i want to smack BM
So after sending numberous texts to BM about her being a dead eat not giving money. She's finally decided to send some money here and there. She texted me the other asking for my bacnk account # so she drop money into my account. I told her that I don't feel comfortable giving her my.info>> she's been.screwing uncle Sam and public aid system.for.years.so I don't trust her. I told that she can send.money without using my account. Now she's saying that I have been asking for help and wont give her a way for her to give us .money. she is such a crazy bitch. Leaving me disrespectful and ghetto ass messages. Saying "I'm just trying to help u guys. I know u need it" -- yes we do bitch I'm tired of.spending my money on your kids. Then she says shes leaving town..???? I hate this bitch and I'm tired of dealing with his baby mama drama
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Has she not been turned in
Has she not been turned in for nonpayment of CS? My FH had to go after BM for her to pay CS. He still had access to her social security number which I believe was what helped them find her a lot faster and garnish her wages.
There is no court order,
There is no court order, custody or child support. My SO has been raising his boys for 8 years without her. She is a seasonal parent= one week a year. I've started to ask her for.money because im tired of being broke because I'm paying for her responsibilities. She does no parenting whatsever so I told her she needs to send money.
Wow...That's sad. Why is
Wow...That's sad. Why is there no order of support in place?
On paper, is she unfit to be
On paper, is she unfit to be a parent? Unless she is a known drug addict, or is abusive, if she is taken to court, she can screw things up for you and your SKs. She could suddenly "want" custody, and because she is a mother, and (I'm assuming) she makes less money than you and your husband, she will get the kids and your money. Tell her to send the money through Western Union, that's really not a big deal. And if you REALLY need the money, just pick it up and be over with it.
You can just have her send
You can just have her send you a check via online Bill Pay. Or set up a Paypal acct and she can put money in that account and you use it like a visa....There is no need to give her your account info.
Go to court. Get a CO and
Go to court. Get a CO and initiate direct payroll or welfare withholding. That way the CSE office will get your account info and not BM. They direct deposit to your accounts and BM has no access.
We did this with DickHead so that the CSE office keeps real time records on any arrears.
What we also did was open an ING (internet bank) account for CSE direce deposits and immediately auto transferred the money to other accouns so that the ING acct always had a ZERO balance. That way if the CSE office screwed up they could not take money out of our account and had to call us directly if they overpaid or otherwise screwed up.
We never had a problem with the CSE office over paying but when dealing with the usual Gov't ineptitude we decided that we could not be too careful.
My point is..... get her in the CS system and let them hound her for the money she owes.
Good luck.
Unfortunately SO doesn't want
Unfortunately SO doesn't want to go to court,take ant legal.action. his reason is that he doesn't want anything from her if she can't be a mother to her kids. I've told him that if she was the one with the boys she would be hounding his ass for cs. She's not unfit to be a parent as she has two other kids with her man now.she basically choose to leave her kids with SO so she could live her life. I think that if we took legal action --custody,court,cs....I do believe that she would then want to have custody so she doesn't have to pay child.support. its a messy situation. Theey weren't married and he has been the only parent in their lives for 8 years. He may not want to go he legal way but I will make this bitch pay for her responsibilities. There is no way I'm spending one penny on stuff for her kids when she has a job and can afford to give her kids money for food,clothes.
1. You need to make him
1. You need to make him understand that this money is not for HIM, it is for the children. Visitation and support are two separate issues. Even if she never exercises visitation, she STILL has a legal obligation to support her children.
2. I highly doubt if any court in the WORLD would give custody of children to someone who has not been a regular part of their lives and disrupt the environment that they've been in for the last 8 YEARS.
3. He needs to realize that his choice in the matter is affecting YOU. YOU are being forced to pony up for ANOTHER WOMAN'S CHILDREN since he doesn't feel like making her accountable. You may not think it is a big deal right now, but someday you may become very resentful over this matter and it may adversely affect your marriage.
I think the majority of the
I think the majority of the time its stupid "pride" on the man's part.
To them, accepting CS from the biomom is saying that he isnt man enough to provide financially for his kids. Its like a handout to them. Instead of seein it for how it really is, that these women are just as financially responsible for their frickin kids!