Feels great! When I met husband he was making $400 a month after he paid support and was driving a rusted out 1985 civic. Told him to take that "extra money" and buy himself a car HE wants. He's always gotten practical cars that fit our family. Now he's going to get a car he wants! And he deserves it. The man works hard and has been treated badly for the past 16 years by them!

Does it come in a convertible?!?

UPDATE: in laws just called and they have hit them up for money for college. The same in laws that bm terrorized for years, and who took her to court and sued for grandparents visitation, and won. My fil is a calm, steady, man...I suspect he's going to be very diplomatic, but still cutting through the bullshit if ya know what I mean. I know she's gonna qualify for a plethora of grants. If not, then she can get loans like the rest of us little people. I have 25000 in student loan debt so I have zero sympathy there. It stinks but I'm not adding to my debt so you can go to school with no worries. I also served in the military ang got gi bill...you want it bad enough you make sacrifices. Anyway, he probably won't say no but there will be gates and expectations that those women will not want to bear. They just want cash in hand with no questions asked. Friggin unbelievable!

Tog I agree with you! Told hubs that too but baby steps. Like I said, if we had millions in savings it would still be a big fat NO! And she knows we recently donated a vehicle to charity too. I'd rather help a stranger trying to get back on her feet then them, quite honestly. Because we got a heartfelt thank you for the van and it's appreciated. I'm so evil! }:)

This explains why bm didn't call us shrieking like a banshee like she typically would. She didn't want to burn bridges just yet.

Father in law responded to sd about her pleas for money for college. He was polite and straight forward. Said that there are grants and scholarships that will cover most, if not all, of her college costs. That she did well academically and and there is money out there for kids like her who are smart and driven to get an education. That she is a good person and a hard worker. He'd be happy to be a reference for her, but they hadn't planned or expected to put her through school and therefore the money isn't there. Btw, they have 12 grand kids total...haven't covered college for any of them, nor would we ask! So I guess her panhandling (which we believe bm was behind anyway, because she took all the proceeds from student aid after tuition was paid and it was deposited into HER account, none of which oldest sd got) didn't work out for her. }:)

Another update, sad to say! So husband gets a text saying "Hey dad, in order to go to my school of choice I am going to need to put down 500 dollars for the dorms and that's before I get any aid or scholarships. I was wondering if you could help me with it, with even half. Please:)" and he responded with "i know that you really want to go to School of choice, but throwing this all together short notice may not be your best choice. I would recommend that you re-look community college this semester, apply for more scholarships, and get all your ducks in a row to go to school of choice in spring 2014. This will give you time to get your stuff in for the November 1st School of choice scholarship deadline, and get some of your general studies courses out of the way. I love you and am very proud of your determination to get your education going."
So we called school of choice, which was also my school of choice, by the way, and, she's on a waiting list for dorms. No money is due at this time. If she's offered a room, which may or may not happen, it's a $400 payment, NOT $500. Just a $100 fudge on her part but its telling. Here's the thing. My husband (and me) have supported the sd's exclusively for 13 of the 17 years of the divorce. Bm can't hold a job, on welfare, going to school, whatever. Bm got her masters this past year. For free. Super! Now it's YOUR TURN to support the kids. GET A JOB! And either way, sd qualifies for every need based grant in the state because mom has been on welfare for years. So you have to front the $400. You'll recoup that PLUS SOME when you get the proceeds of your student aid. Sd has a summer job, too, along with grad money she was given.
On top of that, there is a difference of $300 between community college and school of choice (which she just sprung on us two weeks ago, anyway) if you don't have the means, you do what a zillion other kids do. You transfer when you get it together. No shame in community college! My student loan debt would be so much more manageable had I been wise and knocked out general studies at a community college!
I really and truly wish her every success. I hope this makes her hungry, ya know? Because my dad made six figures (we don't!) and didn't pay for my college. It's his money and his prerogative...so I joined the armed services to help me with my education. I was hungry, you see. I didn't go panhandling, especially when my student aid more than covered my expenses. On top of all this, theres also the issue of oldest sd when she went to school. bm claimed poverty, cried "we need money" and bm's brother and sister in law paid all the tuition to community college. come to find out sd got a ton of student aid, and all the proceeds were sent to bm. Bm and sd's have refused to nurture any kind of relationship with us (unless they need something) The bm and sd's constantly dog him out. Yet he's still supposed to give freely and without question. All of his no saying has probably thrown them for a loop! Bm is so used to being able to take him to court whenever she wanted to (total control) to having no control over us. It kills her that it is entirely our decision. And the sd has been taught that she's entitled and its dad's job to pay.