DON'T MESS WITH MY MAN!!!
I am having a hard timing dealing with the behavior of my skids. I get so angry when they do something to my husband and he then feels bad. For instance my ss has intentionally not invited my husband to his soccer games.The skid hates correction adn like any father my hubby will give him little pointer and tips since he played and my skid hates it. So he stopped giving him the schedule and telling him about games. In addition the skid is a huge cry baby. He plays basketball and any time he misses a shot or travels he actually cries(he's not as good as he thinks). In addition my step daughter will play their mom and my hubby against one another. Making up lies, or asking her for persmission when dad has already said no. This is so manipulative and mom falls for it everytime( she's a terrible mother).
I find myself angry and not wanting to do or be bothered with the skids for hurting my love. I have to live with him while he is hurting and sad they don't. I have to deal with the aftermath and they don't. How do you all deal with this. I hate that they hurt him so much and don't care, and I can't do anything about it.
I feel the same way. I'm the
I feel the same way. I'm the one that has to live with a man that is continually hurt my his kids and taken advantage of (not as much as yrs ago) by his ex. I used to get so angry for SO's sake.
I had to realize that this situation, good or bad, is his. I will listen to him when he complains about them but I don't let it emotionally drain me anymore. I'm not the one that chose BM to be the mother of his children.
I still feel bad for him when he gets his feeling hurt but I have let all the anger go.
I have the same pain.
I have the same pain. Watching that kid emotionally slice up my husband is torture. When you figure it out, forward the answer to me asap.
She also used to slice up her little brother. But I personally put a stop to that and my dh supported me. So, happily, her behavior toward her little brother has changed at our house. She knows she won't get away with it. Funny how that works, eh? But it is hard to enforce the boundaries of another adult, the person who is the actual parent, when that adult won't enforce them himself. I've come to understand he really doesn't know how to nor does he understand how important it is for HER that he do so. He would rather just suck up the pain somehow thinking he's doing the right thing.
Ditto. Let me know when you
Ditto. Let me know when you figure out how to disengage from THESE feelings. I am totally po'do that adult skids are so shitty to their dad (unless of course they need something ) and even tho not my circus or monkeys still riles me. I dunno maybe I have ocd. . .
I don't even wan the little
I don't even wan the little demons around their dad anymore. No matter what he does hes the evil one. They told us they hate to see us at their sporting events and won't acknowledge us at all. I'm tired of seeing him hurt bc their bm tells teaches them to act this way.
Do you worry he will resent
Do you worry he will resent you later?
I don't think my sds will
I don't think my sds will figure it out either. BM has them totally brainwashed. He says BM has been turning them against him since the twins were born. It's said bc he is a wonderful man. However, I'm glad they aren't here and dread the day they ever do come back. Wish I didn't have to see them in public.
THIS It sounds like dad is
THIS
It sounds like dad is acting like a baby.
Yep, Dad isn't handling the
Yep, Dad isn't handling the sport thing right. I'm CP to two very active kids and they've been doing sports since age 4. So I figured out by trial and error and other "experts" that kids don't want to hear everything they are doing wrong after a game. Duh, right? Every kid is different. I figured my son worked well off of hearing all the great things he did, and then I'll ask him something like, "Can you tell me anything you need to work on?" and if his assessment is the same as mine, we talk about it and move on. Now that he is 13 and trusts my assessment of his performance, he isn't as uptight about it, and he knows the routine. BUT...I'm the CP and see him ALL the time. We have that relationship. I practice these sports with him. I taught him a lot of what he knows. A NCP who is barely around doesn't need to say ANYTHING critical, especially if he wasn't there to help beforehand. My exh has come to the last game of soccer season (the ONLY game he came to) and criticized the coaches about what they should have taught them, or what they should know. It drives me nuts. If Dad isn't there to put the work in with the kid, he can't say anything. Period.
i stood by and watched two
i stood by and watched two sds play their father like a fiddle. they live out of state so hed call each week for his visitation. they would screen his calls and then beg them to call him. bm never even asked them to come to the phone.
he looked weak when he begged and i am sure bm and the two skids laughed about it. of course hands were open where money was concerned.