It has been awhile. But Mommy Dearest (BM) continues to rear her head and continues to go after DH for more support money - per our lawyer, DH complied and began paying an increase in his support payments for SD (17 soon to be 18 in September) due to his increase in salary.  It was quiet for a few months.  DH thought the increase in monthly support must have placated BM.  I told him, the holidays are right around the corner - she will have her lawyer reach out just before Christmas demanding retroactive support for 3 years.  And low and behold, December 19th, our lawyer called DH.  Narcassists are very predictable.

For those who don't know the back end of this saga, here is the short version - DH and BM never married, had two children:  SD 17 and SS would have been 23 but passed away due to an overdose last January.  SD lived with BM, SS lived with DH and I.  BM never worked and got a doctor to sign off on disability papers after the separation which was 8+ years ago.  Separation agreement stated that DH's support for SD would be reduced because DH signed over the car, the house, took on all of the debt and walked away with his clothes only just to get out of the situation and so that his daughter (SD) had a home to grow up in.  Fast forward 7+ years and SD will be turning 18 in September, and will not be attending school full time or at all, meaning that support will end.  BM realizes this and decides to go after DH for more and as much as she can.  BM is a classic narcassist and we have had many issues with her over the years, but since the passing of SS, she has become unhinged and began harrassing DH without any reason.  He eventually had to cut off communication with her.  This infuriated her even more and she swore she would "ruin" him.  Note that DH never missed a support payment, was always on time, and paid her directly per the agreement.  She could have reached out at any time to request a change in support and but did not until this past July. First by email from herself which was not responded to because of her harrassment and then a few months later by her lawyer with a threatening email to DH requesting notices of assessments for 3 years, threatening retroactive support for 7 years, that his paycheques would be garnished, that he would have to pay her legal fees. 

Our lawyer determined that DH would have to begin increasing his support payments due to his salary change which DH did.  Crickets for another 2 months.  Until December 19th, last night.  She still wants retroactive for 3 years - this is for the difference in support payments - totalling $10K.  And here's the worst demand of all:  she now wants DH to pay for 3 months of support from back in 2018 when SS, 17 at the time, left our home and moved in with her for 3 months (Oct-Dec) because he did not want abide by basic house rules (no drugs - his addiction was becoming worse at that time, go to school, curfew).  At that the time stated that we didn't have to pay support for him due to the fact that he was 17 and left of his own accord.  Having said that, because SS was in BM's care/home at the end of that year, she was able to claim him on her income tax and received a sum of $5K for him and kept it all.  DH did not bother going after her for any of it. Not worth the fight.  This demand doesn't have any merit.  But it goes to show the lengths she will go to get more money from DH.  Disgusting.

Unfortunately, our lawyer has advised that to fight any of this in court would be costly and more than likely she would win the 3 year retro anyway.  Therefore our lawyer has advised that offer BM $5K lump sum with a stipulation that when SD turns 18 that support payments will stop unless she is enrolled in a full time education program - which we all know, as unfortunate as it is to say this, she won't as she is only attending part time - 2 classes a day - and doesn't event attend school regularly - she is very far behind in even graduating high school (BM is ok with her "taking her time" and has told her that when she turns 18 she can do what she wants). Knowing BM, I predict she will either a) accept the $5K just to get some cash in her pocket (we all know the $ doesn't go towards SD); or b) she will not accept it and go for the for the full $10K but that will take some time to get.  In order to pay BM off, for lack of a better term but it is quite appropo in this instance as DH feels like he is being extorted, we have to dip into the education savings fund that we had saved for SD which is also unfortunate.

And on top of all this, our bank account has been wiped by a scammer/hacker not even two days prior to all of this.  It is under investigation and our account won't be credited back for 7-10 business days.  Merry effin' Christmas.