Extremely common especially for kids of divorce. Nice, huh?

How old are these girls? If I would have made assumptions like that growing up, I would've gotten my feelings hurt.

I never make any assumptions that what belongs to my parents belongs to me.

That said, if FDW's daughters helped her with the care of her ailing husband, it would have been nice of her to "share." Of course, it sounds like she did by the way of college and cars. Maybe she should just tell them that WAS their inheritance. }:)

"She didnt EARN all that money, so she shouldnt be saying its all HERS!"

Really SD? but you didnt EARN it either.

When I was doing my legal training, one of my the places I trained worked specifically with wills and inheritance disputes. I remember an old guy shaking his head over a family dispute and muttering, "There's never such a sense of ownership over property as when you haven't worked for it yourself". Never a truer word spoken!

I think that your step daughter is having a really normal reaction to a loved one passing that she didn’t fully care about. I work at a law firm that specializes in Estate Planning and Estate Administration. All of the greedy relatives that couldn’t care less about the person when they were alive come out of the wood work. It is horrible. We had one family that the father choose to leave EVERYTHING to one son, the one son that was always there for him drove him to the doctors, stopped by almost every day to take him out fishing, ect. Well there were three other siblings who were pissed. They actually broke into the home and stole all the valuable tools/equipment that their father owned to sell. The guy who got everything searched the house and found the one thing that he wanted; it was a picture of his mother and father on their wedding day that was in a shadow box with a few small keepsakes in it. He let the scavengers have everything else. Your Step Daughter wont change and all she sees in her mom/you is a potential pay check when you kick the bucket. In hard times you find out who is truly there for you and your Step Daughter is not one of those personalities sorry but she isn’t from what I can tell. You will never be able to make her happy because she has a give me attitude it is sad but it is the truth.

I think (NOT ALL), but a LOT of young people these days feel entitled to everything that belongs to their parents. It is not unheard of for the to discuss their inheritence (as though it is a right), while the parents are still alive. Girls seem to be very greedy in particular when it comes to this.

My husbands daughter actually had the gall to ask her father to pay allthe legal costs in changing over the title of the family home to her and her brothers after mum had died. Now, this family home had been dad's, he had fully paid for it mainted it etc., as mum and the kids never worked a day in their lives. When he left the kids were grown up and had completed their education. So, in fact dad had already given them the house, mum was kind enough to die at a very young age and the house fell to the kids. Unfortunately mum had failed to transfer title to herself as per the divorce agreement, and had not left a will, so this left the kids with some legal costs. These "KIDS" were all working full time, 2 of them had live in partners who were also working full time and all were in their thirties. Yet madam SD screams at her father that he needs to pay for the transfer of title as after all, the kids got nothing out of his divorce so they were entitled to this. Yes she did use the word entitled. Now the actual truth is that the only person who got nothing out of the divorce was my DH and his daughter is well aware of that. He left with the clothes on his back and handed over the house fully paid for, 3 cars (almost new) fully paid for and all the goods and chatels that the house contained. He literally walked out wearing one days clothing. Yet she felt entitled to have him now pay for the transfer of title to her.

Your SD is far from alone in this. You may want to make sure you are protected financially in your new marriage and if you have children that you also make sure your wishes for them are set in cement. Because if FDW were to pass away before you I can assure you this type of SD will make your life a living hell of court dates over every single cent, and this inheritance your FDW received will once again rear its ugly head no matter how many years down the track you are. What is it they say, when a person shows you who they are belive them. Believe this young woman. She has just told you who she is.

UGH. How cn u bear your SS Augusta.

It's amazing that these people have no shame in showing their true colours of entitlement.

My SS27, a couple of years back, rifled through my DH's office, in search of his will. Some months later, he confronted AND reprimanded DH about the contents of his will!!!! Just unbelievable! Then, SS claimed that the will had "just been lying around" so he simply read it (completely not true - who leaves their will lying around at their place of work???). SD then backed SS up on this one claiming that he'd done nothing wrong as it must have just been lying around. Strange, strange people!!

