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BM can't seem to quit fattening SD up.

nunya1983's picture

Submitted by nunya1983 on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 12:37pm

When with us for a solid week, SD was able to lose 5 pounds (with little exercise). SD went back to BM for the weekend to go to a water park and nature preserve (so lots of movement and physical activity) and managed to gain every pound back. What the hell? Her pants we just bought that were fitting are now too tight. SD said she took her medicine the whole weekend. How do you gain 5 pounds in 2 days? I didn't know that was possible!

Comments

robin333's picture

Submitted by robin333 on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 12:54pm

Yeap. And it is very possible. I have seen someone gain 8lbs from one meal at a nice restaurant because of salt causing water retention.

nunya1983's picture

Submitted by nunya1983 on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 12:56pm

I realize that, I'm not doing anything with/to her. But I cook family breakfast, lunch, and dinner. She hardly exercises (unless dh instructs her too), but like you said "not my monkey, not my circus". The only reason I know is because dh told me.

Maxwell09's picture

Submitted by Maxwell09 on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 7:06pm

If it's not too much salt causing water retention and bloat then it could also be too much soda. That'll pack on the liquid pounds quickly. Offer her only water for the next visit and if those gained lbs don't dropped off then it's not water weight.

nunya1983's picture

Submitted by nunya1983 on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 1:01pm

Oh nooo! I hate when that happens... just means I need to lose more weight Wink

Could be water weight, but I've washed her shorts ever day this week(she wears them and then throws them in the washer every day, and I don't realize until I'm folding the laundry. Every day I've reminded her that they don't need to be washed evertime she wears them). They are pretty tight, as in she can't can't zip them up, so she's gone to wearing those stretchy loose dresses.

nunya1983's picture

Submitted by nunya1983 on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 1:15pm

Oh no! That sucks! And my SD sears she wears one size, but the style of the shirt/dress is meant to be baggy, but it is skin tight on her... yes she the kid that you shake your head at because she swears up and down that her size is (what ever) and is so tight that she had to keep pulling it down around her stomach.

nunya1983's picture

Submitted by nunya1983 on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 1:05pm

"she said losing more than 1-2 lbs a week was unhealthy for anyone who wasn't morbidly obese."

She is, according to the doctor.

I'm cooking normal healthy meals, incorporating lots of fruit and veggies (all the colors of the rainbow), lean proteins(chicken and fish), and whole grains. It's completely opposite of what/how bm feeds her.

nunya1983's picture

Submitted by nunya1983 on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 1:20pm

I'm concerned because she is a child in my care. Her health is at risk as she has diabetes. The only thing I do regarding it is listen to my husband's concerns, and cook healthy meals. Maybe some of it has to do with judgment, but that judgement is aimed at bm. The queen of Chinese take out and kfc.

hereiam's picture

Submitted by hereiam on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 1:04pm

Whatever happened with her doctor's appointment? Is she diabetic?

She hasn't gained 5 pounds of fat in two days (nor did she lose 5 pounds of fat in a week), a lot of it is water so she has probably been eating too many carbs (the wrong kind) and is bloated. Even so, it is obvious that BM is not looking out for SD's health and she is not eating right.

nunya1983's picture

Submitted by nunya1983 on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 1:06pm

It's in my blogs, she has type 2 diabetes, what used to be called adult onset diabetes. The doctor said that is due to her being obese.

hereiam's picture

Submitted by hereiam on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 1:12pm

And BM still doesn't care? Nice. With the proper diet and some exercise, she can reverse that. She is way too young to have to deal with diabetes, that is a shame.

What does SD think about all of this? Did the doctor talk to her about what she should be doing and eating? At only 10, she needs help, support, and guidance. BM should be ashamed of herself.

nunya1983's picture

Submitted by nunya1983 on Wed, 07/22/2015 - 5:54am

SD is excited about losing weight. She isn't motivated to "exercise" but after a week of eating healthy, she really has alot more energy. And can't sit still. It literally seems as if she is being poisoned. The first day back, she can't hold up her own weight, she's leaving on everything and everybody. She can't seem to sit on the couch, she's laying down everywhere. Yesterday her energy is back up a little, she's moving around a little, not laying on the couch, actually sitting up. Waking up a little earlier. She's even happier. By the end of last week, she was running everywhere. I had to remind her not to run in the house, if she'd like to run, please go outside. She went outside. She hasn't cried for no reason since the first few days of this month. During the first few days she was crying, and when asked she truly couldn't give a reason. Since she's been here, she hasn't cried except for when she was talked to harshly.

