2017 the year I'm no longer a SM

if you have been reading my previous posts I cannot wait until DH terminates his rights to SS14!!!! Then we can get in with our lives as if he never existed. We have talked to an attorney who said she can get his rights terminated and BM has agreed to sign the paperwork.

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I'm so sorry for all you have

I'm so sorry for all you have been through. My advice though is to not assume the door is closed forever. He may attempt contact in 15 years.

It would be in your SD's (and

It would be in your SD's (and her brothers)best interest to have him terminate his rights. He is such an awful parent, that the 3 of them would be better off.

Yes I am a little confused...

Yes I am a little confused... I agree what the boy did is awful... but the dad just decided to cut all ties with his son and be done with him? Is this child getting help? Therapy?

when a parent's rights are

when a parent's rights are terminated, they are NOT responsible anymore.

It's really not that hard to grasp the concept.

It depends. As usual, the

It depends. As usual, the answer lies in the shades of grey and you reside in black and white world. In Michigan, financial responsibility is seldom extinguished, though it can be if the non-terminating parent can prove to the Court that he/she is able to support the child.

Your blanket ALWAYS and NEVER statements simply don't apply here, or anywhere really.

AND, even if the financial responsibility remains, the LEGAL obligation does not, so your argument that he is still legally responsible for a child to whom he has terminated rights is just plain wrong.

https://www.steptalk.org/node

https://www.steptalk.org/node/233239 <-- if the boys sole focus is to not be with his father or rather be with his mother to the exclusion of his father, that he is prepared to go so far as to molest his half siblings then I don't see any other outcome to this.

What? Someone here making up

What? Someone here making up BS controversial stories to get attention? Never! Good lord, Trump... Who do you think we are? Reddit?

I can't agree and if his IQ

I can't agree and if his IQ is that low why is he being remanded in to his mother care? Honey,I am quite fond of you but I don't agree that this man should stand by his son who molested his other sons.

As for the poster she isn't answerable for her husbands. She is going in to fright or flight mode for her children. I doubt a single one of us on here can begin to imagine what this woman is going through. Her sole instinct is to protect her children no matter what. Give her a break.

His IQ was apparently high

His IQ was apparently high enough for him to concoct this plan. Very conniving. If I were a prosecutor I would have prosecuted. Maybe it would have come out that he had some help devising this scheme.

How can one argue that a kid

How can one argue that a kid has a terribly low IQ and thus should be poo pooed and needs help from dad in one breath and then state how he maliciously set out to molest his siblings, knowing that he would be sent to live with his mother? I don't care if he has a low IQ or not, he knew what he was doing, it was premeditated, obviously thought out with and end game plan in place.

also my thoughts, for what

also my thoughts, for what they are worth.

and neither do you.

and neither do you. Seriously, tommar, enough with the absolutes.

One thing step life has taught us ALL is that there are no absolutes.

sigh, go back and read, yes

sigh, go back and read, yes you did. It WILL happen. He WON'T be let off the hook.

Absolutes, dear. Absolutes.

I think abdolutes are an

I think abdolutes are an exercise benefitting both abdominals AND glutes with one exercise...

I don't know US law as well

I don't know US law as well as I know mine however a brief search shows the following:

In the parent-child relationship, parents have some basic rights and responsibilities. Both parents automatically have the right to make decisions about the child's education, religion, health care, and other important concerns. However, a court can take these rights away from a parent if he or she violates the law, or in the father's case, never claims paternity. A parent can also voluntarily terminate his or her rights. Termination of parental rights ends the legal parent-child relationship.

Nope - while you may have an

Nope - while you may have an argument that this dad might have a moral obligation to a child he created, if his rights are terminated, either voluntarily or not, the legal obligation is extinguished.

Guys, I think Trump may be

Guys, I think Trump may be right about this. Unless the mother is very well off financially or has a spouse that is willing to adopt, they don't normally let a parent terminate their rights. They can certainly say,"I no longer wish to see this kid" but they would still be on the hook financially. Maybe it's different in different states but I know in my old state that my ex's rights could only be terminated if there was someone else willing to step up and adopt the kids or if he was beating the piss out of them. Since neither scenario was true, he technically is their father. He is still financially responsible for them. But he has no visitation and no legal rights to them.

