Okay-I wrote all the abnormal behaviors down and can't make any sense of it- at all?
This is what I am observing on a day to day if not week to week basis from BM:
1: BM wants DH to take SS5 on her weekends yet is witholding normal visitation.
2:BM does not want DH to have any knowledge of what SS5 is doing on a daily basis.
3: DH does not even know where BM is working yet BM knows every move on DH's end regarding employment, hours, etc.
4:BM has never wanted to speak to SS5 while at our home yet calls the landline while SS5 is with her.
5: BM refuses normal communication from DH yet forces SS5 to "act" like he is talking on a voicemail. (huh?)
6: Week to week; BM is screaming yet another week can go by at pick-up and BM acts like nothing never happened.
7: BM refuses to let DH see any documentation regarding school yet screams at DH at what a complete POS dad he is in front of SS5.
8: BM sends an email to DH expecting a 30 second reply yet when DH emails BM, she never answers.
9: Every week SS5 grows more afraid and distant from me. It is as if he has been told MWC would "eat" him for dinner.
10: BM sends emails in regards to something that had nothing to do with the email that DH sent. Lack of memory?
11: BM sends ss5 in rags yet spends monies for her to run around at the YMCA.
12: BM has never dated. (yeah really)
13: BM is told (legally) to communicate only via email yet will call landline using SS5 on speakerphone.
This is just the start of it all. I am trying to prepare something to show to the courts.
Sorry to rant again~
why cant DH get info
why cant DH get info straight from school? that is what we do. inMA yous end in the CO to the school along with a letter. MY BF provides stamped envelopes and we get all the notices, report cards, and when it is a good teacher (liek last year) copies of the best and worst school work, or notes about areas where extra help is needed.
DH has tried this for YEARS
DH has tried this for YEARS and we have NEVER received copies of report cards or anything from the school. We provided copies of our CO to the school and we even had BM contact the school as well and still nothing. It's ridiculous!
you need to take it to your
you need to take it to your school district administration then. i will admit, the first year, BF really had to stay on them. he had to remind them, and many an email was sent to the principal or reminder phone call.
the high schools (both of them) have not been a problem ever. not sure why elementary is such a pain.
DH tried to talk to teacher
DH tried to talk to teacher on his way to work on Monday and she was told by BM to not talk with either of us and to notify her attorney? This left the teacher in an akward position so DH let it go for that day.
DH had sent several emails asking for info from BM in these regards. No answers to this day.
Back to court again.
no check your state law.
no check your state law. and do not go thru the teacher. here in MA, the letter must go to the principal. The letter, here, must accompany an affidavit that he is the parent etc. It must also include the decree and CO, which obviously states they share legal custody and hence medical and educational records.
here, the school then notifies the mom and she has 3 weeks to object. objections are limited in scope and cannot be just because. even then, if say she had a restraining order against the dad, the school would still have to under the law send he records to dad, but black out moms name and address.
dont deal with the teacher. she is just a teacher. you have to go in and talk to the administration. you are not the only divorced family in the school. and once you set it up, bm cannot legally interfere.
Florida Florida Statutes
Florida
Florida Statutes 61.13 (2)(b)3
3.
Access to records and information pertaining to a minor child, including, but not limited to, medical, dental, and school records, may not be denied to a parent because the parent is not the child's primary residential parent. Full rights under this subparagraph apply to either parent unless a court order specifically revokes these rights, including any restrictions on these rights as provided in a domestic violence injunction. A parent having rights under this subparagraph has the same rights upon request as to form, substance, and manner of access as are available to the other parent of a child, including, without limitation, the right to in-person communication with medical, dental, and education providers.
And so....ta da!
Does anybody else see a
Does anybody else see a Passive-Agressive or BPD thing going here too?
I quit trying to label the
I quit trying to label the crazy and call it what it really is - controlling bitch!! Seriously, MWC, she is probably both of those things, but what is causing her behavior is really irrelevant. The only thing that will get her ass in line is for your dh to consistently refuse to play games with her. She is supposed to email. He needs to ignore any communication on the land line. Change your numbers. If all communication is to be email, she doesn't need your numbers. File contempt charges everytime she refuses regular visitation even if you think it isn't doing any good, it will be good to have a record. Refuse to take SS on her visitation time. The only way to stop this kind of behavior is to show her complete INDIFFERENCE. Wingnut has tried every tactic in the book. Dh has a standard response "that it is not problem. Figure it out". He doesn't waiver on this no matter how much she kicks, screams, threatens, cries or tries to guilt him. Her antics have decreased a 1000 times over since he's taken this approach.
"A pessimist complains about the wind, an optimist counts on the wind changing, a realist adjusts his sails"
Sounds totally BPD or
Sounds totally BPD or Bipolar to me. This is all same things we get from BM here, and she is both.
Thanks guys for the info on
Thanks guys for the info on school. The problem is that it is a private free 4K program.
I think they still recieve state funding so the school district administration would indeed be in order.
we dealt with a private
we dealt with a private school here and they adhered to state law. you should be all set.
Thanks! SVS~ You are
Thanks!
SVS~ You are correct--this is indeed a YP (Your Problem DH) Not a MP (MY Problem MWC)
I've got to get out of this funk.
Folkmom--Thanks! I'll print it out to hand to DH to deal with.
Cruella~ MIL just called
Cruella~ MIL just called too!
After listening to DH back in the office literally wear my ear off ~ as soon as I hang up, The MIL calls to ANNOUNCE that DH's own SD has a birthday coming up in a week...WTF? Who in their right, or left mind would call in the middle of this shit to remind via voicemail about a Birthday?! Yayness holy shit
Am I like on some other planet here? Who gives a shit quite frankly?
MWC: "Yes'm ma'am, iz gonna get rights to it " holy crap
I'm the one going f'ing nuts.
Duh- I wonder why I
Duh- I wonder why I miscarried.
No way in hell any woman could carry with this. No way. Maybe ship my ass off to a remote island for 9 plus months but still have to come back to this? No flippin way.
LOL- "Birthday" reminder
LOL- "Birthday" reminder from MIL...Sorry but that is hysterical. What a pill.