I am so very lost about what i can, or even should, do..
This was the XW weekend to have the kids and so my DH and I went riding our ATV's. When just got back and were in the middle of washing them when SD9 and SS6 walked up the lawn to us. We were both a bit surprised to see them.
DH: hey guys! what ya doing here?
SD9: Hey dad! We walked here from grandmas!
Me:You... walked? Where is grandma?
SD9: At home.
DH: Well then where is Grandpa?
SD9: at home.
Me: So who did you walk with?? :?
SD9: I walked here with SS6.
:jawdrop: Yeah... They walked to our house from 3 miles away, across 5, very busy, 40 mile an hour roads...
So we called their grandma who apparently they were supposed to be with. She doesn't answer. So DH texts XW, She doesn't answer. The kids have been gone for a 1.5 hours (according to the time SD9 said they left Grandmas), Missing from their grandparents and no one knows where the hell these kids are or have been?!? And how is it that they are missing, and no one has called their dad? WTF. We eventually got a hold of XW and She came and picked them up, but I'm just floored by this whole thing. I didn't want to give the kids back to her, but what can ya do?
**Back story**
XW and DH have been divorced for 4.5 years. She is a very controlling woman and she has full custody of the kids. He has "visitation" every other weekend and twice a week. (which has realistically turned into every weekend and 3 times a week. This was a weekend that she 'wanted' them and they ended up at their grandmas.) DH also took all their debt in the divorce so that she would "allow" him to see the kids. ALSO she doesn't work, and he pays her 2500$ a month(500$ Per kid and 1500 Alimoney)... I love this idiot dearly. But he got raped in the divorce. He is a very timid, gentle man, who doesn't like to cause problems so he just gives... and gives...well, until he met me }:) Oh! the kicker too? XW has gone back to school, and as if she didn't see her kids enough, now her mother (Who is in the 3rd bout with cancer) is watching them for her on the days we don't have them. The kids informed us today that they haven't seen their mother in 2 weeks. ... 2 WEEKS?!?
I just needed to vent because realistically "I" can't do a damn thing. 
- Trying Mama's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
Next time have them hang out
Next time have them hang out at your house and see if you get called. }:)
Oh man hindsight that is
Oh man hindsight that is exactly what we wanted to do! and SHOULD have done.
I would just let them stay
I would just let them stay and then go back to court to renegotiate payment. Who pays alimony anymore - this is 2012!!!
Clearly the GM is too sick to take care of them. Use that in your court visit!!
She is the kind of woman who
She is the kind of woman who would call the police on us for not handing them back over. And with her having full custody, we wouldn't have a leg to stand on. We've been documenting her lack of concern and safety for these kids for about 2 years now. We're hoping someone somewhere can point us in the direction of getting the XW help. She needs counseling. Badly. And some parenting classes.I'm hoping that we find a way to have it Court Ordered for her. We don't want her to loose her kids, just learn to be responsible and know that she is being held accountable for her actions.
I was talking to a friend
I was talking to a friend last night about this, and she said "What if you were still gone?? Those kids could have been roaming the streets for 3 hours by themselves!" I hadn't even thought of that!! We had seriously only been home maybe 15 min!
I would have made a report to
I would have made a report to CPS. That was an incredibly dangerous situation for your skids to be in & there is really no excuse for such a lack of supervision. It might be different if gma & gpa lived two houses down, but as far as they WALKED in heavy traffic?! No way.
If i made a report to DCFS,
If i made a report to DCFS, what kids of result is that going to have for DH? Could that be an opening to get her into counseling or would it blow up hugely in our faces?