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Knowing what you know now, would you do it again?

Mylilmonsters's picture

Would you marry someone with children now that you have experienced everything that comes with skids?

SMof2Girls's picture

^this

I'm not quite on the opposite end of it all yet, but we've done pretty well so far .. and I love my DH to pieces!

But if something were to happen and we split up, I don't know that I'd have the energy or patience to start all over again with a new guy + kids.

RedWingsFan's picture

Yes, definitely but only because he didn't allow stepdevil to rule our relationship and he put our marriage first. If he hadn't, I would've walked a long time ago.

dledden's picture

ONLY if the remarriage came with NO SKIDS, or GROWN SKIDS who I didn't have to raise in my house.

BSgoinon's picture

Yes. I would do it all over again. Every moment. But my DH has always put our marriage first. And my SS is a very good kid.

herewegoagain's picture

NEVER.

Anne Boleyn's picture

I would only marry someone who had grown kids or almost out the door, who had very little interaction with the BM and I would be very watchful of the relationship with those kids. At my age (early 40s), there is really no one around who has no kids.And I don't know that I'd want to be with someone who doesn't understand parenthood at all.

oldone's picture

I dated men with children (never met them) but never would have married a man with a minor child.

DH's youngest was well into his 20s and out of the home (permanently) before i started dating him. I would not have looked at him twice if he'd had a child of any age living in his home.

Although I'd been living with my father for several years before I met DH. But that was a matter of me taking care of a 90 year old man. I really did not date while I had that responsibility.

christinen's picture

HELL NO. I don't even have kids so I certainly should not be putting up with all the skid crap I have to deal with for being with someone who has a child.

If DH and I don't work out, I would make previous children a dealbreaker.

hereiam's picture

I would do it again with my DH but if something happened to him, I sure as hell would not do it again with another man with minor children. If his kids were adults, I would have to really get to know them to be sure they are not like the ones I read about on here!

emotionaly beat up's picture

Honestly guys, so many of you say you'd only marry a guy with kids again if the kids were adults. STAY WELL AWAY from adult kids. They are just bigger versions of the spoilt little brats you dread. They also worry themselves senseless over daddy's money and their inheritance. Little kids, little problems. Big kids, big problems. Then these adults have babies and now you have even more problems. Adult steps can be far, far worse, especially daddy's little princess can do no wrongs.

fedup13's picture

ABSOFREAKINGLUTELY NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO NO NO NO NO. Worst mistake I ever made, no matter how much I love DH, so not worth this.

stepmotherwhy's picture

NOOO

Only positive is my bio children. Hate having DH's son around.

I warn all my friends not to get involved with someone with kids.

DONT DO IT!

poetrygul's picture

I always said I would never date a man with children even though now I'm in the situation where my man might have a child if we break up..... I'm never going to walk into a relationship with a man why would he has a child I'm not going to do that...... a lot of things come along with that including the emotional stress on the children that you will have and children that he already has.... the things I've seen with my own eyes and the things that I've read on this form I have been right in my life to not date aman with children..... and from what I'm going to right now I'm definitely never going to do this again I don't even know if I
want to get married just from the emotional things that are going with that and then add children on to it oh no

omgsaveme's picture

Like others say I have a bio with my DH and love my DD and I have 3 BS's who love DH to death. If say we were just basing it solely off his SD HELL to the NO once I saw how he was with her and when he told me " you know my DD will always come first right" um good luck with that one.

Kasey21's picture

I love DH but my answer is NO, who would want this madness if we knew in advance??? Crazy bitch BM stalking me out of jealousy and rage, I didnt see this coming.

SMof2's picture

I think this is a very hard question. I love my husband more than anything. But honestly don't like his children at all. I love them and try my best to be as supportive if him and his parenting decision as possible. But if I actually could get a glimpse of life now I might have let true love get away out of fear of dealing with what I'm dealing with. Sad but true, I would have passed up on this wonderful mannhad I known how awful his children were. I feel bad even saying this because I really can't imagine life without him. But my skids make me want to leave sometimes. Sad
I make sure I let people know the truth and tell them that if you marry a man with children and you have none it will be one of the most difficult things you can do in life.

dledden's picture

if DH dies before me and skid is still a minor, skid goes back to grandparents, not with me, no way in hell. disclosed that long before we ever got married: you DIE, skid GOES BYE BYE!

hippiegirl's picture

I would be with DH, but would say NOOOOOO to his ex wife's kids living with us. I always tell my daughters to stay away from divorced men with kids. Stay away from all men with kids. Not worth the hassle. Not worth the financial strain.