UPDATE TO: Do your kids or step kids take things to school they aren't suppose to take?
Read previous blog. SD gets home from school early today and this is how it plays out.
ME: Let me see your backpack and your coat.
SD: Why?
ME: Well I went to put clothes on your bed today, for you to put up, and noticed your camera isn't where it usually is. Since you have had that camera it has always been in that spot when your not using it. I'm just wondering if know where it might be.
SD: I don't have it. I didn't take it to school, I don't know where it is.
Me: What do you mean you don't know where it is? We just got you that camera and you already lost it?
SD: No I didn't lose it.
ME: Then where is it? If not in your room then where could it be?
SD: I don't know, I can't find it. I didn't take it to school.
ME: Well then I suggest you start room to room and either find it or fess up.
SD: Fess up to what?
ME: Fess up to taking it to school. If you took it to school, it would be better if you just told me that you did and not lie about it. If your aren't lying then it will be in this house because I just seen you with it last night.
SD: Last I had it was when I was taking pictures of the cat.
ME: I remember that. I also remember you taking it back to your room when you were done, and on your way to take a shower.
SD: Well, I don't know where it is.
ME: Then you will be looking for it until you find it. If it takes all night then it takes all night. I will tell you though, that if it is at the school and you continue to lie to me then the situation will not be good for you.
SD: Well I'll look for it but I looked for it last night and couldn't find it either.
ME: Well you might as well start over then and look everywhere for it this time. I want to believe you but if it's not here then it's just not here SD. If you find it then we will be talking about the steps you need to take in order to not misplace your things again. It's not just going to get up and walk away so if it's not here then there is only one other place it can be.
SD: Alright but I probably won't be able to find it.
ME: It's not a question, I'm telling you to look for it.
I look through her stuff and don't find the camera. I really want to believe her and I really hope she finds it at the house. I think in the end if it is here she will still get it taken away for a week for not being responsible for her stuff or I will atleast make her leave it on the bookshelf in the living room when she isn't using it. I'm worried though because she had the deer in the headlights look on her face. If she did take it to school she left it in her locker. She is looking for it right now. How many people want to guess that she did in fact take it to school and didn't want to be caught bringing it back in the house so she left it?
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I'm probably a jerk for
I'm probably a jerk for saying this but after she "finds" the camera (likely after school tomorrow), I'd take it away for a good long time since she's clearly not responsible for having an expensive gift that she can lose in her room in less than 24 hours...
I'd go the "when you demonstrate you a responsible enough" route and not give her a time frame.
Yeah that's probably for the
Yeah that's probably for the best. I told her that she will be looking for this camera everyday until she finds it. I told her that if she did take it to school and is trying to sneak it back in, good luck because I'm just going to check her everyday she comes home from school. I told her that if she finds it then good. However, if she did take it to school and is just lying about it then the only way to solve the problem is to fess up because this problem is not just going to go away.
Probably because this isn't
Probably because this isn't the first thing she has mysteriously lost, later to find out she took it to school and got it stolen.
Seeings how I'm the one that
Seeings how I'm the one that purchased the camera then it's a little bit personal. I'm not jumping down her throat but I won't just let my DH handle everything because then why would she ever listen to me again? She would treat me like a doormat anytime she felt like it because she would think that I wouldn't do anything about it.
I will give her a chance to
I will give her a chance to find it. If she finds it, she finds it. If not then she is the only one that will know where it is. We can teach her it's not good to lie but we can't make her tell the truth if she decides she wants to lie about it. All I said was if it's here, like she said it was, then she will find it.
Oh I understand what you
Oh I understand what you meant. Yeah she is legally still my SD but her mother is signing her rights away, recently found this out, and hasn't seen her in a few years. I don't feel that DH should be the only one handling this because this is my house too, and as long as I am taking care of her she should have to listen to me too.
Can I just give you a fucking
Can I just give you a fucking high five? Buy you a martini????
All I can say is DAMN STRAIGHT. These men all want us SM's to have ALLLLLLL the responsibility of raising their kids, but NONE of the authority. Fuck that!
It's your house, your rules. I'm proud of you for laying it down. Whether she lied about taking it to school )I'm leaning toward yes) or she did misplace it at home- either way.... she knows you aren't fooling and this won't happen again.
I think if I had had the balls to do this in the VERY beginning, 90% of the pain and suffering we've been through as a family and a couple would NOT have happened.
Carry on with yo' bad self.
Lol
Lol
i'd search her belongings
i'd search her belongings daily until it turns up. if i had to do so until the end of the school year i would.
Oh I plan to. I told her this
Oh I plan to. I told her this isn't going to be settled until it's found or if she lied to tell the truth. Told her if she is lying we can't fix the problem until we find the truth. She is still looking and hasn't found it yet.
You do realize she not
You do realize she not actually looking for it lol. She's glancing over where it could be without really looking.
Your prob right.
Your prob right.
Wtf?
Wtf?
SMH. Some people's
SMH. Some people's parenting.....
Yep. It's all the SM's fault this kid cant keep track of her crap. :sick:
Seriously. Let's just stop
Seriously. Let's just stop any potential life lesson for accountability and respecting the things you are given.
SMH.
She is still "looking".
She is still "looking".
SS9 does this all the time.
SS9 does this all the time. He is supposed to wear a uniform to school every day, with black shoes. Bought him Jordans he begged for, which are white, and even after he asked and I told him no, he wore them to school. So I took them away but gave them back after like 2 weeks. He also lied and said he could bring the Ipad to school with permission, and I found out eventually that was a lie. He also got a hand me down Iphone after SS15 got a newer version and brought it to school even though we told him not to. Teacher calls me and lets me know that the next time he brings an electronic, she will take it and one of us will have to go pick it up. Yesterday morning, I took the iphone off the charger dock and put it in my sock drawer, because I realized that sometimes it's not home during the day. Sure enough, he gets up and asks where the iphone is. I told him not to worry, I'd find it when he gets home (just so he doesn't get tempted to take it). These kids are too much sometimes.
Please keep us posted, I want to know how this story turns out!
All kids take things to
All kids take things to school which they are not supposed to take.
I don't know that ALL kids
I don't know that ALL kids take things to school which they shouldn't take, but even if that were true, is it normal for them to do it one week after the next?