BM and Adult SD School Enrollment Saga - no end in sight :(
Update to Post under General Discussion: SD's School Enroolment Saga Continues under General Discussion
DH got a new lawyer that sent off a letter to BM stating that the letter the school provided was not sufficient evidence of SD(18)'s enrollment and attendance in a full time program (especially considering that the letter provided from the school was completely false information), that the onus was on BM to provide this proper information. That she was to also provide SD's consent to obtain school records from the school when requested, that DH would like monthly attendance records and report card after each semester. And that should BM commence with going to court to try and have DH's wages garnished, that she would be paying for DH's legal costs.
I knew that when BM received the letter that should would completely, literally, lose her mind. And I'm not saying that facetiously. She is extremely volatile and if things don't go her way...
BM's lawyer sent a response today. And to say that this lawyer used scare/bullying tactics is an understatement. He stated that DH did not support SD's education at all so that he could get out of paying CS; that SD has many medical issues that she is working on getting better; that these medical issues if SD is not able to get better would make her unable to be self sufficient and that DH would have to pay CS indefinitely. That SD is 18 and does not have to give consent for her parents to access her school records.
His response is so much like BM that it's almost laughable.
1) That DH doesn't support SD's education so he can get out of paying child support - give me a break! He has always encouraged SD to finish school, to at least graduate high school at the very least.
2) The letter from the school is false and BM knows this - she obviously did not tell her lawyer that she lied and somehow had the school lie and both got caught. Letter stated that SD was attending full time studies since Oct 4. Which she was not. DH contacted the school and they confirmed that her "program" had not yet been developed. He also contacted the Principal who confirmed that SD was "now" enrolled. SD told me, without any prompting at all, that she was to start going to school this past Monday and that she was only taking two courses. Also, don't want to provide consent for DH to be able to access school records? SD hasn't completed a year of school since grade 8. DH doesn't want to pay CS for an adult child who isn't going to school espcially based on her history. And is DH supposed to just keep paying CS just because SD or BM say that SD is going to school? I don't think so. Oh she missed her first day of school this monday! The first day!!! And SD told me out of the blue that she is only taking two courses. Not sure how that constitutes a full time program?
3) SD's many medical issues - that's news to us! We have not documentation at all showing that SD has medical issues that would stop her from being self sufficient. BM (and now SD) claims that SD can only work part time due to her back issues. SD has told me (again with no prompting) she's supposed to go to physiotherapy for her back but that she has no interest in doing that. So there goes the BM's lawyer's statement that SD is working on getting herself better. Unless he means that she smokes copious amounts of weed everyday to make herself feel better??? SD also had mentioned that she would probably be going on disability and work part time. Way to go BM - let the cycle continue (BM is also on disability but seems to be able to garden, take the dog for walks, take weekend trips to friends places, renovate parts of their house, etc...she obviously knows a doctor who will sign off on bull$&*t). If SD goes on disability, how come DH still has to pay CS? Honestly, I'm not surprised that she is going to try to go the not being self sufficient route as an alternative way to continue getting money out of DH. But I'm pretty sure the onus will still be on her and SD to provide proof of this. And if that does turn into the case, then I hope that DH can have a second opinion.
Our lawyer responded that the school letter was not sufficient and that onus is on BM to provide the sufficient proof and until that occurs then DH will not be paying CS. Our lawyer also feels that based on the letter from BM's lawyer, that they may move forward with the process of trying to get DH's wages garnished. So we are going to have to prepare to go to court now. Unbelievable - never had to go to court in all these years and now we are more than likely going to have to go there? She said she was going to ruin DH's life and I guess she's keeping to her word on that. What a hateful, hateful piece of garbage she is.
Do not cave to her shit. Rip out their throats.
No records of medical issues for this kid's entire life and suddenly she has debilitating conditions that will keep her from being self sufficient? Pardon me while I gag.
No quarter. Go full ass baring, proving perjury, fraud, etc, etc, etc.. and make sure your attorney is an absolute flesh tearing pit bull that will leave BM, SD, and their idiot lawyer simpering in a puddle of ectoplasm in court.
Take it all into court. Every alphabet and keyboard character of information. Subpoena the school,have your attorney issue a summons to the Principal to testify, have your attorney demand a hair drug test of the kid to show her pothead status. Demand the names and contact information for every Doctor and medical professional that SD supposedly has seen since her birth. Every one. Put every one of them on the stand and bare BM's ass. Make sure that SD in in the court room for every second of any hearing and hears mommy get her ass put through the ringer. Besides, SD is 18 and none of this should have anything at all to do with BM so make sure your attorney demands a statement from BM's iidiot lawyer of who the attorney represents.
