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BM wants to reinstate CS for SS18 (eye roll)

WokeUpABug's picture

SS18 has been emancipated since his graduation from high school. He's had a job this summer, and is off to college in two weeks. So by no means special needs.

DH and BM recently went to court over a number of issues. Long story short, DH got a decrease in support, SS18 emancipated, but we still need to pay 70 percent tuition private school for three remaining kids.

BM and DH recently received some paperwork regarding SS18 emancipation. In the paperwork it mentioned that SS18 was declared emancipated "without prejudice due to (BMs) lack of response to courts emancipation inquiry (this is letter they sent prior to SS birthday asking if there was some reason he needed to stay on support)".

BM writes to court that apparently she DID send a response, and to the extent it was not considered when the order was issued, she would like a reconsideration.

Two things:
1. I honestly can't believe she sent a letter asking that able bodied able minded SS still be considered for support.
2. They just fought a court battle over this for crissakes. Who cares about some letter she sent to the court one year ago?

She really is pathetic. I know it will come to nothing but its so annoying. I cannot wait until the day the last kid ages out.

Comments

robin333's picture

You know, college expenses and private school aren't enough... And SS is special, why should he have to work or be responsible?

Your BM is something. Maybe you should sell your house with the remodeled kitchen so you can support BM even more.

Sorry for the sarcasm. I despise outright greed. Focus on the positive : Wtf is BM going to do when the financial support ends?

WokeUpABug's picture

That's what it is, just out and out greed. I know I am horrible but I just can't wait until CS is over because BM will be in such bad straits. I know this because I saw her whole financial picture in her bankruptcy petition

mommy0104's picture

Must be a lot of this crazy BM greed going around lately. My DH just received a pay cut at work and when BM got wind of it, her first instinct was to yell at DH that "HER child support better not decrease just because he (my DH) is too stupid to have a good paying job"..greed...UGH!

WokeUpABug's picture

Oh I saw your blog. Your BM is crazy too. While I agree with your position that it is morally right to pay CS, your BM, like mine, sounds like she only spends a fraction on the kids. Thus while I agree our DHs should pay, I don't think they should pay an amount any higher than what is ordered by the courts.

mommy0104's picture

Yeah, the longer i'm in this step life, the more I see why child support is such a hot topic issue..our SO's do what's morally right and yet it's never enough for the BM's. They're so greedy and set on punishing our DH's..and I'm over here getting 75 cents every six months (no lie) for my BS14 and I don't even care..it's really not worth the fight with my ex..can't really do a whole lot when he chooses to break the law and sit in prison LOL!

robin333's picture

What really bothers me is how some BM'S don't use it for the kids. Rather, it is used for their lifestyle and DH'S are guilted for extras beyond CS. I'm not saying that CS is a bad thing at all, just that some BM'S greed and vengeance supercedes spending the CS for the kid. While some BM'S and BD's receive very little inconsisently, some of our BM'S are constantly trying to get more.

Honestly, I think our BM thought DH would continue to pay CS because she felt like he owed her, not the kid, her. I have no idea what BM will do. I mean, she's only 50. It might be time to get a full time job and start to be responsible for yourself.

mommy0104's picture

Exactly!!! And if the courts thought my DH owed BM any money herself, he would've made him pay ALIMONY and not just child support. And although my skids are very well taken care of, BM (in my opinion) does use alot of the money she gets for her own "needs" I think buying a 5 bedroom house for 3 people and new furniture for every room in the huge house is a bit beyond taking care of SD17...especially since less than 6 months later, she lost it all! And somehow it's DH's fault for not making enough..yet we both know (dh and I) that BM makes way more than DH does...yes, CS is a good thing for the kids..but like you said, it's being so misused and some of our BM's don't want it for the right reasons. I receive very little and very inconsistently for my BS14, but I'm not going to spend my life being bitter about it..it is what it is..I knew what kind of "man" my ex was when I got with him. However, it is annoying to watch so many women be obsessed with getting more...I think child support has strayed so far away from when it was initially established. It was to make sure children were taken care of beyond divorce...now it seems to be (like we've said before) about vengeance and greed..

hereiam's picture

I am so glad that my SD was emancipated due to getting married. I have no doubt that BM would have tried to pull some kind of crap to try to keep CS going.

notsobad's picture

I feel so lucky that BM thinks she's smarter than everyone and thought that she could make DH do whatever she wants. She didn't want to spend money on lawyers so DH and BM decided everything, outside of court.
She got a lot more than she should have in the beginning, A LOT more! And he still paid for all the extras, everything for school and outside activities.

Luckily, the parents of the kids the skids hung out with talked about how much she shopped and didn't have a job. Skids saw her new stuff and knew it all came from DHs money.

When SS turned 18 and went to University she got $0. She knew it was coming and had taken a realtor course so she had a job (first in 20 years) but it didn't pay very well.
DH gave both SS and SD $ for living expenses. They both got athletic scholarships, but couldn't work because they had to devote so much time to sports. We know that there were times they gave some of that $$ to BM but it wasn't worth fighting over, she was stealing from her kids and that's their deal.

SD has one more year and then that's it, done. BM moved to a smaller market, where no one knows her LOL and has done well in real estate. Thank God because if she hadn't she might have started looking at Dh to take care of her and even talked to a lawyer and found out what she missed by doing it herself.

notsobad's picture

Both skids worked summer jobs and DH didn't pay anything in the summer. That's how we found out they'd been giving her some of their expense money.
She called screaming that he had to give the skids money over the summer, that it wasn't fair that her boyfriend was paying to feed them. (She was living with a guy, renting her house out but still not working) Skids lived with them when school was out.
He said they both have jobs, they can buy their own food. She said they were saving it for school, he called bull shit, he gives them enough to live on and have a few extras.

We realized that she was getting money from the skids to buy groceries and her BF was tired of paying for her and her kids. No doubt. They broke up shortly after the skids went back to school.

notsobad's picture

Here, if you are divorced you are responsible for 1/2 of post secondary. My ex didn't think he'd have to pay any, I didn't even need a lawyer, his lawyer told him he'd lose if he went to court.
Plus, CS goes until the child is 26 if they are in full time post secondary.

I knew all of this and so my ex is still paying CS and half of tuition for bios. I give the CS directly to BS for living expenses, plus extra because we did a budget and CS wouldn't cover all his living expenses.

BM didn't know this and so DH gives an amount from a budget that we did with them, directly to them.