ETA: My ex would have been more than happy to give up his rights so he didn't have to pay and I would have been happy to have them terminated. But it just wasn't an option.

there's really no way of

there's really no way of knowing what could happen or what a judge may or may not sign off on. op has not been back around to clarify any questions or give any further info.

Do you honestly believe that

Do you honestly believe that the father is responsible for his son molesting his other sons?

IF a parent has terminated

IF a parent has terminated rights to a child, they are no longer legally responsible for said child. They may have to pay child support, but they would not be held liable for that kid's actions in a court of law.

You didn't answer my

You didn't answer my question.

re·spon·si·ble
adjective
adjective: responsible

having an obligation to do something, or having control over or care for someone, as part of one's job or role.
"the department responsible for education"
synonyms: in charge of, in control of, at the helm of, accountable for, liable for
"who is responsible for the prisons?"
being the primary cause of something and so able to be blamed or credited for it.
"the gene was responsible for a rare type of eye cancer"
synonyms: accountable, answerable, to blame, guilty, culpable, blameworthy, at fault, in the wrong
"if an error's been made, I'm the one who's responsible"

Text can be misunderstood.

Actually, that depends on the

Actually, that depends on the state. In my state, you're right, but that's not the case everywhere.

I'd like to see that - please

I'd like to see that - please post a link to the source of your information.

Trump - are you saying that

Trump - are you saying that sanecatlady is not being truthful? She SAID she knows someone who terminated her rights to her child, but you are doubting that?

I was hoping this iteration of tommar might be slightly more reasonable. My bad...

i deal w/ a few hundred low

i deal w/ a few hundred low iq people on a daily basis who are being legally held accountable for their OWN actions.

ETA - and the judges get pizzzzzed when mommy or daddy try to take over the offender's responsibility.

i wish i could. we can only

i wish i could. we can only go off the info OP gives us, anything else is speculation.

i have a hunch tho' that part of the reason no charges are being pressed may be due to his age and the agreement between the adults. but once again, that's just pure speculation.

remember, doll, you take

remember, doll, you take issues like this very seriously and deeply but you have to remember that we're not talking moralities here, just strictly legalities.

it's always a possibility.

it's always a possibility. h3ll even i could be a troll. i do have fuzzy hair.......

d@mn i wish we had someone

d@mn i wish we had someone commenting who is an attorney AND judge specializing in family law. that would be so helpful!

if both parents agree, and

if both parents agree, and the legal documents are set into place and signed by a judge, then no one can hold the man responsible for anything *legally* regarding his son. should he still handle parental duties? YES. but no one will be legally able to enforce that.

OP can I ask you to remind us

OP can I ask you to remind us on your statement of you SS's IQ and ability to understand his actions. I understand for privacy reasons you deleted the blog. As in how low is his IQ. Below average, retardation level?

His iq is 69

well. good morning, all.

lol!!!!

there, there.... *hums

there, there....
*hums lullaby softly*

The OP said before the SS has

The OP said before the SS has a seizure disorder and a brain tumor(s) and also that her DH was paying child support and back child support. It doesn't seem likely that BM would really let him ex off the financial hook when dealing with an ill child. Aside from all the molestation stuff I would imagine that his medical issues are costly.

You posted links for

You posted links for involuntary termination of rights. OP would be a voluntary termination of rights.

There are actually a few

There are actually a few women on here who have personally been through this. (Dad gave up rights).

I could be wrong but I think in 100 percent of those cases, there had to be a man willing to adopt the skid before they could give up rights. Usually BMs boyfriend.

I'm surprised that the courts

I'm surprised that the courts are letting dad off the hook. I wonder what made the judge think that this is the best option for the kid. To have his dad terminate his rights. And what the benefit of terminating his rights would be. Especially if the child and father have had a decent relationship this whole time.

Since this child is a huge risk to the community I am very surprised a Judge has not formally ordered specialized placement.

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2017 the year I'm no longer a SM

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