Yeah I agree that's not too mean. You're a parent, not a short-order cook. They'll figure it out once they get hungry enough. If they are still hungry at bedtime, offer a bedtime snack...of whatever they wouldn't eat at dinner.

No, not too harsh for a 3 and 4 yr old, provided you didnt scream it at them. My son is three and the rule is that if he doesn't eat his meal, then no snacks until the next meal.

But I also don't push him too hard with all new foods. I try to only offer one new food at a time and make sure that there is other things of the plate that I know he likes. It usually takes him 3-4 times of trying a food for him to accept it fully. I start with you need to try one bite and slowly I increase my expectation. And if there is something he genuinely doesn't like, I respect that. But he is also a REALLY good and healthy eater so its not ever a big battle.

When I got DSD she was barely 4, and she ate nothing but McDonalds nuggets and fries or KFC chicken and ice cream or cake rolls. Now I am a very picky eater, so I try to be reasonable. The rule was if it is something you have ate and "liked okay enough" before, then you eat what I cook or you don't eat and do not get a desert/treat/snack that night (except left overs). If it was something new or that she only tried once before and didn't care much for, she had to eat two bites of it. If it was absolutely horrid to her, I would not make her eat that item again. So she did feel like she had some power too. Today, she eats just about ANYTHING and is willing to try about anything once, but she feels secure and confident to be able to say NO and be able to not eat something that really disgusts her (lima beans for example). Otherwise, I cannot think of anything else she doesn't eat these days. I did not want her turning out as bad of an eater as an adult as ME.

At that age, I would try to do that of one or two bites required (I mean, really I would sit at the table for two hours rather than take a bite of enchilada, personally too) and if they try it and just can't eat it, then maybe they get a peanut butter sandwich but NOT chicken nuggets and NOT* something they choose like they think the kitchen table is a restaurant. It has to be something that is a suck-it-up-and-eat-it alternative that is not all yippie for them.

So, in brief, no you were not mean, but I think giving them a little feeling of control where they can say no to something they really don't like would be good. I remember my mother telling me I ate what she made or not at all, so I didnt eat dinner for three or four days. Hah

When we were kids and we refused food, my Mom said "Fine. This is dinner time. If you get hungry later, you'll have to wait until breakfast tomorrow to eat again." So because of us behaving like whiny brats, we went hungry until the next day.

As a result, I can assure you my sisters, brother and I did not grow up to be serial killers, we don't go around kicking puppies and kittens and the last time I checked we've all managed to stay out of prison. }:)

You are not mean. You are teaching your kids that the world doesn't revolve around them.

I have to agree that I'm not "all that" about enchiladas. It's the sauce. Ick.

But basically I do believe kids should at least try what is put in front of them once. And unless they have a serious medical condition, they are not going to starve and blow away before the next meal.

I will share that my parents always made me eat swiss steak -- you know, the stuff that's hammered to a pulp and then baked smothered in cream of mushroom soup? Well, I didn't like it. Didn't like the texture of it, and also didn't like it because every time I ate it, I threw up. My parents were convinced I was making myself throw up just to spite them and get out of eating it.

Turns out.... I'm allergic to mushrooms. I eat anything with mushrooms and it's like instant food poisoning. If I go to a Japanese steak house where they prepare the food on/at the table, mine has to be prepared separately. Can't even have my food cooking on the same cook top as something with mushrooms.

Not too mean at all. When they figure out what HUNGRY feels like, they will eat what you put in front of them.

Provided is wasn't something most kids would find disgusting like sauerkraut or salmon patties [I don't see enchiladas being gross to too many people.] then no you're not being mean at all. You're being a good parent. Babying them now will just lead to entitlement later on. I do the same thing with SDs and if they truly don't like it I will make them hot dogs or PB&J.