Irresponsible Little Brats
ARRGH!!! I just wanna scream. My SS's are sooooooo damn immature and irresponsible. They are 8 and 9. I don't know about you but when I was that age, I had a chore list a mile long. Theirs is simple. SS9 gets dishes, feeding the cats and clearing off the kitchen table. SS8 straightens up the living room, feeds the dog and cleans the bathroom. They are each responsible for their own room. Notice I said "straighten up"? Yea, no deep cleaning, I do that part. So for the last 3 days I have been down with bronchitis and walking pnamoanua (ya, I have no clue how to spell that) and my mother had to drive 3 hours away to watch the kids for me b/c MIL was too "busy" and she lives 20 min away. My mom likes a very clean house but she also knows that if you give theses boy's an inch, they will take a country. So she has no clue what they're chores are, just knows that they have some and tells them to get them done. So yesterday I finally start feeling better and my house looks good (thanks to my mom) and the dog hasn't been fed in 2 days. You can't leave his food out because the cats eat it then get sick.
This is just one of many things they know they are supposed to do but don't. SO when they got home and wanted a snack yesterday, I told them no. WHen tahy wanted supper, I told them "are you kidding, the dog did not eat for 2 days. You're not eating tonight." So this morning they want breakfast. I just look at them, sliently willing them to remember to feed the dog first. Instead they let him to use the doggie bathroom and of course he runs off. He'a s mini-pin and if you don't go out with him, taht is what he does. So as I write this, they are sitting on the couch, giving me dirty looks and plotting how to off me I am sure.
Oh wait, now they go outside to call for the dog so they can feed and and eat themselves. Hmmm.. lesson learned? Not with these 2. This is not the first time.
They don't brush their teeth or take a shower without being reminded EVERY night and sometimes I have caught them just running the water and wetting their hair or getting their toothbrush wet. Clean their rooms? Only when I go in there and put everything on their beds, I'm talking dressers drawers, everything in the closet, ect... Their chores? LOL that's funny. FOr 2 years now they have lived with us. They know better and they know what i expect. DH is gone alot for work and BB isn't allowed to see them at this point. (Court Order) SHe created these lazy, rude, demanding little sucubuses and I have to deal with the aftermath. I must have been a really naughty child to have this as my present and future.
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It sounds a little normal
Kids need to know that for every action there is a reaction-
for every wrong there is a consequences. Just my opinion but they are young and they need to learn and thank goodness you are there to teach them. The thing with the shower or the teeth- i remember doing that- it is a game to them to see what they can get away with.
Let them get a cavity that will surely change their mind-
I believe if you stay strong and consistant they will get the picture- not only that when they hit pre-teen they will take more time in getting ready- you just have to plant the seed and give it a kick every once in awhile-
I take parenting as a challenge- I like to come up with creative ways to "punish" them - gets to think. Like you did with the food-
my kids are 17 and 13 and they are forget once in awhile- but i have noticed lately i am not talking to them or reminding them so much-
for example i told my son and daughter both rooms and all laundry is to be done by noon ( the clothes they need to bring down and sort) if they do not have their clothes down by noon then i don't do them- well my son had to test that theory-
so he had to wait till i did everyone else's laundry and he did his own- he even got on the net to find out how to do laundry- but you know what he did not forget to bring them down again- and when used to put up a fuss about doing something not on their chore list I would wait until they wanted me to take them somewhere and I would be like "no" you don't do what is needed to help out then i don't have the time to take you. They learned that we are a family and we help each other out- now when i ask they just do it. Good luck stay strong and remember they are young and still learning!!!
LOL
I so understand. I call it "Creative Parenting". Thank you, you reminded me that keeping a sense of humor is important. I usually do giggle a little when I get that "look" when I ask them to do something.
IF IT WAS EASY, EVERYONE WOULD DO IT.
Make sure you get blessed.......
You just described both the step brat and my own daughter and they are 10.5 and 15!!! They are both at the stage that if you ask them to lift a finger to do anything they carry on as if you have asked them to donate their legs to research!! My method of correction in this area ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS results in them being taught a lesson and myself getting blessed in the process...
My 15 year old keeps her room clean because she knows "Mr. Hefty"..She knows that if she doesn't keep her room clean mom will clean it for her with the "mr hefty" method..Me and my trusty Mr. Hefty bag will go in and clean it up real good...LOL..Expensive items left out, for instance electonics ect, are not thrown out but they are confiscated and it takes a few weeks of "extra choires" such as cleaning up dog poop, washing and cleaning my car, taking out the garbage and various sundries of choirs that I hate to do to get them back..I get blessed and they learn a lesson..LOL..
The step brat still keeps her room like a wreck..So she is forever having to do extra choires to earn back her valuable things that she leaves out..Ummmm..Fine with me! LOL.. If she wants to continue to be a slob and leave valuable stuff out..Then she can continue to be the one to clean out the fridge and wipe it down, pick up dog "treats" in the back yard and do all the dusting..LOL...Just less that I have to do..
Leave dirty clothes laying out and on the floor?? Fine, they just earned the privledge of doing the laundry!! LOL..At 8 and 9 they are old enough to learn how to do laundry...
Don't wanna shower or brush their teeth..This is grounds for bathing the dog and brushing the dogs teeth (yes our dog has his own tooth brush and tooth paste). Neither of them particularly enjoy trying to bath a 75 pound basset hound and cleaning up the bath room after wards. He is really floppy and drooly so they really don't enjoy brushing his teeth.LOL..Our basset can get pretty stinkey and he shakes all over the bath room and the bath giver. This teaches them the importance of using soap and water to clean that which is smelly..LOL.. Further more, it blesses me because I don't have to do it.
Blow off feeding the dog?? Thats ground for them to clean the entire dog food area to include the dogs dishes and the dogs pens. And they also have to take the dog for his walk for an entire week to make amends to the dog for forgetting to feed him..
I am all for constructive disipline..But the trick is to make sure that the punishment involves something that blesses you in the process..
Think about it?? How enjoyable would it be for you to curl up on the couch with a nice cup of tea while the step kids cleaned out your fridge, bathed the dog, cleaned up the yard, reorganized your kitchen cupboards???
You will find yourself, secretly, hoping in your heart that they blow something off so you can give them a choir that you really don't want to do...LOL...Muhaaaaaa...
ROTFLMOA
Oh I have tears in my from laughing so hard. I wish those things would work for me. Problem is, they ENJOY bathing the dog (he's only 6 pounds and really sweet) and walking the dog just means extra playtime with their friends, the dog is an inside dog so no doggy pen, but the rest is very doable and you have also given me a few ideas as I look around my house with a gleam in eyes thinking of all the things I do on a daily basis that I could let them do instead. I just have ot learn not to be so particular in how I want things done since they are 8 & 9 and boy's to boot. HMMMM... oh ya, the joy, I mean peace, I can have. Thank you so much.
IF IT WAS EASY, EVERYONE WOULD DO IT.
Oh no no now...
Oh no no now... A big part of the blessing is that when they are done..It looks how it would look if YOU had done it yourself...After all, it's not blessing you if you have to go in and touch up an area that someone else did a half assed job on...Right? Oh no..that is NOT a blessing...LOL..
If they don't clean it to where it looks like you did..Then you go in the area with them and point out what they missed and need to do or redo..And if you have to go in their 10 times to point out things that they missed or didn't do so be it.. (Can you say..."you missed a spot? I knew that you could!! LOL)
That's part of the (torment) of the punishment and part of making sure it hits home and you are truly blessed! Not to mention it teaches them how to properly clean and organize..They need that as part of preparation for adult hood anyway!! What a wonderful mom you are to prepare them for adult life and correct them at the same time???!!!! (While you get your own personal blessing and enjoyment!)
There I go again
laughing so hard I might pee myself. You're right, I know you are, and I could find it very comical when they give me those "looks". Or I hear them mumbling under their breath. You know, I do feel a major blessing comming on!!!!
IF IT WAS EASY, EVERYONE WOULD DO IT.
Boys and bathing
My BS9... what can I say?! Sometimes I have to give him the "sniff check" when he's coming out of the bathroom because with him, you can never be sure!
Me: Honey, did you use soap?
BS9: No, but I let the shampoo bubbles run off my head and down my body.
Me: How can your hair be dry if you just washed it?
BS9: I blew it dry with the hairdryer.
Me: Then how come you still have dirt on your scalp?
BS9: Oh, I must have missed a spot.
Me: Did you brush your teeth?
BS9: Um, I think I did, but I don't remember.
Me: Do I need to smell your breath?
BS9: Oh, wait! No, I don't think I did. I'll go do it now.
Me: Did you wash your hands?
BS9: Yes, see? (Holds up palms for inspection.)j
Me: Yeah, Jake, but turn them over... they are black on the other side!
BS9: Hmmm. How did THAT happen?
What is it with boys and being dirty?! He asked me for a trial size thing of deoderant a few months ago and I asked him why he wanted it. He said so it would make him smell good enough that he wouldn't have to take a bath. I pity his future girlfriends!
~ Anne ~
We are the masters of our own fate; the architects of our own destiny.
Too Funny
I think my SS (10) is over that stage. Now he seen an ad on TV for I think it is called Axe. It is supposed to attract girls and now he smells overwhelmingly like that stuff. I can't breath around him LOL. He told me now he is Sexy....oh brother.... My SD is another whole story. Like your Skids she has to be told every step of the way what to do. Did you brush your teeth? Is that the same shirt you wore yesterday????? OMG did you change your socks. It is normal for that age.