OMG on facebook I joined a Stepmom group
I am part of a few stepmom facebook groups, and someone mentioned that they notice a LOT of mutual friends with BM in the members list. I went to check and SAME!!!!! So many of the members show up and a mutual we have in common I KNOW are friends with BM. I have BM blocked, so BM herself COULD be on those pages (she's a stepmom as well) but unless someone screen shots my posts and shows them to her, I know she wont see them.... but is it petty of me to HOPE that some of my posts make their way to her? maybe... do I care if those hopes are petty? no, not at all...
Of course I wouldn't post anything FALSE, or exaggerating, but they blunt and straight to the point.... sometimes they are reminiscent of the easier days, some of them are me bragging on my kids, but some of them are "omg, i can't belive SD did this" or "SD is turning out to be a master manipulator, evil, Drama causing B*tch, just like her mom"
So if BM sees them, oh well, what is she gonna do? It's just the truth... if she doesn't like it, then she shouldn't have raised her that way.... and now your friends know the truth about her
Me too
Im on a few stepparenting groups, some of which are "with non bios" as well as general ones.
I sometimes worry that SD's or BM might look me up here or online, but Ive made certain that Ive 1. blocked all 7 of her profiles and 2. any "friends" that we have in common are not on the groups list of friends.
Honestly - I get more help and responses here. And also - the FB ones seem to attract a lot of trolls, and "contrarians" who seem to enjoy just disagreeing.
But I stay there and help where I can.
I feel pretty safe on ST,
I feel pretty safe on ST, though I do still delete old blogs out of an abundance of caution as BM is also a step. I would be too nervous to post something on FB. Our BM would use any scrap of information that that could be twisted for bullying us in court so we have learned to always be cautious even if we're speaking only the truth...
we have occasionally got some good dirt on her for court through social media tho....
yes, I don't care enough to
yes, I don't care enough to get any dirt on BM, we are almost DONE with court orders (SD is 17 and going to graduate next year). DH is convinced that SD wont even come and visit once she is able to start driving, She'll be 18 in March, but hasn't even BEGAN driving.
When a Skid ages out from
When a Skid ages out from under a CO it is a very liberating milestone. Regardless of which side of the blended family continuum you are on.
My DW was the CP and even for us it was a huge decompression milestone when we no longer had to have anything to do with, speak with them about, or even recognize the existance of the SpermClan.
SS launched, is doing great, and sadly had to write off the SpermClan as being detrimental to his life, happiness, and emotional health.
In our case SS embraced normal, stable, success focused adulthood rather than continuing to splash in the toxic multi generational shallow and polluted SpermClan failure focused gene pool.
Honestly, even in private
Honestly, even in private groups, facebook is too "identifiable" for me. Gads.. you even see mutual connections on there. Honestly, that's like setting your picnic up beside the unlocked bear enclosure.
You said in your last post you were enjoying the peace... I would honestly not be in a semi public and identifiable forum posting any dirt on anyone.. friend, family or foe.
Here is a reasonably safe place to vent. no more personal info is on here than people choose to post. no names. no pictures etc.. personally, I would not feel comfortable with the facebook exposure.
I have very much been
I have very much been enjoying the peace, and that is what my posts there have been about as well, I know she'd be able to identify me if she saw my posts, but as I said, its most just factual statements, and not too much feelings, I let it all out here, but there it's more "SD did X, and I know it hurt DH, how do i help him cope." so it's not talking crap, but if BM's friends had seen it, and shared it with her, I don't think she could "DO" anything about it, but maybe feel embarrassed about people knowing the truth about how BM and SD act.
I have been a member of a
I have been a member of a number of SParenting communities over the years. Most have folded. I have also stuck a toe in a few of the intellectually questionable child/womb donor worshipping communities. This is a highly entertaining activity because they tend to lose their shit when the preeminence of Kid-dom and BM-hood is assaulted with questions about behavior rather than the idolization of their mere existence as spawn and incubators. Which at the base level is all many are.
There are also similar though far more rare groups that worship the golden staff of fertility wielded by SpermDonors. I have even less use for these self delusional numb nuts.
Meh, I have little regard for either side of the worship mere existence posses in the blended family world. Or any other world for that matter.
OMG, I have joined a group
OMG, I have joined a group before, years ago, It's name was something to do with "Bonus Moms" OMG all the posts were about "our child this" and "our child that", and I can't believe BM told "our child" this, and I was like WTF did I just walk into?
Just be careful. That is
Just be careful. That is playing with fire and courts don't like seeing that we talk bad about BM or our Skids in court. Even if they are all horrible people.
what I post here is more
what I post here is more unfiltered, what I post there is more "SD/BM did X, and it hurt DH so much, he feels abandoned/attacked, how do I help him feel better?" that way it is not "talking bad about" and more looking for advice, and IF BM or her friends see it, and learn the truth about how they act, oh well, I wasn't "talking bad about" anyone.
but I did originally join the group not REALIZING that BM's buddies were in there, and I haven't really posted much in there since i found that out.
I think I was on the actual
I think I was on the actual Stalk page that was set up at one point, but that was way back in the day and I deleted that Fakebook account. I understand where you are coming from, I have posted stuff over the years in direct relation to Spawn or Meth Mouth and have made it public so they could see it if they happened to troll my page. I ended up deleting everything off my page a few yeas ago because I was just tired of Fakebook. Posting on here I know if Spawn or Meth Mouth found it they could probably easily identify themselves...which I wouldn't mind if they did.