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BM isn't a hero...

mixedemotionsaboutstepdaughter's picture

How many of you have heard BM brag on her child acting as though they were "Mother Of The Year", when in fact you KNOW she is a lazy, no good, worthless piece of worm dung?! I don't make it a habit to hang around BM by any means, but I have attended school functions for SD when BM was there...and I happened to hear BM say, "That's my baby! I'm SO proud of her!" Blah, blah, blah. It makes me want to vomit! :sick:

My SD's BM is nearing 50, has 4 children (by at least 3 different BD's, if not 4)...has been married and divorced at least 3 times, if not more. Her oldest was put in prison for stealing my DH's vehicle (and numerous other charges), her 2nd to the oldest has had a long history of drug/alcohol abuse and dropped out of High School until she was finally taken in by BM's sister and straightened out, her 3rd child lives with her but looks like she starves herself and constantly has her face in the mirror, and the youngest...my SD...mimics all but the oldest in her behavior. Obviously SD doesn't have drug/alcohol issues (YET), but behavioral issues for sure. So...BM is DEFINITELY not the epitomy of a great Mother by any form of the imagination!

And some question why I have such hatred and disgust towards this person. No, she hasn't done anything to me...but for someone who claims to be a "Christian" and wants everyone to believe she's such a great person, she is way beyond delusional! I got SO MAD at my DH, when BM moved back to the state we live in and divorced her husband, because he actually helped her get a job. I asked him why he's bothering to help her at all, and he said it was because of his daughter. He's only trying to help ensure his daughter is taken care of. He could give two craps less about BM.

I'm not perfect, I admit. But, I did give my children a good home and a good life. I cared for them, was involved with them, and they have grown into good young men.

Grace Galloway's picture

I hear you sister! That urks me too!

My stepkids BM swears she is Mother of the Year too and I find it to be extremely offensive and sickening. She gives herself all the credit behind SD19 turning out to be such a good kid. SD was salutatorian of her graduating class, got a partial academic scholarship to a university and has been overall a good kid, not much trouble at all. BM always boasts about her daughter (which is fine, I get that she's proud, so am I) however she always throws in the "I worked so hard to get SD to where she is today" comment. Byatch PLEASE! BM didnt do any of that work, SD did! I'm sure BM encouraged her just as everyone else did but to give yourself all the credit is rediculous!

To make matters worse, BM doesnt work, never has held a long term job, has spent her entire adulthood mooching off of her family and has never been responsible. She is resourceful thats for sure cuz she's managed to stay afloat on everyone else's dime. She's even told me that she doesnt feel comfortable having her other kids live with us because she's afraid their needs will not get met. LOL. REally? Without DH's money, none of their needs would ever be met first of all. Secondly she's never home, she is always busy running around. She told me she's a mama bear and very protective of her kids and she will fight to the death for them.

Well, as soon as SD took off for college, BM has been on a mission to complete her education and was inspired to move away too for college. So Mom of the Year has abandoned her 2 other son's (SS13 & SS17) and left them with us full time so she can go to college 500 miles away. What mom of the year does that? LOSER! By the time she graduates and even starts getting her ish together, all of her kids will be grown and out of the house. I still dont understand why she chose to go to school far away when our city has tons of universities to attend.

mixedemotionsaboutstepdaughter's picture

That is ridiculous! But, that's great to hear how your SD is doing! Good for her! She can get out there and do something positive for herself! And, your SS's are better off with you anyway!

My DH made the comment to me that BM said if it weren't for her kids she'd still be married to the guy she recently divorced! (Because the guy is career military and demanded respect and manners from BM's children! So, the children didn't like him.) Why in the F would you agree to marry a guy that you SHOULD KNOW is going to be rigid and have standards?! Just like she did with my DH, she was grasping at straws...trying to find SOME man to take her and her kids in so she wouldn't have to work! LOSER!!!!!

SugarSpice's picture

being a bm is overrated. bm in my case used child support on herself and second husband. no small trust for the children as dh begged her to do.

Calypso1977's picture

my fiance tried so hard to negotiate putting a portion of CS each month into a trust for SD13 that he would manage, knowing that BM (and her family members) cant save and have tons of money problems. She refused. she could EASILY provide for SD on one half of the CS amount as she has zero living expenses.

SugarSpice's picture

no justice in this. dh spent for most of expenses like medical and dental. dh begged for money to be saved for the children. no such luck. every year new cars and bigger houses.

Anon2009's picture

Tbh I've never had that. Bm doesn't come to school events or make any effort for her kids.

Try to take some comfort in knowing that the people she says that to/in front of likely see right through her and her act.

mixedemotionsaboutstepdaughter's picture

You're right! BM is the proverbial "Black Sheep" of her family anyway. She made her bed...

Calypso1977's picture

according to mutual friends, on facebook BM is always posting things about "My wonderful daughter" and "im so proud of who she is becoming" and "she is my whole world".

its nauseating! and sad, that BM is proud that her daughter is behind in school, dresses like a slut, and hasnt got the brains god gave a goose and is void of any discipline or structure. yeah, id be reeeallll proud BM.

AllySkoo's picture

Gotcha beat...

SD17 moved in with us to get out of her mom's house, and promptly found out she was pregnant. (DH actually thinks she did it on purpose.) SD17 wanted to move in with Baby Daddy, so DH (with my enthusiastic support) told her "no way in hell". BM - Mother of the Year - says, "If you move back in with me I'll let your boyfriend live with us." Off she went.

BUT WAIT!

Two months later (this past weekend, in fact), BM gets pissed off that Baby Daddy isn't "contributing" to the household (he's 23, wasn't paying rent). SD17 tells BM that the apartment is crap, that BM is crap, whatever and BM slaps her and throws her out of her house! So now... she's living with Baby Daddy at his grandmother's. Exactly what we were trying to prevent (Baby Daddy is bad news, and emotionally abusive at the least). Because BM was Mother of the Fucking Year and couldn't keep herself from interfering.

And meanwhile she's posting crap on Facebook about how "proud" she is of her fucking seventeen year old, not out of high school yet daughter giving her another grandchild.

I could kill her, seriously.

SugarSpice's picture

that is because they were able to get by on their gonads so why shouldnt their daughters.

AllySkoo's picture

Oddly, she was less pleased when SD20 (then 19) got pregnant. Although she did tell her, in regards to marrying the guy who got her pregnant, "Don't add a mistake to an accident." It's almost like... it's great if they get pregnant, as long as there's no chance of a long term relationship. (I don't think there's much chance for SD17's to be "forever", especially once the baby comes. He's inherently too selfish to stand for the competition of affection. God I hope it's a boy. He will be a horrid father to a girl.)

blayze's picture

BM over here takes credit for EVERYTHING that her kids do, including the kid who has never lived with her. Any possible way to get attention on Fakebook because her life is such a friggin mess. Starting a sentence with "MY {kid's name} did XYZ...Mama's SO proud of you!!!" :sick: