I worry about the "wishing the days away" thing too. My SS16 and my oldest daughter are in the same grade at school. While with him I've got a count down going (18 months until his 18th bday, 2 years and 2 months until HS graduation), but I don't want to think about my daughter being finished with HS that soon! I want to savor all of her HS drama fun and all the firsts - dates, proms, etc...

Tough situation for sure.

Regarding the whining - is anyone (dad??) trying to change her behavior?

I feel for you!!!!I went through a tough time accepting SD and her habits (playing princess and attention seeking), too.
But the clue was SO who really really worked hard to a) make her understand that she can't always be the centre of the universe (which was tough because that was exactly how she was treated before we met) and b) give me security and safety in my role as his spouse (which was also tough since SD believed clearly that she and I were equal).
Don't get me wrong, he is still very loving and affectionate towards his little girl, but less Disney driven.
So, lately I find myself feeling more and more driven towards SD, since she is less of a thread and the roles in our family are better balanced- I even sometimes find her rather cute but it can be such a roller coaster of emotions.
My question for you is- what does SO do to get your SD to drop her silly whinging habits and what does he for you to make you feel loved and secure?
Did you guys read step monster yet?