fiance wont help me fight psycho BM in court
My psycho BM left me voice mail last night because she said that I could not see my kids again because of a conflict with their games and times. I told my fiance that I was going to file a motion in court forcing her to let me see my kids on my schedule days without all the drama. I want to do what I want with my kids. Psycho BM just keeps enrolling them in things on my times. My fiance said, not on her dime because I don't make much and most of my check goes to CS . I have tryed to have it reduced , but , the judge declined it. My fiance said that we are over and to move out on Monday. She won't deal with all this drama anymore. So, now I faced being homless because I don't make enough for rent and CS. No room at famlies apartment and friends are married with children. So I will probably be homeless on Monday and put my things in storage. I am so sad today and I am suppose to start my new job in two weeks. I don't know what will happen or where to go . 
Happy, I am glad you are
Happy, I am glad you are here. I can't go to my parents for any support. It would only cause more drama. They like to talk alot. They don't care if I am sad. All they care is that they are happy. They don't like my fiance because she does not take people talking garbage and gossip lightly. My mother has said really nasty things about my fiance and my fiance knows this.I don't know if I can even afford a studio right now. My new job is strickly commision and I have not told my current boss that I am leaving soon. My stomach is in knots and I just want to go to heaven at this point.
People in my life have run
People in my life have run over me because I am very passive and I look to help others out.Most people see this as a weakness. I can't go to my sisters because my fiance has a complaint against her for threating phone calls. I know , what a mess my life is. I could write a book of the nice guy that went nowhere in life. Soon, I will be alone without my fiance and without my parents and without my kids. So, what is the point of living? I am not a bad looking guy either not that I am stuck up at all, but, seems all the people whom are idiots have all the luck. Sorry about the rants.
I have been to counseling
I have been to counseling after my divorce. My fiance just texted me that she is mad at herself for letting me in.She has indicated that she wants to move to Florida in a couple of years because everything is expessive here and she has family down there.She knows that I love my children. But, she says that I invite the drama by asking for my psycho BM for things. Eg, names of my daughters teachers. My fiance said I could have gotten that myself. She says I feel the need to communicate with the psycho BM that invites drama. Because, BM will start with her drama and tell me what I need to do. That upsets my fiance.I told my fiance that I would sheild her from family drama.I am afraid of going home at 5pm and seeing my stuff in boxes or at the door.
Why should your motion in
Why should your motion in court be your fiance's problem? She's engaged to you... not your baggage. And because you're broke, you've probably already been a huge expense for her. Only saying this because my boyfriend has a bd and I have no children. It's expensive to be with him because all of his money goes to cs too, but I certainly wouldn't take on his court costs. He's a grown man, and if he can't support himself on his own merit, I'm not going to be his provider.
Happy Search you are awesome
Happy Search you are awesome what great advise! That makes me feel better too and I have a different type of situation... very nice thanks!
I don't think I've commented
I don't think I've commented on your posts before because I didn't want to hurt your feelings. Long ago you made a post that your fiance didn't want you to mention your children in front of her because "they had no place in your life together". I thought she was terrible from that moment on. Everything else you have posted about her has not changed my mind.
She doesn't want you to see your kids, and she certainly doesn't want them around her. It seems to me that she would be more than happy if you never saw them again (I also remember her trying to get you to move away from them). Well, it's been easy for her up till now because your ex won't let you see them, but now that you actually want to do the right thing and have the courts enforce visitation, look what she's doing?
Not only does she want you to choose between your family and her, she wants you to choose between your CHILDREN and her, and she threatens you with breaking up left and right! I don't blame her for not wanting to put her own money into the situation, that's completely fair and her choice....but you are allowing her to walk all over you. Do you REALLY want to be with a woman who doesn't want you to see your children? Think long and hard about this. You are their father and need to do right by them. There are plenty of women who would like a nice guy like yourself and treat you with respect. I think you should bail now and never look back.
Sorry for being harsh, but what I see happening here is not fair to you or your children.
Oh, I don't think she should
Oh, I don't think she should pay a cent of her own money for his court battle. I also think she shouldn't have to put up with his family talking trash about her. But I think that him never seeing his children again is exactly what she wants. I think it's convenient for her that the ex never let him see the kids, and when Pat said she didn't want the kids even "mentioned", that was pretty telling. Of course this is my take and opinion after reading months of posts by him.
I agree there is a lot more to this story than has been told, so who knows what's really going on. I think Pat won't stand up for himself to anybody, and he failed to stand up for his fiance in certain situations too. I think his family walks all over him, his ex walks all over him, and his fiance walks all over him. I think he needs to be single, work on getting his visitation, work on getting his life together, and work on learning to stand up for himself or he will ALWAYS be the "victim".
Step , that is true. We are
Step , that is true. We are working at choosing our battles. My fiance said if psycho BM said I could not see them , then my Fiance said she would help me fund a court battle. I wanted to get psycho BM to stop putting them in so many activities on my time. So, me and fiance decided to try to make games together. Fiance did go to the ER last Sat night with high BP and was treated and released. So, we are headed in that direction.
She said she does want me to
She said she does want me to see them. But, forcing BM to take them out of their activies because it is my day ,well, that is wrong and she wont fund it with everything else. She said we can go to games , but she would only fund a court battle when psycho BM says I can't see my kids.So, we are working together on this.
Happy, This weekend was a
Happy,
This weekend was a turning point for us. After my last post ,fiance went to the ER. I had to leave work early and meet her there. We were there for 5 hours. She is ok. Her BP was way high. The doctor said it was possible because of stress since xrays and blood work was ok. Then I took her home. We discussed that it is not that she does not want me to see my kids, it is that she will not fund me to force visitation to take kids out of their activities. If my kids want to be involved in activities, then forcing the courts to pull them out will have them resent me. So, we talked about going to their games when possible. My fiance agreed ,but does not want psycho BM near us. So, we are moving in that direction for now.
Be glad you found out about
Be glad you found out about your fiance now. You're better off without her.
Gut it up and ask your parents for help. You're in no position to complain about their lifestyle and talking habits.
Don't give your boss more than a day or two of notice that you're leaving he'll just lock the door on you.
Good for you for getting the court to help on that visitation. Once you got that court order stick to it and if he interferes with it again take the back to court of contempt of court.