Wiping a six year olds bottom?
This sounds ridiculous, but as most of you know, the most ridiculous things become an issue when you are in a blended family!
To keep it short, this is the basic issue. Bio-mom spoils the crap out of SD6. When SD6 is with bio-mom, she demands something, ie, "I want juice!", and bio-mom hops up and fetches. When SD6 has a bowel movement (goes poop), she believes it is somebody elses job to wipe her arse because bio-mom does that for her too. (a short bit of back-ground - bio-mom is a jobless swine who lives off of DH's child support and her new husband, and EI between her minimum wage occasional jobs, and lives in a small apartment which is rarely cleaned so she has time to play slave I suppose. I work full-time in a very stressful healthcare job, AND have two other kids, and a house to care for... ie: very little spare time)
Now I have my own daughter. BD6 wipes her own arse and has been for at least a year and a half now. BD6 also knows that if she wants something I am happy to get it for her. "Mom may I please have some juice" works like a charm every time. Basic manners are very important in our household.
Long story short, at what age did you all stop wiping your children's bums? DH says "she is still very young", but I am thinking that when they start grade one next year, nobody is going to wipe their butts for them there, so she better start figuring it out! Tell me I am not wrong?!
Also, am I pushing it to
Also, am I pushing it to demand basic manners, like please and thank-you be used? I am not asking anything from SD that I don't expect from my own bio-kids!
She's old enough to wipe her
She's old enough to wipe her own arse But as long as someone is doing it she probably has no reason to start doing it her self ...have you tried getting her to try doing this by herself ?
Yes. I have refused, and she
Yes. I have refused, and she can and will do it herself if I refuse. But DH said "She is still little..." as if I am being a bully, so I am confirming that I am absolutely right! lol
Ha well obviously she isn't
Ha well obviously she isn't "too" little since she will do it herself if she has too...stick what your doing
Tell your husband to wipe his
Tell your husband to wipe his daughter's ass. See how long that lasts.
He does it! He is a very
He does it! He is a very commited, loving father which is usually a great thing, because we have a daughter together and he treats BD6 like his own too, but this is crossing the line IMO. Wiping a 6 year olds poopy behind is ridiculous, and I have had to tell him not to do it anymore. If bio-mom needs to do that, let her, but in my home it has become a hard and fast rule as of today that nobody wipes anybody elses bum. lol Well except my 1 year old. She still needs an extra bit of help.
My SO has 2 boys. When we met
My SO has 2 boys. When we met they were turning 6 and 8. In the summer when the younger kid turned 7, his parents were still wiping his ass. I said something about as SO was on his way to wipe a dirty butt at my family function we were at in front of people and that was the last of it. No more bum wiping by SO after that! In fact, I remember hearing SO (it was at a cabin... walls didn't go up to the ceiling) I heard him telling the younger kid he's too old to whine and say he can't. He was well past the age and ability to do it alone. Someone else mentioned it... if someone is doing it for them, they sure as heck won't do it themselves!!
Hand washing on the other hand seems to be a non-stop, never ending battle.
My Sd is also 6, for the most
My Sd is also 6, for the most of the time she wipes it herself, she does have a bit of tummy trouble sometimes, so I ask her to shout for me, if she gets in a mess, then I wash her bum for her, other than that she would be fine to wipe it herself all the time, I also insist on Sd asking for things nicely, its a simple choice, ask for it nicely or you don't get it, her mother sounds a bit like your Sd's mother, she thinks that Sd is too young to learn manners, even though she is only with us for 3 days a week, we really have made a big positive impact on her, her manners are lovely now and she understands that she is far more likely to get what she wants if she uses them.
every once in a while, my
every once in a while, my bioson 6 will ask me to come 'help him' wipe in the bathroom, like if there's no wet wipes in the tub and he has to rely on dry paper only. normally i'll just go get some more wipes from the closet and let him be on his way. Also he's my BIOSON, I have no trouble, for example, when he's sick and shits himself and pukes and stuff, cleaning up after him.
Stepson 8 has a horribly dirty ass. I will NEVER wipe him, it completely skeeves me. He's not my kid, that SHIT has no biology that came from my belly....no way in HELL i'm goin near that.
Don't wipe the stepkids ass. let her walk around with shit stuck in her hiney hole....that's gotta get itchy and uncomfortable.....LOL
My SS6 didn't wipe his own
My SS6 didn't wipe his own ass when DH and I started going out (he was 4), and he STILL CANNOT DO IT PROPERLY NOW! I'm glad to see I'm not the only one floored by this! It is ridiculous, even WITH wet wipes his underwear are consistently gross and skid marked and he is forever digging in his butt. I have a baby now (BIO son is 4 mos.) and I refuse to wipe 3/4 of the asses in my household! I think it is fully the BM's fault, it was in our case. I was wiping my own ass by 3. Pretty sure she still does it for him. Ugh...
My BS was 5???
My BS was 5???
I've wiped my SD bum she's 5
I've wiped my SD bum she's 5 but agree she should learn to do it herself. I had actually done it during the morning sickness stages of my pregnancy that was fun...Not!
Hell, my SS15 can't even wipe
Hell, my SS15 can't even wipe his own ass!
I refuse to go anywhere near his laundry because of the clumpy skidmarks.
S12 probably wonders why his
S12 probably wonders why his underwear supply is running low... Any time they end up in the laundry (they have a separate laundry bin) with skidmarks that can come off in clumps, they go into the trash. Disgusting!!!
Hahaha! This was our youngest
Hahaha! This was our youngest S-kid. Was 7 y/o and DH is still wiping him or "daddy can you check me??"
We have the issue that no one
We have the issue that no one helps SD4 at home, so she just doesn't wipe her butt either at all. Just goes and pulls her pants up sitting with poop on her butt all day. So her underwear is always streaked. When she is here, she is suppose to tell us and attempt it herself first. But doesnt want to so she hides it. And tries to hide the dirty underwear. How did I get involved with being on the poop police force? "Oh SO, you daughter is in the bathroom...." I will take BS diaper duty any day.
At 6, she should be wiping
At 6, she should be wiping her own arse. As soon as my kids are potty trained, I start training them to wipe themselves. At 3-4, yes, they need help. Not only first grade, but I find it hard to believe a teacher was wiping her arse in kindergarten. Can you imagine a teacher having to wipe 20-30 kids arses a day? Because they don't. This child is extremely coddled and your DH probably just doesn't know better.
My SD is stb 4 and wipes her
My SD is stb 4 and wipes her own butt, we have wipes in the toilet for poops, occassionally her dad will ask her if she needs help but otherwise its her own thing.
I have never once wiped her backside and I certainly wouldnt start now. Personal hygiene is an important lesson, at bathtime shes the one washing herself (apart from her hair and back since she cant negotiate that yet, naturally)
If SD6 is whiny and lazy about it then tell her if she wants to be treated like a baby thats fine. You can start assisting on toilet visits, hand her the wipes and have her do it. Yes its time consuming but honestly, its better than her having crap stained underwear and stinking at school.