This was the first thing that my brilliant then teen bride did to bare idiot SpermClan ass. When they sued for custody of my then 15-ish month old not yet SS my FDW noticed that the SpermIdiot's signature on the paperwork was not his signature or handwriting. SpermGrandHag had forged her idiot son's signature. Then FDW took out supplemental school loans, got a lawyer, and went to war. The first thing then FDW did was inform her attorney that the signature on the law suit was a forgery. Her attorney demanded that the SpermClan attorney confirm who his client was and notified the bottom feeder idiot SpermClan attorney that the signature was not the SpermIdiot's. That attorney then immediately fired the SpermClan as clients. Their next bottom feeder moron lawyer refiled the custody suit with the SpermIdiot's signature rather than the SpermGrandHag's forgery of her idiot spawn's signature. DW married a few days before the custody case went to trial. DW handed them their asses. Full physical and legal custody was upheld for DW, CS went up a whopping $23/mo from $110 to $133. Spermidiot had to sit and hang his head all day as his ass was put through the wringer by a long series of witnesses including LEOs, etc, etc, etc who testified to his idiocy,his long arrest record, serial statutory rape career, etc, etc, etc... was rolled out and consolidated in the public record for his mommy and everyone else to see. Any time they slithered out from under their slime covered rock at the bottom of their shallow and polluted gene pool DW smacked them in the face with rolled up copies of the CO, the supplemental county rules, and state regulations. 9 years later the second court action delivered similarly to the first though CS went up by 700%. Tolerate no bullshit. BM is forcing the court action, hand her her own ass on a platter.
Be meticulous, be focused, be assertive, and when necessary, be brutal. No quarter. BM threatened to destroy DH's; life.
Make her rue the day that thought entered her pea sized brain. Make SD see mommy get ground up and spit out via every legal, social, and financial tool at your disposal. This likely will be one of the last significant lessons that DH can deliver for his DD. Far more likely than her launching and having a life of performance and quality is that she will continue to suckle at BM's noxious udder and follow mommy into the gutter. IMHO that has to happen with zero access to your marital resources. Defend your SO, your marriage, and your life from both BM and SD. SD is 18. Time to hold her and BM accountable.
IMHO of course.
Good luck.
Your BM sounds particularly
Your BM sounds particularly putrid. My SO's brother's BM tried the disability/perpetual child support route and failed. This all started when the SD was about 17 and the BM saw her gravy train ending. Fight tooth and nail for proof that SD is incapacitated. There had better be proof of some physical defect. Consider hiring a PI to take pics of her exercising or doing some type of physical activity for fun (if the girl isn't so lazy all she does is smoke weed and play video games.) Anyone can say their back hurts and some people do have chronic pain conditions, but i'm not buying it here. It sucks that your DH bred with this ball and chain of a parasite.
You can request information from the schools
The top administrator on DD is responsible for school records, including enrollment status and attendance. It is crucial to ensure that the administrator provides accurate information, as lying could lead to legal consequences.
Request the school district to provide a comprehensive medical record of the stepdaughter, including the names of doctors, conditions, treatments, and the dates of the first visit.
Consult with an attorney to understand your legal obligations if the stepdaughter becomes disabled. This may vary depending on the state. If the stepdaughter becomes disabled, she should apply for Social Security disability benefits and explore the process with the Social Security Administration.
Wait, this is the BM who
Wait, this is the BM who tried to get retroactive child support on an adult, after that adult had died of an overdose, right? Be sure to bring up her past POS money grabs.
Once a money grabbing person
BM seems to be a money-hungry person. I wonder if she’s been making up stories before. Why would she stop now that she’s an adult? If DH was once fooled by the horse and pony show, why not keep trying? We should cut off all financial support to SD.SD is an adult, so we shouldn’t be conservative with BM. We don’t need to answer or look at her texts or emails. Unless there’s something in the CO regarding money, like college or medical insurance. 1
There is a law in all states
There is a law in all states that child support can be life long IF child is unable to self support due to disability. Child can receive disability PLUS child support. Child can also have money in trust and still receive disability and child support. Its an unfortunate numbers on paper game.
Now MY understanding is 1 parent must live with the disabled child. Some bm's are slick and are NOT living inside the home with the adult child. . JS
Also, bm can request extended cs beyond your states emancipation age IF skid goes to college or trade school. This request for extended cs MUST occur before emancipation age. For the longest time courts did not entertain this request. Now it seems that many states will.