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What do you think a good cp does/should do?

Anon2009's picture

Submitted by Anon2009 on Fri, 10/18/2013 - 9:09am

Bad CPs are discussed here often. As a former ncp sm and now cp sm, I think a good co does/should:

-not bash ncp dad/sm to kids
-doesn't interfere with phone time/visitation unless there's an emergency
-works
-uses cs on the kids
-includes ncp in all major decisions

Comments

Anne Boleyn's picture

Submitted by Anne Boleyn on Fri, 10/18/2013 - 9:14am

- understands that they have an equal role in the financial support of the kids
- takes responsibility and doesn't blame the ex for everything that goes wrong
- respects physical and virtual boundaries (contact is limited to reasonable amount and times)

not2sureimsaneanymore's picture

Submitted by not2sureimsanea... on Fri, 10/18/2013 - 9:19am

This and

-not feel they are entitled to special treatment just because they had kids with you.
-not bad mouth the other parent.
-parent their kids (but this goes for cp and ncp and anyone who has kids.)

SMof2Girls's picture

Submitted by SMof2Girls on Fri, 10/18/2013 - 9:22am

-reasonably share information with the NCP regarding kids' schedules/events/activities/school
-adhere to the CO, but remain flexible for one-off situations
-encourage a relationship between kids and NCP .. or, at a minimum, do not interfere

BSgoinon's picture

Submitted by BSgoinon on Fri, 10/18/2013 - 9:30am

We are the CP. I feel like we do a good job:

Communicating activities and events with BM

Keeping our thoughts/ feelings regarding BM out of SS's ears

Supporting BM and her families relationship with SS

We don't get child support, but have never asked for it. She doesn't work...

Supporting SS financially, and taking responsibility for any fees accrued by events we enrolled him for

Offering BM ROFR even though it isn't court ordered

Providing SS with a phone so he can communicate with BM when he is home

Addressing adult situations WITH THE ADULT and not using SS to send messages

Anon2009's picture

Submitted by Anon2009 on Fri, 10/18/2013 - 10:50am

"Keeping our thoughts/ feelings regarding BM out of SS's ears

Supporting BM and her families relationship with SS"

Yes, I especially agree with these two. Both CPs and NCPs should do these things- we do and did. Sadly, bm didn't Sad