Oh Margie's picture

Submitted by Oh Margie on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 1:16pm

I know you guys are monitoring her nurtition due to the diabetes, but I have to wonder at the wisdom of subjecting the kid to a weigh in every time she she switches houses, even if it's just her Dad doing the weighing. I was 10 years old when my (extrememly kind and well meaning) Mom first gently talked to to me about my "weight" and I swear it set up a chain reaction that I still fight today. especially when SD is going to feel compared to your DD's who are both very slim and athletic. is it possible to focus more on the nutritional side of things?

Disneyfan's picture

Submitted by Disneyfan on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 1:18pm

Are you all making that kid get in a scale every week? :?

Expecting a 10 year to get up and exercise on her own isn't very realistic. Demanding dad get up off his butt and get moving along with his kid is.

How did this poor kid end up with two worthless parents?

nunya1983's picture

Submitted by nunya1983 on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 1:26pm

I guess because they were both stupid (young) when they bred. Dh now knew to someone who is very motivated? The doctor said to have her weigh once a week. At least until she gets closer to her ideal weight.

Disneyfan's picture

Submitted by Disneyfan on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 1:29pm

A doctor recommended that???? That kid is going to have serious weight issues as a teen and adult.

nunya1983's picture

Submitted by nunya1983 on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 1:33pm

I hope not, she doesn't hate it, she excited to see the weight go down. Especially if it means cute clothes that she can fit into better.

Oh Margie's picture

Submitted by Oh Margie on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 1:51pm

She may like it now when she having that first rush of losing her water weight but honestly, think long term. I am a 41 year old adult, I'd like to lose about 10 pounds and when I have a week when I eat clean and exercise and the scale hasn't budged or (god forbid) has gone up a bit I find it very VERY tough. And I know it all started in my childhood when my parents, with the best of intentions, first made me feel self conscious.

Maybe let her weigh herself on her own if she wants to, but I certainly wouldn't have her do it in front of others. i can't imagine how hard that will be for her. How did she react to the gain this week??

Disneyfan's picture

Submitted by Disneyfan on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 2:23pm

THIS

She will have periods where she is losing inches but not pounds. That doctor sounds like a quack.

robin333's picture

Submitted by robin333 on Tue, 07/21/2015 - 1:38pm

If I remember correctly, at BM's, SD gets up, wakes up her brother and then makes breakfast for both of them. And then wakes BM up. From what I recall, it sounded like SD is primary caregiver to her brother. And had a lot of other responsibilities too.

Stress will elevate your blood sugar. And she definitely sounds stress. I would encourage your DH to work with SD in determining a physical activity/hobby she enjoys and get her enrolled in a set class, league, whatever. That way she is active and has a positive stress reliever.

nunya1983's picture

Submitted by nunya1983 on Wed, 07/22/2015 - 5:28am

Well I wI'll mention SD seeing a dietician to dh then. Perhaps it's water weight, since we don't use much salt, we buy low sodium everything, we don't own juice or soda. I would still argue that is not all water weight, that at least some of it is fat.

nunya1983's picture

Submitted by nunya1983 on Wed, 07/22/2015 - 12:52pm

Like I said, the only thing I do is talk about food. Dh is the one who deals with the weight side of it. I'm not even in the room. Dh mentioned it to me as we were in bed and all the kids were already asleep on the other side of the house.

I'll forward these articles to dh and let him decide what to do.

I do realize that nobody can change the way bm feeds SD. We can only do what we do at our house. It is impossible to expect a child to turn down fried chicken and cupcakes if it's offered to her, or even just sitting on the counter in her home while she's alone.

I know I shouldn't care about what BM does in her home, but when a child have medical conditions and her own mother could care less, it really kinda sucks

Disneyfan's picture

Submitted by Disneyfan on Wed, 07/22/2015 - 1:28pm

But her dad let's her order and eat crap as well. He flip flops between letting her eat like a pig and playing the concerned dad.

That poor kid is doomed.