So it's been a while since I've posted. I also delete my previous posts so just a quick recap for context. 
SD10 and SS12 have been changed to coming to ours every second weekend which has been such a relief for both DH and myself, and for them too. We have moved so that was the main reason but DH is also FIFO so we can't have them more than 50/50.

BM has been crowned one of the worst on this site so she is the thorn in our side for the last 9 years. She has successfully PAS'd SD but not so much SS12. His behaviour and attitude has been not so bad lately which has been a breath of fresh air. But, SD is back to her games of lying, sneaky and manipulative. It's a shame because she was such a sweet girl before she was heavily influenced by BM. 

Anyway a blow up happened. The skids arrived at our house and SD had full blown headlice. Sigh. So we treated her hair and long story short she lied and said she didn't know she had it and we stupidly believed her. From history where we battled SD headlice in the past (8 months straight due to BM never treating it at hers) I honestly thought those days were behind us. 

I was pretty upset she lied, especially when we have small children in the house and one of them attend pre school. Plus I am 34 weeks pregnant and don't want headlice in the house with a newborn coming. SS came clean and told us the truth that he actually had them first and BM treated his hair and SD's but for some reason she still managed to have it. SD still tried to protect BM and lie but realised she couldn't anymore as SS confessed everything, So DH did the parenting on that and she hated being accountable for it.  And of course we get absolutely no communication about this from BM because she's a toxic POS. 

Then SD10 tried to wear mascara and makeup to school. I asked DH did he approve of her wearing it and he said No and to take it all off. She of course looked like she was about to cry and stomped back up stairs. I pulled out all her cosmetics she had in her school bag and explained if she wants to wear it on the weekend (as she apparently wears it at BMs all the time). Fine. But we draw a line when it comes to wearing it to school. 

DH again had to parent her on that and explain our house rules again! She honestly thinks we are the worst parents but we are actually normal. it's just she lives with a BM that has 0 parenting and an uncle that doesn't parent her but spoils her instead. So that's why she thinks at 10 she can do what she wants. 

She also has a phone with 0 parenting controls that she doesn't bring to our house as we monitor it here. She's on Snapchat, TikTok (well apparently she's not anymore after a parent reported her at her school for sending her child inappropriate content), and she shops on Temu herself too.

Well BM hit the fan when SD came back to hers. DH got the usual bullshit email from BM alienating SD and refusing her to come back to ours as she is being emotionally abused by yours truly and apparently I have mental health issues. DH didn't reply and said well we will wait it out and see when she comes back. There is no court order - just an agreed child support payment plan in place. So when BM keeps SD (Never SS she's very happy still sending him here and he has no issues here) DH states he doesn't agree to CS and she doesn't get anymore $ out of him. So she ends up giving SD back eventually just always on her terms.. and it seems SD terms too now. 

Well yesterday I noticed SD deleted me and DH from her Snapchat as we can only see her public profile. Which is all rubbish. She wants to be famous and have lots of followers and thrives on strangers playing her stupid repost snaps. I got the shits and reported her profile this morning claiming she is 10 and not over 18. I hope it works and Snapchat shuts her profile page down. After her sending a boy from her school threatening to cut her wrists after the suicidal content she followed on TikTok she doesn't need any social media. 
 

DH spoke to BM and apparently BM was going to take her to see someone she can talk to and of course that never happened. So DH made an appointment with a GP for a referral to a child psychologist. SD and BM don't know it yet but he said I have to do something. I totally agree. He's going to pull her out of school on his Friday they are supposed to come here and take her to the appointment. 

BM Is going to lose her mind when she finds out but she had her chance and now DH turn. SD is convinced we are emotionally abusing her, so this is him helping her and finding a way to get her mentally well to be able to come to ours again. Its just so stressful, I hate Narcissistic mothers who PAS their children, for the sake of their own insecurities. Toxic awful people. I'm protecting DD4, DS1 and now baby on the way from this as much as I can. 

Oh and DD4 cried and got so upset when SD doesn't come here because she doesn't understand why the older sister she loves doesn't come over sometimes. It's just so sad that BM loves that too.