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Money Issues

whatamess's picture

Submitted by whatamess on Wed, 10/02/2013 - 11:45am

Forums: 
Adult Stepchildren

I have not spoken or seen my Skids but only a handful of times the past year. I emotionally disengaged a few months ago which has made all the difference. My DH is re-establishing a relationship with Queen Bee...SD...who controls the other 2. There are 5 out of 7 birthdays during the summer. This includes their SO's and 1 GS too. Over that time, DH has spent at least $1000 on their birthday presents and we have 1 bday and Christmas to go. I am livid. I have not asked one single thing about what he's done for any of their bdays because I try not to ask any questions about any of them. I know he goes overboard on the money he gives them so I figured I'm better off not knowing. Well, this info has recently come to light and I can't pretend to ignore it any longer. It reminds me of StepAside's recent thread that was something to the effect of "how much is peace worth?" Up until today, I was willing to suck it up and keep my mouth shut over whatever he spent because at least I don't have to see them. However, I'm scrimping and saving and doing without things I want for us to save money and he's giving these ungrateful brats this kind of money???? I just really needed to vent because I am super pissed and thinking about going on a major shopping spree today. Why the hell should I be the only one worried about money??? UGH!

lil_lady's picture

Submitted by lil_lady on Wed, 10/02/2013 - 12:45pm

This drives me crazy and its really the only thing aside from parenting views sometimes that we fight about. I have started paying off my debt with any extra money I have if I have extra after that then I treat myself or put it in our savings. I also try to remind SO of the fact that I am doing this. He has gotten 10 x better. I am not sure if it is because we are expecting and he realizes a home we actually own would be nice or the fact that I seem to pay off my stuff more then he does. It is getting better though.

Willow2010's picture

Submitted by Willow2010 on Wed, 10/02/2013 - 12:47pm

Recently found out there are a few "secret" savings accounts
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I would have a serious issue with this!

farmers wife's picture

Submitted by farmers wife on Sat, 10/05/2013 - 7:11am

Do they ever learn that guilt spending won't buy love, when they don't admit it's guilt? That it just leads to expecting more and appreciating less, and feeling entitled to it?

Mine has found ways behind my back to give thousands this year alone, but he doesn't see the problem. It does affect our home but he just doesn't see a problem. Royal SS deserves it.

Ugh, I feel for all of you in this mess.

Echo, I'm quoting you on this to DH "If it's important to you, you'll find a way. If it's not, you'll find an excuse."