Opportunity to come ...
A vent on how I feel this morning
I have been offered an opportunity to go abroad to do further training. I have one year left here that I need to do in Europe but there is potential to do the next part of my training in a better system half way across the world. The length of how long I could stay remains unknown but minimum would be a year
I have been working for this opportunity before I met my now partner. We have been together the last few years and I think it works cause kids are his priority and career is mine.
I want this opportunity. I amnt even going to lie to you guys and down play it
I brought it up with partner to see how far he can move in the issue. And he can't move the kids at all. It would not be fair to them or BM. I understand. I asked would he be interested in coming. He says he wants to be near the kids- I get that and I see the horror others here went thru over that.
I asked if he wanted to do long distance then. He says he doesn't believe in doing that; that it kills people
So this morning I can't help but feel like there is a big time clock placed above our heads with a count down to the end of next year. Now I feel like we wasted three and half years of each other's lives cause in the end, he will be tied to the kids.
Honestly I feel a bit of a mug this morning...
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Comments
Why do you feel like a mug?
Why do you feel like a mug? This is an amazing opportunity, you offered more than one solution. Your spouse is choosing none of these. Is a year apart really that much? Time passes quickly and depending on your financial situation, romantic sexy fly ins are possible.
Hey monchichi I feel a bit of
Hey monchichi
I feel a bit of a mug cause I knew it was coming yet I still feel surprised. I knew this opportunity was there and that I wanted it , that it was my end goal and that hadn't changed. But at same time I knew he had the kids and wouldn't want to be too far away from them.
Now I feel like there is a time point on my relationship- which there is really I guess
It's still a year away, anything can happen but now I am kinda starting to feel like it is real and tangible
There's no need to feel bad.
There's no need to feel bad. Both of you are making the right decisions.
Read between the lines. He just made it crystal clear that the relationship is over once you move. Why wait until then? Why not end it now since you both know that is what's coming down the pipe?
Congratulations on getting
Congratulations on getting the opportunity. Don't let it go.
You were probably hoping he'd
You were probably hoping he'd follow you and support you like any other available partner would. This man however has shown u that you are not and will never be his priority. Why waste another year on a man that will never acknowledge and support your needs? Why give him another year of whatever it is he's getting out of this "relationship" when you know you will never receive that in return? Free yourself to find the kind of man you need. You will never find mr right if u continue wasting time with mr wrong. Love yourself first and always
Two roads diverged in a
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth
.....
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
"If you don't want kids, then
"If you don't want kids, then I might consider hanging out with this mana while longer to see if some reflection on the situation opens up any options."
Doing that means she will miss out on this great opportunity that she has been working toward. Tossing this opportunity away just to roll the dice on a man is crazy.
Hey guys sorry I didn't see
Hey guys sorry I didn't see the rest of the posts on this one.
I am 30. I have decided to hang in there until at least July and then make the final decision once I know for sure if it will be my turn to get the opportunity the year after.
Thanks for all the help and I am glad most people are feeling same way about it I do
It will be sad to end it but he has been given many options