Are you sure that your BDs are his?? Cause hot damn, he sure acts like they belong to the mailman and SD is the second coming of Christ.

I would be pissed as hell about this. I hate double standard crap.

WTF File for divorce, seek as much alimony and CS as possible and let him see how little money he'll have left to spend on SD when he's sending half his check to you every month! Bastard!!!

Have you guys tried counseling?

You have every right to be mad. iPhone 5 for a half birthday? WTF is that? Did you ask him what he planned on getting your BDs for their half birthday?

Now if it was me I would look at him as serious as can be and just say "why is it okay to get an iPhone5 for SD but you dont even acknowledge BD's half birthday."

Does he not see nor care the damage he could be (or is in the process of doing) to SD?

On a side note, I couldnt live a life like this and would be filing for divorce.

(((HUGS)))

I hate the double standard and I can't for the life of me understand it! My DH stressed continually that when we had our children that he didn't want anything to change for the steps so my babysitter has always worked around my schedule....so she is there even when he is off so that he and sk can still do whatever they want....funny how he never worries about his relationship with our bios...he always says well SS will be gone in a few years so then I can focus on them.....he just doesn't get it

dear sweet jesus....W.....T....H.....????....guess my DH owes me a lot of back half birthday presents.... }:)

Just another excuse to spoil his princess. Someone should tell him that she's not 4 years old.

the part that scares me, is that it seems to me like his spoiling of SD and sneaking around have escalated since she has been an adult and moved out! Like seriously, is there no end to this madness???

The only time I have ever heard anyone making a fuss over half birthdays is when the actual birthday falls on Christmas Day or conflicts with another major holiday/birthday. And then, it's treated as the only one. It's not as if they get TWO birthdays that year. So, that's weird.

Why would you allow your children to be hurt by such a double standard? You do realize by accepting it & allowing the double standard to continue - you condone it.

Treating our children as if they are somehow less...deal breaker for me.

I have heard of people using 1/2 birthdays as a way of getting free stuff while on a disney vacation. I had no idea people engaged in such craziness in their day to day lives. :sick:

What's the deal with this man and his three daughters???? It's so strange that he spoils the adult and treats the little ones like dirt.

I would expect him to spoil the baby girls not the rusty grown woman. :?

As for 1/2 birthdays I always thought they were the excuse for summer birthdays to bring cupcakes to elementary school.

I had never seen the 1/2 birthday thing till this year. BS6's BD is in July, so the summer kids get to celebrate a 1/2 b day. I sent oreos for the class. I did not but my child a gift, wtf.

I have been following your blogs since this kid was 14 and could not be bothered to put away her shoes. I think your husband is never going to change and isn't capable of it. The best thing would be to seperate your money and split the bills, hit him where it hurts. I know you have said that he doesn't wan this and I think he has threatened divorce. I would call his bluff. My DH is screwed up and has been nothing but a roller coaster ride lately. Recently he brought up divorce and I told him I was fine with it either way, get his shit together or divorce me... he knows I am serious and he totally stopped that threat.

I called the attorney that did my 1st divorce to get pricing on a divorce with custody and one thing he asked me was did my husband have any money. I said no, and he replied then he would have a hard time fighting me for custody and stuff like that.

I am not sure you are at the point, but he has way more to loose than you do.

Who celebrates this? That is crazy. What a way for an over indulged step child to get more gifts and justify it to a Disney Dad. Holy Cow. I would flip out on DH.

I get why Elizabeth has stayed so long, because there is a lot IMO that goes into divorcing your spouse when there are kids and property and such. There is also the fear of having your children spending the EOW with a parent who isn't really a great parent and what the child is exposed to with out us there.

I know lots of women do it, but it is hard. I have been layimg the ground work for a while in my own marriage. As I was responding earlier to this post it really hit me how easy it is for me to tell her to seperate finances and call his buff. Pulling the trigger is way harder than telling someone else to do it.

The common thread with so many of us isn't the crazy bio mom or the crappy kids it is the crappy screwed up husband.

I'm so lucky, my birthday is my OSD's half-birthday!! There went my birthday. If my birthday was ever brought up OSD had to remind everyone that it was her half-birthday or she would say to me "Oh you know when my half-birthday is, don't you?" She was 20 years old the last time she said that to me. It would be nice if she didn't have to be the center of attention for once. And BTW, she's the mini-wife too.
UGH!

This is beyond pathetic! Your DH has his daughter sitting with him in the inner core of your entire relationship.

Our Counsellor told me you could look at our situation much like an onion. The inner core fits the two of you in the relationship, it can't fit anyone else. The first layer of the onion are the kids, 2nd layer family, 3rd layer friends, 4th layer acquaintances etc. If the core of the onion is rotten - the whole thing gets tossed out. If your DH keeps treating his SD like his spouse, he has pushed YOU out of the core, and therein sits the two of them.

Guess it's up to you now to decide whether you want to be in that core with him or go find yourself another onion, so to speak.

Personally, I would kick my DH's ass to the kerb if he did that. I'd much rather be alone with my bio's than in a situation like that.

It seems your rants are usually about things you've discovered whilst checking his phone.

Stop checking his phone.

If its your money he is spending then take away his power to spend it. You should not have to check his phone to find out what's happening to your money. Go to the bank and ask how to keep track of your money better.

If its his money, its his money.

Stop checking his phone.

I can't figure out which is the craziest~ the fact that he does this, or the fact that the OP pays for it. :?