1. Yes, early on in the relationship that was the case, now he doesn't.

2. Early on, he and the skid would plan stuff and include me as an afterthought. Sometimes this still happens, but i've learned to insert myself and plan things with them, or plan things for just skid and I, or greatfully exclude myself when I don't want to participate. I believe he does this because he feels he needs to spend time with her when we have her. Our dynamic is centered around skid when she's with us, however, as she gets older it has gotten easier.

3. We've been together now for 5 years. If I had an amazing opportunity for a job out of the city, then yes, it would be an interesting conversation. We have skid about 60%. Skid depends on us (mostly DH) for everything. We are her primary, so I would not only be leaving the city, I would be leaving my marriage.

For me, these issues became easier to handle as the relationship evolved. I think if you still have these same issues after being together for 5 years...then you need to re-evaluate your relationship and your importance within it.

1. Early on this would have been yes. Once he got his head out of his butt he has learned he doesn't have to listen to BM's crap!!!

2. He was conflicted about this part for a while but now he knows that he is doing her no favors by holding her up above everything else. I exclude myself from plans to give them bonding time. We have EOW so I plan stuff for BF and I during our time. Skid time is for family type things.

3. This would be hard I honestly don't know what he would do.

Yikes.
1. No. He did however go to an awful lot of lengths to avoid conflict with SD, even when it meant conflict with me. That's gotten better...

2. In the beginning yes - he was Disney dad, all entertainment, all SD all the time because god forbid the girl ever got Bored or had to do something she didn't want. This has also gotten better, he stopped feeling so guilty daddy all the time and has started to see that she's not interested in him if he's not giving her something. One of the last times we saw her, they were out bonding and we had dinner plans at his sister's, so they had to come back home to pick me up. She got snotty, Why can't Aeron just drive herself, and they had a nice little "chat"

3. No, if I got a great opportunity or my health required I move, he'd go in a minute. However, we don't live close to SD and BM now.

We also have a huge PAS issue, so at this point SD wants basically nothing to do with her dad unless she thinks there's something in it for her.

I hope things get better for you!

1. My BF/husband will go to any length to avoid conflict with BM, even if it means causing conflict with me.
- He does avoid conflict with BM's as much as possible...but if it was them or me he would definitely battle them out. He gets where his bread is buttered.

2. My BF/husband would always rather do activities with skid. Only when skid isn't available or is uninterested, do I get chosen
- No, not at all

3. If for some reason, BF/husband and I couldn't live in the same city/state (job, health issue etc.) I know he would stay where BM and skid are and I would be on my own. Worse, if we had kids together, I am sure he would leave them behind too to stay with skid.
- No, on the contrary if I wanted to leave he would start packing our bags. I am the one that demands we stay here where his girls are.

1. Yes. While he has improved, it's still there. He evidently has realized it's wrong, though, because now he tries to hide it from me.

2. Yes and no. He's not an all-entertainment-all-the-time type Dad, but he also has only once in over 1 1/2 years honored my request that we have an occasional weekend together just us. Some weekends he tries to plan activities, or I do, where the whole family can do something together (his kids, my kids, and us). Other weekends he needs to stay home and work on projects and SD just hangs around and whines/complains. To his credit, however, I can see where he sometimes doesn't know what to do because sometimes I'm engaged and sometimes I'm not. Being disengaged usually comes after several weekends in a row being engaged. After being on the receiving end of SD's crap during those weekends, I wind up disengaging again. Also, I think he feels tremendously obligated to fulfill his every weekend duties.

3. I think he would go with me. He sort of thinks his kids are a lost cause, so he would probably put my needs or my kids' needs first. I think he would try to get full physical custody of SD so she could come with. He often talks about moving, but always with the assumption he'd get his kids. Not an unreasonable scenario given their mother's record, but if push came to shove and he didn't get his kids, I think he'd still go with me.

4. Oh, there isn't a number 4. But my number 4 would be how he doesn't do anything about the way SD acts.