It has been a long time since I have posted on here. Needless to say nothing has been better.

After he was severed she then served him with a contempt charge as she kept sending the kids over with a cellphone and calling it constantly. He took the phone away so that he could actually spend time with the kids. He would let them call her before they went to bed at night so, she is bringing him to court for that. She is also holding him in contempt because he hasn't paid his half of the medical bills. Funny how that works out, since he has NEVER seen them. She would text, you owe me for medical bills, no amount, no bill, just a text. It took a court order by his attorney to get these bill. He is holding her in contempt for keeping him from the kids, not including him on any decisions that are made about the children (they have joint legal), and taking them out of state without notifying him.

She ends up sending a letter after SO 2nd attempt to get the medical bills stating that she has been taking SS to a therapist and he has been diagnosed for severe depression (this is shocking to both of us since he is the happiest little boy at our home). She wants 1/2 of those bills because the therapist is out of network (she also has this child listed under her newly married name to see this therapist). She then provides paper medical bills dating all the way back to 2009 (that have yet to be paid by her admission). She also has never provided info on either SS doctors, insurance, or school information. SO has never seen a report card in the 3 years the children have been in school. She goes around acting as if she has sole custody but can't seem to grasp the concept that she didn't have these children alone.

The attorneys meet for a pre-trail on the modification to the parenting agreement. SO had suggested moving forward with a state appointed mediator as he did not want to spend the money on a GAL as he will likely be paying for his attorney's fees and her since she is unemployed. His attorney warned him that the state mediator is generally sided toward the woman but he thought since it was free it is worth giving a try. SO and BM meet with the mediator yesterday, she started doing everything she normally does (i.e. exaggerating, lying, crying, generally being dramatic) at the beginning of the mediaton the mediator immediately jumps to BM's side but as time passes and BM is caught in lies the mediator starts to catch on. The mediator even states that it seems that what BM does is in BM's best interest and not the children's. SO went out of the meeting feeling cautiously optimistic. Then he receives the letter today for the mediator's summary of the meeting and it only discusses BM side! She barely acknowledges that he is in the room just BM is mad about this and BM thinks BF is doing all this out of spite. Not to mention many of the facts are completely wrong which we have proof by emails and texts from BM, it is like the "mediator" went out of her way to caterer to the BM because she is the BM!

I have never seen my SO so upset, it has brought him to tears. The SO has provided this woman with a car, increased her child support every time he gets a raise, works with her on everything and tried to caterer to her every whim in order to make things better for the children. But of course he has been lumped into the "dead beat Dad" category because he is a male.

I am upset and he is upset. We all used to get along but when she saw that SO and I were getting serious, she lost it. She even admits that this is directly related to me. She says that he became "more controlling" of her when we started dating. If someone could make that make sense it would be a surprise to me. She is married and has a son with another man! Why he let's her get away with this I have no idea? I would be pretty upset if my wife/husband was obsessed with their ex.

Why is it that SO has done everything for her and the kids and she doesn't see it that way? Why are the courts so against the men? Why do we have to pay an EXTREMELY high priced lawyer just to try to get things on a level playing field? Everything he has purposed to her is 50/50 and she won't stand for it. She has to have more holidays and more time with the kids because she doesn't have a job or career and hasn't her entire life. HER ENTIRE LIFE IS HER KIDS! I would think that it would be a good thing but she literally has separation anxiety from her kids. She even admitted that in the mediation but does the mediator acknowledge that? Of course not. Does the mediator acknowledge that the BM exaggerated every story? Nope. The mediator even said in the meeting that it is not up to SO or BM if I will get rid of my cat (BM is sure that one of the boys is deathly allergic to the cat, he has yet to show a symptom and he has yet to see a test). Yet, in the letter to the attorneys it states that if SO sees a form stating that SS is allergic that he will get rid of the cat. Since it isn't his property he is going to have one hell of a time trying to get rid of it. She is just looking for any reason to have control in our life

SO is ready to just give up at this point, BM had 3 fathers in her life, all of them are terrible examples for a Father so when she sees a father taking care of his kids she just doesn't get it.

I wish that I had a question to all this but I don't. It seems that this is just the reality. The court system will always see her as a victim, as a martyr for choosing to stay at home with the kids because she didn't want to get an education or career. And those of us who choose to have a better life will always pay. We pay financially and emotionally, but who cares right? He is just a man!