SD invites BF to live in our basement
I came home from a business trip and noticed a bunch of oil stains on the street in front of my house. Seems that after living in our basement w/her 2 baby SGKs for 18 mo, SD24 invited her latest "BF" to stay with her. DW thinks its wonderful - "how is she supposed to meet people?" They met at the daycare center - one day when SD went to pick up her 6mo son, this guy was holding him. He doesn't work there, he was there to pick up his own kids. Now "Bubba" (that's all we know about him) is staying here unti 0430. I told DW I didn't want him living here and spending the night - she says he isn't doing either. Of course we have to feed him, and when he brings his young kids over (supposedly he is separated from his GF, wife, whatever, we don't know!) they run thru the house like wild animals. Again DW thinks that is OK. This went on for 6 months before DW had me evicted for being mean to her - I was just expressing my disgust with the situation, there was a lot of yelling on my part but nothing more. Anyway, problems with this SD finally casued the end of my marriage.
Was I wrong to not want this man who I knew nothing about staying in my house?
You weren't wrong. You were
You weren't wrong. You were wrong for letting her in and not standing up for yourself. Did you pay anything to the household? If so, you have every right to kick adult kids out of the house.
Your dw needs to get her head
Your dw needs to get her head out of her ass.
OMG! I just had a mental
OMG! I just had a mental vision of this happening in my house! That scares the hell out of me for sure. You weren't wrong in not wanting to take care of another freeloader. And not knowing anything about him....heck no! Geez, I hope the SD is on birth control otherwise I foresee another grandchild on the way. It's awful that this SD has wrecked your marriage. I feel for you. How long had you and your wife been together?
We had known each other since
We had known each other since high school in the early 70s but had only been married for 2 1/2 years. Bubba ended after about 6 months, but not before DW had me evicted. After we got back together, DW bought SD a house, and DW pays the $1500 mortgage on it. After living there for about 3 years, another old BF od the SD (who lives on the other side of the country) came and stayed w/ SD for 30 days. Nine months later out pops #3, and of course the babydaddy has never been seen again. I feel for my new ex, she is caught up in enabling this useless (but steadily employed) SD. We are in our late 50s, and with the now 31 yo SD, GK2, GK6, and GK11 to support, I just don't see any time for us in the future. I can see who is going to have to pay these kids way to college, but them cars, support THEIR kids - no light at the end of this tunnel.
Of course you were not
Of course you were not wrong. Good riddance to being out that toxic cesspool IMHO.
Congratulations on your new begining.
Have fun and take care of yourself.
Don't sweat your XW's obviously shallow and polluted gene pool.
DW WHAT THE HECK ! My moto is
DW WHAT THE HECK ! My moto is no adult children living with us. Me and my FDH agreed to this before I said yes to marry him. I said I'll help pay for an apartment. I raised my children and now I want my own freedoms. Love my kidos and they can come visit us any time they want. I'm really sorry that sucks big time !
No. Good for you for not
No. Good for you for not putting up with it and getting out of that nuthouse! I told my DH that his adult kids moving into our house would be the end of our relationship. Not my fault he chose not to wear a condom. Twice.
under the laws of many
under the laws of many states, if a person stays at your house--rental agreement or not--they are considered legal residents of your home.
your wife was totally clueless. consider yourself lucky and free of the wife and her daughter. they would cause more headaches down the road.
dont feel bad.