Hi my name is Frank and I dont know how to respond or deal with an issue regarding my step daughter and step grand daughter. It has caused for my new marriage of about five months with a woman I believe to be my soulmate to become in danger of seperation and possibly worse. my wife and I enjoyed a fun and close relationship for a short time before her grand daughter came to live with us. I am 55 and my wife is about the same age { but is much prettier and looks beautifully younger than me } and her bio grand daughter { 15 year old } came to live with us shortly after we were married. she had run away from the home of her bio father and stepmother for unknown reasons but I believe her relationship with her step mother may have had played a big part of it and possibly some physical punishment concerns after multiple periods of not coming home at night and or not being able to come and go as she pleases. unlike what her grand mother m{ my wife } allows as she gives her pretty much all the freedom she wants. In the beginning their were rules set in our home and they were loosely followed and eventually pretty much abandoned shortly after coming to live with us. My wife asked me when it started to become an issue with me and after seeing her under the influence of what appears to be marijuana and issues of getting detention at school regarding using her cell phone in class and also for cutting classes, to please not let her grand daughter come between us, and of course I agreed. Being an veteran of the the military of two tours of duty I have very good management skills on dealing with fresh and young men and women and can easily pick up on when someone is testing your limits and/or boundaries as this has been going on for sometime. The point where I am now with my step grand daughter is sadly completely out of control. She easily manipulates my wife and lies to her knowing and while Im standing right there that unless I want problems Im not going to say much, and this has gotten to the point where she smirks at me while hugging my wife in a false display of how sorry she is ..... shes actually taking trophies and voices that fact to me when her grand mother is not there. My wife works days during the week and I have yet been able to find suitable employment, only temp positions that require heavy labor labor and am in our apartment more so than not. At this point in time my step grand daughter has no relations with me whatsoever when my wife is not home my step grand daughter openly disrespects me viciously with put downs foul and disgusting passages and threats and has even went so far as to place signage of drug use props near her sleeping living area and telling my wife I planted it there to get her in trouble. we live on a tight limited income and get no help financially from either bio parent. Before being married I lived on a limited income also and qualified For a fed food voucher of about $200. a month that with the combined income of my wife and part time agency income we lived paycheck to paycheck and still managed to get the small things that were enjoyed such as movie rentals or going for drive or visiting friends or going out to dinner together on occasion. Food regularly that is bought for our house hold is missing and after a brief confrontation by her at which point she told me she can take what she wants out of the house when she wants cuase the food comes from the government learned why food bought that lasted us a month, why where running out in the middle of the month. personal possessions i have had in my shave come up missing. things like a folding buck knife I was given as a gift while serving in the armed forces more than 35 years ago, it wouldnt be a reason to leave my wife but what bothers me is my step grand daughter has asked me to barrow it many times and I always declined, in addition to bragging about stabbing a male friend of her mothers for not reporting to her as to where he and his mother are going. little things like drinking whatever is in a container in the fridge out of the container into her mouth or not picking up after herself or blaring her blue toothed enhanced device with completely foul and shameful lyric music she listens to slamming doors demanding attitude towards her grand mother and myself without a hint of respect....... and my wife just stands by and sweeps most of this under the rug. Last night an neighbor called very worried after learning her son who has never been like my step grand daughter or in any trouble with the law or at school, and feared for her sons safety as she put pressure on another neighbors child to tell where her son was and found out he was talked into going out to the river and get drunk on hard liquor. My wife punished her of course by making her stay home after finding out where she was at and seeing her under the influence, only because there was an an confrontation about going back out to where this was taking place.After many many attempts at trying to talk with my wife about this like right before I joined this site moments ago and was told not now we will talk about this later..... I feel I can no longer live like this and told my wife I was going to go and spend some time with my mother ..... who happened to suffer a stroke just last night and as I write this I am shaking and feel completely void and lost, I fell no validation from my wife and in anger and some hurt I believe she said something to me that caught me completely off guard..... she said she didnt care and that all I wanted to do was bail out on our marriage...... I believe in the good Lord in heaven and know why he sent his only son Jesus and pray often many times daily...... at this moment I am lost to the world and dont know what I can do but to temporarily leave this explosive situation. has anybody been thru something like this cause I sure could listen to some and use some solid sound advice....... my name is Frank