Last December DH sent SS17 to live with his mom. He was acting up big time, smoking weed daily, grades were bad, wanting to hang out with the wrong crowd, to add to it, his loser BM would contradict his dad's rules from Florida, we're in California. If his dad would tell him "no you can't hang out with your friend (dope heads); BM would call DH and say "don't expect SS17 home by __, I gave him permission to hang out with friends." Can you believe that shit. DH went to visit (kiss ass) ss17 this weekend and yes, he is desperate to come home -- he wants things back to "normal". What does this mean -- treat me disrespectful and in the meantime demand same privileges as my BD17 who is such a great young woman. I make a lot more then DH and him and the others 2 SSs want me to continue to provide for them even if they're not taking care of business. This year is a big test, when the SS17 comes back, it will be his senior year, my BD17 will also be a senior, I'm going to hold myself together for her to provide a stable home, but once she's off to college, either things change with the SSs, or it's over - 9 years into this and it's still as crazy as ever!