HIS house,the one he lived in with the EX
So my husband and I live in HIS house(this is how he describes it). This is the house he bought with his ex-wife and raised his children into the bratty 11 and 12 year olds they are. My issue...when we got married we discussed selling this house...cause who wants to live in the house their spouse bought with an ex...Yuck like sleeping in a bed froma previous marriage. So, I finally get husband to put house on the market ...BM on the other hand has taken all of the CS and secion 8 and has moved into a really nice apartment 1 hour away.
So now 1 year on the market, and hardly any viewings in the last 6 months and 3 different realtors...the house is not sold. I want out it is such a bad vibe in this house, we need ,more room, and the house is a money pit (just replaced the entiring plumbing and need to replace the eletricl among many other things). My husband is angry since I said he should just walk away from the house it will never sale for whathe paid and I'm not putting one more dime into it. What would you all do? I'm miserable and I just don't want to be there anymore.
You can't make a house be
You can't make a house be sold. Your DH put the house up for sale, there's nothing else he can do. Telling him to walk away from the house when he's not upside down is not good financial decision.
This will impact his credit score and affect his ability to buy another house.
One reason a house may not be selling is that price is too high. If ya'll really want to get rid of the house, look at what other homes in the area are selling for and reduce the sales price to match.
He is upside down. The house
He is upside down. The house is being sold and worth half od what he bought it for. None of the houses in the neighborhood are selling anywhere close to where he needs to sell this house.
Then you need to ride out the
Then you need to ride out the real estate slump. It ebbs and flows. Take it off the market and find a real estate agent that is GOOD. Not ok, they need to be selling 2-3 homes a month.
Because you don't like the house doesn't mean he needs to let his home foreclose. That is ridiculous. Maybe you need to shake whatever is getting at you regarding this home.
I understand your feelings,
I understand your feelings, but please don't ask your DH to walk away fro mthe house. The housing market in our area really sucks right now, but that's a huge investment to just up and walk away from.
I think I'm in the minority on this board, but I live in the house DH and BM lived in once, and it doesn't bother me at all. There's nothing in there that's hers, and I redecorated completely to make it mine. Hac\ve you done that? If the decorating or furnishings scream "BM," I'm sure it would be really difficult. Besides, when they were married and she lived here, it was just a HOUSE. Now, we've made it a HOME.That's something it never was before. Even though your goal is to get rid of the house, maybe changing things up would help you feel more comfortable in the meantime? Good luck on selling! I hope it happens for you soon.
Redecorated, repainted, none
Redecorated, repainted, none of the same furniture. But he will never recoop his investment. He's upside down in mortgage and he and ex took out a second mortgage which has not been paid back yet. HE paying that. Whomever sold him this house ripped him off ...no house in the area is selling anywhere close to what we would need to be close to paying this loan off.
Oh, and did I mention
Oh, and did I mention everything is falling apart...new plumbing we need new electric the central air needs to be replaced we purchased and new furnase and fixed the gutters. There are alos several violations that need to be addressed outside(driveway, winmdows, and stairs).It's really a waste of money.
The house had to have
The house had to have appraised at what it was worth (at the time) in order for a bank to loan him the money.
I live in the house of DH's
I live in the house of DH's ex. It is working fine for me. But, I completely re-decorated and have completely re-done the yard and added windows and new doors. The house doesn't look the same. Got rid of almost all of his furniture. Have taken down pics of SD from hell and have made it my home.
It works, but only because he supported those changes. We fought over a lot of them, but ultimately, I won, because he knew I needed it in order to be happy here. But, I also, expect him to understand it was her house and I am here because it works out financially and also, because our sons best friends are two houses down. But, we are moving into the city in three years as soon as my SS goes to college. He knows it and understands I am tired of running into the BM in the next neighborhood....
Make it your own and you will feel better, but walking away from a house, will destroy your credit and not the right answer.
I also live in the house of
I also live in the house of DH's ex. It is not my first choice but after 5 years it is ok.
The thing I hate now is her still living in the neighborhood and taking the chance of running into her every time I leave the house. :sick:
We completely remodeled the house. We re-painted EVERY room and I redecorated inside and out.
You can do alot of big changes with a little of money. I brought some of my stuff (pre-marriage) and we replaced most everything in the house with OUR stuff.
I agree with Ghost. The ex might have lived in the house but now it is OUR HOME!
Don't expect to be comfortable there at first. It will take time to make it feel like YOUR home.
Don't expect to be comfortable there with HER stuff surrounding you. Get rid of her junk. Even if you have to buy and sell on Craigslist.
My DH would never just walk away from the house but I like the rental house idea.
Do not let it be foreclosed
Do not let it be foreclosed on - it is harder to recover from that then dealing with fixing it enough to be rented, or y'all living in it.
I have never lived in the house DH bought when he was with BM but I feel the percussion of what happened to it. He moved out when he left her and offered to give her the house and even pay the mortgage in lieu of part of child support because she wanted it, the house was starting to have foundation issues and she decided she didn't want it after it had been agreed by the courts...and turns out the money he was giving her to help live on after he left she didn't pay the mortgage so in the end by the courts in their divorce hearing it was filed that since he didn't want the house and with her refusing to live in it because of "bad memories" because of stuff that got brought up denying her additional support the house had to be given back to the bank and foreclosed on he had no choice. We are not renting and EVERYTHING has to be in my name because of credit issues, in fact over the weekend we got a collection notice she had also not paid the final electrical bill that was in HIS name and he had no clue that it had not gotten paid because like I said after he left he gave her more than enough for all household bills, SS5 and her son from another father.
I know it has to be painful but there are so many other solutions...keep your head up - as suggested remodel, or rent even if you still have to do repairs in the long run if you don't want to be pinned in the situation I am living it is better to deal.
My boyfriend did live in his
My boyfriend did live in his house with his ex, but it was just a rental. I kind of lit a fire under his butt, to re order his finances. I told him, at his age, there is no reason not to own his own home. With his permission, I sat down with him and we went over his finances and found places where it could be done.It took about two years to actually get it to happen.
However we still have the same bed,... one battle at a time, believe me, the bed is the next thing to go.