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I thought I wanted this

young_step_mom's picture

When I met DH, he and BM has NOTHING in writing and BM had DH's balls on her mantle. Slowly he started realizing her empty threats were just that -empty. He began to see how manipulative she was and stopped letting her run the show. Finally, after BM refused to hand over SS because I came w him to the pick-up, he went to see a mediator and they agreed on custody and CS.

Well things were better for a bit but slowly and surely they started having problems again. It all finally exploded on sunday when DH was supposed to take SS home but didn't. SS has been sick w a fever for close to 10 days and he was supposed to go see the dr today. Well it was POURING and SS looked really down and pale and had''t eaten well all day plus his temperature was rising so DH called BM to ask if he could keep SS and take him home the next morning. BM refused to DH said ok just let the rain calm down and I will take him.

Well it just got later and later and it was raining harder and harder so DH called and said you know what, I don't want to risk it so SS is staying w me. BM called and called for at least an hour, the came to pound on my door for another hour and finally gave up. DH saw her at the dr today and said she told him he couldn't get SS for his overnight this weekend because he had kept him an extra night but that he could come sunday afternoon and keep him just the afternoon.

Well DH went to speak to a lawyer earlier to get all of this straightened out before a judge. I have wanted this for two years, and I have been pushing for a court ordered agreement forever, so why aren't I happy???

I guess I just feel like there is so much drama to come and it's gonna get ugly and in the end things will still be the same. I guess I have just lost the will to fight and I am all out of hope.

Comments

newmom01's picture

Well I have been a member here for a while and BM was that way to my DH too! But When our two sons came along 18 months and 5 months, they ss's stop coming over so much! Thank goodness...no more extra days and taking them to school on monday when they were suppose to go home on sunday .....

But I have a question, it is not that I dont want my DH to be a good dad, but Im happier that the ss's are at our home less, its not that they are bad, but they DEMAND thier dads attention the whole time and they are noisy! I already have two small babies that CANT help themselves, but they know not to scream and yell loud for no reason. They are more respectful than they use to be years ago 9 & 8 years old now.

But question is although my DH and BM have a custody agreement in place if DH dont want/cant get them HE DONT GET THEM! No matter what the paper says BM just gets mad and holds them for a few weeks then when she gets tired of them she will hand them over so she can go party or whatever she does..... We did not get them over the summer either cause me and DH were not about to move our daily routine around and then have to pay a babysiter or daycare...

So why is it that some of your DH's just wont say no! If he dont follow the order letter per letter what can BM do besides get mad? and thats a serious question' what can she legally do? If any DH wants to be a butt hole and never sees his kids on a regular basis but when his time does roll around again she is suppose to release them right? no matter how many times he didnt pick them up..... (my DH does not do this)

but I just would like to know. We still get them every other weekend, but DH just not let them stay till 9 or 10pm or over night on sunday anymore they go home at 3pm or 5 at the latest. he he dont pick them up on friday (do to work scheduale) he gets them early saturday mornin, because Im NOT picking them up with two babies to feed and change and then have to cook something for them and keep them entertained!

Oi Vey's picture

Your DH was wrong for keeping SS when he should have been returned to his mother. Sad I woulda been pi$$ed, too.