My SD too asked about "her inheritance" a few years ago. We own a small cottage with an even smaller guest cottage one property. She specifically wanted to know who was getting the cottages. I told her, don't worry about the cottages as they will be sold and consolidated to finance our retirement home. You should have seen the look on her face - priceless LOL. They actually are up for sale right now and that is part of the reason she has upped the nastiness and is trying to convince her dad that I need to go. She must think if I go, she'll be better off financially somehow. Not sure how that would work in her mind since I would be taking 1/2 of the assets in case of divorce. Desperation must breed stupidity.

i think this way of feeling entitled is fostered by the "guilty" parent, sometimes. my husband can't see how bitchy and selfish his daughter is. he's completely blind to her. this seems to give her courage when she acts out towards me.
she once told me (as she pointed to her father), "what's his, is mine!"
he didn't say a word so i'm sure she still believes that.

a friend told me i should have said, "well, here's the electric bill. please pay your share!"

i'll remember that for the future...

What these Fathers need to realise is that no matter what emotional hangups their kids have or what caused them....money and possessions wont fix it.

Money ruins everything. My step children constantly talked to their dad while we were married up until the day he died, trying to ensure they would get everything. Now I am going before a judge to make sure that I can remove my possessions from the second home. They've tried to stop me twice!

I think their dad felt guilty. The mother of his kids was unstable and did some damage, and the first stepmother was loved but their breakup was confusing. Then I came along...

Since we have been going through all this crap in the last year of so, I am changing beneficiaries for my money, if there's any left when I die. They will get nothing. I will probably leave some to my granddaughters although they don't speak to me either. In the end, I may just leave most of it to the charity of my choice. That always flattens them, right? My SC will not get a dime.

I know I sound vicious, but I have taken so much crap form them and it's affecting my health. I no longer talk to them, and my atty has asked them to communicate through him. How do I get my email program not to accept their messages? I've seen than mentioned a few times here, but have not ide how to do it.

Different ISPs have different rules, you need to check with your ISP. Some will block, others just have spam filters.

This is such a painful topic because I'm right in the middle of it. My husband died almost 2 years ago after a 20 year marriage. I signed a trust that left the properties (2) to his children when I die. I have a life estate in one of the homes, and I am the trustee of both. I received 1/2 of his pension and he left the money and possessions to me. My problem is that I cannot on my reduced income take care of both (old) homes financially. I offered several deals to them, all of them generous but with some give and take. I packed at least twenty boxes of my husband's mementos for them, including photos of their childhood, etc. I offered and gave them furniture and art. They refuse to make a deal with me and now they want to bar me from taking possessions from the other home. Those things were mine to begin with, things a bought with their dad, things my mother gave me. Consequently I am going to court to have a judge rule on my rights as spelled out in the trust. I am tired of their intimidation and anger and allowing myself to be a doormat. They are both almost 50 years old and there's absolutely no hope of them growing up anytime soon. My SS actually already owns two properties. My SD actually had the nerve to say: My daddy didn't leave me anything. We're talking about property in CA in prime locations. Thanks for listening...

And the peace of mind that attitude will bring you NEWIFE no amount of money could ever buy. You are stuck living with yourself 24/7 from the cradle to the grave so you had damn well like yourself, YOU can be proud and live with yourself in peace unlike the type of people being talked about in this post, while they of course have no conscience, they also have no peace beause they can never get enough of anything from anyone and live a very unhappy life always on the take.

The first words out of my stepdaughters mouth when hubby told her he was choosing us were " Do you have a will?" Hmmm gonna make sure we get one drawn up asap

I didn't read all of the responses, but I'm sure they were all very helpful. When I read your story, I was immediately reminded of a Cosby show episode.

One of the seven children says to the father "we're rich, aren't we Dad?" The father responds "No, your mother and I are rich. Unless you have saved your allowance, you don't have any money."

I realize the show is fictional, and they were a traditional family in the show; however, the message still applies.

Similarly, when I moved into my DH's house, SD21 said she didn't like that I was making any changes to her house. DH responded that he and I pay the mortgage; therefore, it is our house. When SD21 pays the mortgage, SD21 can make whatever changes she wants to make.

It is really not your job to explain this stuff to FSD and could put you in a awkward position. It should be her mother, but it sounds like they aren't seeing things eye to eye. Good luck.