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Ugh

just.his.wife's picture

Submitted by just.his.wife on Thu, 05/24/2012 - 10:17pm

I hate my life.

Last day of school was today. 24/7 with DH's kids for 3 damn months.

On the bright side, they have to get up at 5am tomorrow morning. They are serving breakfast at the soup kitchen. Community service hours begin.

DH's attorney is filing for a CO and CS modification and child support due to a substantial and emergent change in circumstances. Mother has 2 Restraining orders preventing her from contact with the children for the next year. (I know I posted PO earlier, but what was issued is a restraining order, not sure if there is an actual difference or if it is just verbage)

Attorney read the orders the way they read is the first RO ends when her case for contributing to the delinquency of minor x 4 is over. So when she is sentenced/ pleads out etc- it does not extend thru the 'punishment' phase. The Restraining order I was given prohibits her from any contact for a full year. Based off the wording of the document she literally can not even call the schools to see if they are attending, what their grades are, etc.

She has called DH twice on his cell phone. He let her calls go to voice mail- she did not leave a message either time. Attorney wants us to bring the cell phone records to court to prove she is still breaking the RO as she is attempting to contact someone related to me by marriage (my husband, no brainer but on a bet she cries and tells the judge again that she 'didn't know' and gets away with it.) No idea how long this will take, supposedly the papers will be filed next week then it is wait on an "emergency" court date.

Back to hating my life: how is it SHE breaks the law, and I am stuck playing jailer and dealing with her damn kids?

Comments

ThatGirl's picture

Submitted by ThatGirl on Fri, 05/25/2012 - 9:22am

Any way of getting them enrolled in some sort of camp or summer school? How about sending them to a relative for part of summer? Anything to not be stuck with them the entire time!

Delilah's picture

Submitted by Delilah on Fri, 05/25/2012 - 9:41am

Yeah got to agree with this ^^^^^^^^

While it must be extremely difficult to have to deal with mother who acts in this manner and not make the wrong choices in life i.e. letting her into your house. Ultimately what your skids did was WRONG and hell would freeze over before I forgot that.

I am glad to hear you have RO against BM, and I would remind your attorney that BM pled ignorance of the details of the orders previously, when she broke it by making contact over and over again. So when she attempts the SAME trick this time PLEASE get your attorney to point this out and the fact that she continues to do this and seems to be getting away with it!

Ha! I had to laugh when you mentioned you have made civil claims. I really dont blame you. This isnt about being a bitch, this about F*cking boundaries and she keeps leaping over them. This is part of the consequence to that.

I hope your skids have an awful summer I really do, I was so shocked to hear they permitted their mother to do that. No matter how warped BM is, they knew that was wrong and if they didnt then I would be on count down until they reach 18 where they would be out on the welcome mat on my front door. Oh and I would be making that crystal clear to my DH and said skid.

If someone takes liberties to THAT degree, then there is no second chances in my book, and I dont care if they are *only* 17. Old enough to know better, old enough to reap the consequences. Tough lesson in life but one which will your skid will find is applied to most situations in life.

imthewife's picture

Submitted by imthewife on Fri, 05/25/2012 - 9:34am

I agree with ThatGirl...this is really DH's deal and not yours.

I know they will be at your house, and like most of us, you end up feeling the responsibility...however, DH needs to find some activities for them to be involved in that HE can take them to.

It is not in the SM handbook that we are a replacement nor are we a "phew...I got out of that one" scapegoat for DHs who think we are automatically going to step in and sweep up their messes.

My DH got the short end of the stick with his kid in his situation, but he did not get to dump SD on me all he wanted. It was at MY discretion.

Good luck! I hate summer, too...especially with a whining SD who is 19 and thinks she knows it all!

just.his.wife's picture

Submitted by just.his.wife on Sun, 05/27/2012 - 10:27am

omg. I think I would be willing to pay for that out of my own pocket!

THANK YOU wonderful idea!

LRP75's picture

Submitted by LRP75 on Sat, 06/09/2012 - 7:30am

I learned a valuable lesson when I was trying to build a case of stalking against an ex-boyfriend:

I used to just let his calls go to voicemail and then his number would be in my "missed calls" log, but that wasn't good enough. I had to actually answer the phone and immediately hang up so that the call would show up on my phone bill as a "received call." I was then able to print out a phone bill (I have AT&T) to show to the police. The detective took one look at that and immediately stepped in to handle the situation.

Perhaps it would be advantageous if your DH did the same thing when she calls? Make the most out of her stupidity.