You are here

Can't have an opinion

Britmum's picture

Submitted by Britmum on Mon, 04/06/2020 - 3:54pm

Forums: 
Adult Stepchildren

I just need to rant about how us step parents can never have an opinion without DH being defensive and saying that it is only because it's the skids that we feel like that! 

No, dick head, I feel like this because they are wrong and I would have the same opinion no matter who it was.

So actually I am going to turn it around and say to DH and skids that you only feel like this because it's me with the opinion, because if anyone else in the world told you that 25yr SS is being a selfish prick for blatantly ignoring the social distancing rules and putting everyone at risk t(especially you DH)then you would have to agree. I mean the government don't even know your self centered son and they are the ones who made the fucking rules about social distancing, but obviously I only have my opinion because it's your darling son!! 

Total self centered, entitled, nasty knobjockeys! 

Thanks for the rant 

Merry's picture

Submitted by Merry on Mon, 04/06/2020 - 4:04pm

If a neighbor says the sky is blue, then the sky is blue. If I say the sky is blue, then maybe it's sorta blue but it's really more pink right now, or flat out, no it's purple.

It's exhausting.

Fortunately for me I've reached a point with DH that I can tell him in very plain language that he's being a dickhead and he'll stop the skid worship. That's probably just to shut me up, but whatever. It works and we go on.

 

Britmum's picture

Submitted by Britmum on Tue, 04/07/2020 - 9:46am

Even if it was to just shut me up, I would take it and maybe throw in the odd "I told you so" every now and then just for good measure lol

ITB2012's picture

Submitted by ITB2012 on Mon, 04/06/2020 - 4:54pm

...you want to have an opinion that you aren't totally happy? About the skids? About things that affect you? About the place where you live? You're funny!

Britmum's picture

Submitted by Britmum on Tue, 04/07/2020 - 9:38am

I know lol, god forbid I would actually be independent enough to have a say in my own life 

piegirl's picture

Submitted by piegirl on Mon, 04/06/2020 - 6:00pm

No, dick head, I feel like this because they are wrong and I would have the same opinion no matter who it was.

Love it!! Exactly how I feel about the steps myself! Hope you feel better after the vent - sounds like a grade A jerk for risking everyone's health grrrr

Britmum's picture

Submitted by Britmum on Tue, 04/07/2020 - 9:39am

Haha yes I feel better for the rant, at least the steam has stopped blowing out of my ears for now 

Kes's picture

Submitted by Kes on Tue, 04/07/2020 - 12:23am

I can identify!  My DH can say stuff about my daughters that is sometimes negative and I will often agree with him, depending on the subject, but woe betide me if I criticise his daughters.  

Britmum's picture

Submitted by Britmum on Tue, 04/07/2020 - 9:44am

They are clearly too insecure about their own children to take any criticism. It always amazes me how if they really thought that we really are wicked evil people then why have they sold themself short to have a relationship with us. Bloody fools!

Harry's picture

Submitted by Harry on Tue, 04/07/2020 - 10:37am

They feel that thay screwed up there kids.  Most likely they did.  Now they can't face the fact, They made a unlikeable not functioning kid.  So they protected that non functioning kid by saying it's all your Faulk, for not liking his kid ,you don't lovvvve his kid to pieces.  
It's not his or BM the queen faults.  It's your problem for not seeing the good. Your not a real parent.  You just pay for having them in your life  

Cover1W's picture

Submitted by Cover1W on Tue, 04/07/2020 - 2:49pm

I get it.  I'm currently STILL po'd at DH from last night.  In which he cooked a really good dinner, but one YSD14 would refuse to eat (of course, he doesn't think about this, just assumes she'll eat it...riiiiiiight DH).  I don't say a word.

Then it's done, I hear him talkig with YSD about it - she's putting on the crying act.  He sounds irritated, but by the time they come into the living area, he's all joking with her about food likes/dislikes and how funny it all is.  NOTHING about the actual freaking issue!  I'm fuming.  But keep my mouth shut. 

Then he goes into the kitchen and STARTS ANOTHER MEAL FOR HER.  It's almost 7:30 at this point.  I look at him, like WTF are you doing?!  Like she can't cook for herself?!  Then he says, "What?  You can eat if you want to but I'd like to 'eat together like a family'."  REALLY?!  Ok, so I get myself a bowl of chips and start chowing down.  How long now to our dinner DH?  30 min? 8:00?  Because of one person?

Oh, so he can get irritated with me for not eating something he makes for dinner that only he and YSD like, and how I'm selfish for not wanting to sit down when I'm all sweaty from my workout (which he knows is a regular thing) rather than wait for 15 min for dinner (but she's hungry!) or get mad at me for making something different. - so DH how is it I'M being treated  like the child here.  Anyway, all that's going through my head.  I make peas for everone, but eat most of them myself (eff them) finish my meal quick and ask DH, "May I be excused from the table please?"  YSD says, "No, you may not."  I look daggers at her, say "I'm NOT asking YOU, DH, may I be excused?"  He knows I'm furious.

But I cannot talk or I'm going to lose it.  And not with YSD in the house.  He said something and I said, "I'm furious, yes, but not for THAT reason, for a reason you refuse to see or understand.  So I get to come to terms with the fact that YOU CANNOT HELP ME with this issue at all and I need to figure out how to deal with that."  And leave the room.

He knew I was still mad this morning.  So I went for my run to cool off.  Yes, I am pretty well disengaged from YSD and parenting, but I like to cook.  So I cook and provide some good food (no special things) for them.  Well, that is 100% over and done how.  No more Cover help at all.  100% out out out. 

This has become a hotel for YSD.

He ever told her last night, after all this went down, that he's "Really thinks 'you' (SD) deserve to not do anything this week at all but read your book and relax, it's spring break!"  WTF for the third time!  She's been on A BREAK FOR TWO WEEKS ALREADY.  She does nothing to help unless it's demanded and specifically outlined for her - because why should she?  So yes, I've not been touching any dishes or dirty counters, pots/pans, anything. 

After work tonight, I'm going to stay in my office and hang out here and do my own reading.