among mother, father and baby.

But in this situation, it seems that the entire family wasn’t present. Where was the father of the new baby? Were his mother and father also invited to attend the birth to signify that it was inclusive event for the entire family or was it just another opportunity to rub certain noses in SD’s shit of who is in and who is out? Why is the birth of a child seen as more important to the mother than the father?

Is this “gramps going to the birth” an up and coming trend among the semi romantic father/daughter set? No wonder these girl’s marriages fall apart. They are emotionally married to their dads and it must be very emasculating for their husbands. Shame on all dads who refuse to wean their daughters thus damaging them just to keep them bound to themselves for life.

In my opinion is if the main person there was dad, then it is indeed very creepy. No, you aren’t jealous you are feeling normal anger that anyone would feel when continuously shoved to the side as an unwanted intruder.

Not sure about yall, but I would have let the janitor take a look at the hoohoo if I thought he could have gotten the baby out quicker.

I guess I just don’t’ see the big deal in this. I did have c-sections , but I don’t’ think that it would have bothered me for my dad to see his gkids born. Which I doubt he would have watched it, but he would have defiantly been up by my head for moral support.

I find it repulsive...I can't ever imagine my father being with me while I was giving birth...my mom, yes...my husband, yes...and heck, my mom didn't even look much...lol...but my dad? That's just another disgusting daughter of divorce crap...they are truly sick...truly sick...

WHAT?!!!I agree... pretty repulsive. The only people that belong in the delivery room are the PARENTS of the baby being delivered in my opinion!!! My MIL once told me she wants to be in the room when I give birth one day. HAHA in her dreams!!!!!!!!! Even my own Mother understands why I only want my husband in the room.

This will be one of those things to agree to dis agree about. Some are ok with it and some are VERY against it.

I can't understand why some of you are getting a bit angry though? lol

Willow, let me put it this way. The reason many are angry is because it's a reminder of the very blurred relationships and boundaries they experience daily between fathers/daughters. THAT's the outrage, and they are ENTIRELY CORRECT!

ehhhh. I just don't think this would be one of those things to get outraged about. But if it floats the boat...more power to ya.

Edit to add. More power to ya...mean a collective you, not just overit. lol

It sounded funny when I wrote it, but mean when I looked at it.

My spouse has had a strained relation with his girl over the period. She has banging gaps where she decided not to move see him fathers day facebook status.