child support question
DH has an old court order that states how much he should be paying in child support. This order was filed way back probably 8 years ago when DH and BM were high conflict. They followed the order for maybe 1 year and then neither of them followed it for some reason. We live 8 hours away and SS12 comes to spend holidays and summers with us and if DH goes to his town, he asks BM to see SS and the answer is usually yes. There have been no huge conflicts between them for a few years now. They still don't co parent at all but get along fine.
MY question is he was court ordered to pay around 350 a month based on his income from 8 years ago. He has since went to school and has a career now and is making more than he was back then. He has since upped the child support voluntarily and has been paying BM 500 a month for over 2 years. She has started to become difficult again and threatening to bring him to court saying he should be paying more. DH started his own business last year and because of that his income dropped substantially for the past year. We are still doing ok because of my income. So if she does bring DH to court, his income taxes last year and this year would show his drop in income to prove that he should only be paying around 250 a month. The problem is he had a much higher income before he started his own business and he's worried BM will get him for back child support even though he has never missed a payment of 500 for the past 2 years and at least 450 the years prior to that.
I know anything above the court ordered child support is considered a gift and I did warn him but he felt that since he was making more, he should be paying BM more. Obviously BM is a money hungry and won't work with us. I know it's different laws depending on location, but if you have any insight to this, please let me know!
SO has recently talked with
SO has recently talked with his lawyer about this. Until she goes back to court (or you guys do) then the child support is still the original 350. Yes anything over doesn't count and is considered a gift but she can't come after you guys for the difference in what she COULD have gotten if she'd taken you to court.
That's how it is in our state at least.
I forgot to mention a problem
I forgot to mention a problem we do have...SS lived with us for 1 school year a couple years ago. BM said she couldn't handle him anymore and said for us to take him, then when she found out we actually disciplined him and had him follow certain household rules, she threw a fit and made us fly him back. During that 8 months that he lived with us, DH and BM had an agreement that he didn't have to pay the child support. She wrote us a letter confirming this, but I would have to search hard to find that letter. I know I should I made copies.
How would this affect the child support back payments if any?
No, Bm and Dh both opted out
No, Bm and Dh both opted out of the CS bureau. Could that help his cause?
It is extremely unlikely IMHO
It is extremely unlikely IMHO that a court would nail DH for back CS when he has more than complied with his CS order. I would say that he should pay no more than the CO stipulates and if BM wants to roll the dice and go for a CS review... so be it.
7X
The letter BM wrote during the 8mos he lived with you should cover DH for the CS for that period... maybe.
Time to cut BM back to the $350 and put the ball in her court. His past income is not relevant IMHO. Only his last years income will likely be considered for establishing a new CS amount if BM takes it to court.
Our last CS review we only were required to provide our last years tax returns and current pay stubs. The SPermIdiot was required to provide the same. It had been 9 years since the last CS modification so the DipShitIot got nailed for a ton more CS. Unlike your DH's current income the SpermIdiots had about tripled. My wife's was up about 10X and the combined bioparent income drove the SpermIdiot's CS obligation up by ~6X. After some whining and crying by the DipShitIot the CS was adjusted down to a level ~3X of what it had been prior to the 6X increase.
I think your DH will be fine.
Enjoy the BM's exploding head over all of this. }:)
Yes BM is becoming more
Yes BM is becoming more difficult. She has always been difficult but DH always seemed to think that if he threw more more money at her, his problem will go away. The extra money seemed to pacify her for a bit and then she comes back and wants more. If we go to court she is going to want more than the 500. She doesn't even know DH plans on paying the original 350 starting next month. She is going to flip out.
Also DH is one of those dads that would not ask for BM to pay child support if SS comes to live with us again. BM is on welfare and doesn't work so he says she has nothing to give him anyway.
To answer your question on the income drop, DH started a job and made a nice increase in salary but was then laid off due to a depressed oil and gas economy that has since not recovered. This was 2 years ago. He started his own business 1.5 years ago.
You nailed the issue with
You nailed the issue with this. "It's all a crap shoot when you go to court. There's the law and then there's what a judge will actually do."
The problem with Family Law is that ... there really is no law. At least there is very little legislated law. There is primarily case law that is based on the nearly infinite outcomes that an idiot in a black robe can pull out of their own ass.
Rarely do I find that what they pull out of their own ass is actually in the best interests of a child.
One of the eternal mantras of family law is "It is best that the child have a relationship with both of their parents." Bullshit! Not when one or both of those parents are useless wastes of skin POS morons incapable of making a good decision. No child should be forced to spend time with criminal, neglectful, abusive, or otherwise inept people even if those people are the kids BPs.
IMHO of course.
You know, $250 a month where
You know, $250 a month where I live would mean your DH makes a mere sum of less than $15,000 a year. Even with it being $350-$500 rather than the supposed 'new rate' you claim should be $250, it's all peanuts. You must be supplementing your household to a large extent.
If she's pounding her chest and squealing about going to court? Let her. The chips will fall where they fall. This is an able bodied man who is capable of working. She'll either get the $250, the $350 or the $500 (or more) and it will be legal and per the areas guidelines and laws.
The important lesson your Dh should be learning here is 1) people who have children are required to support them ( why doesn't BM work?) 2)people who make sideline agreements with their ex can and do live to regret it as it falls apart 3) there is a reason to go through the courts and keep all changes current and legal whether that be financial or living arrangements. Make the changes legal and unquestionable 4) don't make deals with the devil.
I know your country does things way different than US states do (and then each state does their own varying). My point in relying was to say don't let your DH make the same mistakes again. I know my typical advice is disengage from this kind of stuff and let the parents sort out without you, but in your case no. Make sure he makes no more agreements with BM outside the courts. She can not be trusted and whatever he innocently agrees to may or may not be legal and binding. Dh needs to make whatever happens documented and filed in court and if anything is later modified that too goes the court route. It's the only way your Dh can cover himself in the event BM up and wants more of this or that or drops off the kiddo again.
Last year on his tax return,
Last year on his tax return, he does show less than 15000 for his income from the business. It was the first year in business so it was expected with all the business start up expenses. And yes, my income is able to support the household. Just for clarification purposes, when DH got the court order, he was making around 27,000. His income went up but fluctuated between 30,000 and 90,000 (for 1 year). Most of that time it was around 50,000.
BM doesn't work because she likes to collect welfare. She likes her free money and a leach on society. She is able bodied as well.
I will relay this message to DH, thank you!