I am annoyed too!
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I come home after work and I had a feeling SD was sneaking my belonging over weekend so I checked her room since she just left this morning and in her desk I find some of my make up , hair products, my mirror , and she even took some candle that she made for me a couple years ago .....I am pissed ...her dad will say something to her when she comes over this week ........I am certain nothing will change with her.
She is 12 she don't live
She is 12 she don't live here but she is here 2 times a week and every other weekend. She lies and now steals from me let the fun begin....not looking forward to next 6 years. I will just have to take inventory on my stuff before and after she leaves...
Damn, I wish i had only 6
Damn, I wish i had only 6 years left..i have 11 years! UGH!! I would definitely call her out on it. When we moved into this house, the girls got their own room and i gave them such a nice piece of furniture to add to their room. Paid alot of money for it years ago..favorite of mine. Dumass that I am, i let them put it in their room to make it look nice and as a nice gesture. Well, one day they were playing around and damaged it AND hid it from me. I only found out weeks later when I saw a part of it hidden in their closet. OOOH I was so pissed off and I let them know it. Took it out their room immediately. I wasn't happy with them for a long time. I know if it were the other way around and one of my kids broke something of theirs, their BM would be like, "you owe me" blah blah blah. Don't let her start stealing now and getting away with it. It'll just start it off, next will be $$$ right out of your wallet.
you are right there i too
you are right there i too have went above and beyond trying with this skid and get little or no thanks at all then the kid takes her old present back from me that she made... what a brat. i will let her dad handle this i done before and she still dont listen he can talk with her.
i already removed my back stock of health and beauty supplies from the bathroom its not like they need to be in there anyway just left the bare essentials so when she comes over and sees that nothing is there anymore i hope it makes her feel like the little thief she is.
my really personal stuff that i keep in a case in the cabinet will just have to remove when she is over... i think i might even make a point to go remove that stuff just before she walks in i should say wait a min i gotta get something before you use bathroom and walk out with my makeup case.....
When my fSD was 12, she did
When my fSD was 12, she did similar things. Stole make-up, clothes, even thong underwear that her BM didn't let her wear! Drove me crazy. Turned out it had more to do with wanting to grow up and do "mature" things (like wear make-up) than it actually had to do with me. I think most women wore their mother's clothes/make-up and when she is at your house, whether you have a good relationship or not, you're the "mother" figure.
Stop taking it so personally, (even though I realize it is infuriating to have your items missing) and maybe take her to the store to buy her some of her own make-up. Tell her that if she wants to borrow something of yours, she just needs to tell you, but also that you're allowed to say "no." Calling her a thief and a liar will only make the problem worse. Try to get to the root of why she is stealing your things.
I am also not saying that there shouldn't be consequences. One of the make-up items she stole from me was really expensive, and so she had a list of chores to do that I thought added up to $40. Also had a discussion about why it is GROSS to share make-up.
Like I said, probably has nothing to do with you, and everything to do with trying to keep up with the kids at school. She is probably too afraid to ask for things, and stealing seems easier.
Oh I know all that I think
Oh I know all that I think it's natural for girls to "need" things and take . But when kids take from a bio parent and bio parent can yell or whatever cause they have good relationship and have more to work with its different. But when a skid who u have no relationship with does it and u can't yell cause then u look evil yet again it's different. It's just had being step parent cause you are damned if you do and damned if you don't and skids never have to work at the relationship. It's a two way street . We sorta work out tonight see my new post