it gets worse...
so my car issue turns out to be a blown head gasket :jawdrop:
my car is a 2002 but only has 61,000 miles on it!! over $1000 to fix. i am so livid. because:
A) we do not have the money EVER to fix this.
wont be able to pay for it until the 15th when we get paid again
C) will have to skip the mortgage in order to pay for it
D) i will be w/o a car until then
E) this means being stuck at hoem all wkend while SD is there too (i usually escape ALOT during visitation)
F) we cant afford ANYTHING thanks to DHs CS obligation
G) this was sooooooooooooo not what i needed after my other post today
why does it always have to be like this?? every time we get ahead, its two steps back. ALWAYS.
im gonna go crawl in a hole and hide now 
bella needs big big hugs today...
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no warranty???
Oh Bella, that sucks, can you charge the repair, to at least speed up the process?
I'm sorry girl, that sucks!
"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." Albert Einstein
nope no warranty
that expired years ago when i paid off my car. cant charge it either. have to wait until the 15th when we get paid again to get it fixed, so i will be w/o a car until then. i am so unhappy i cant even explain. this car was the last straw.
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin
you can't call your credit
you can't call your credit card company & ask to raise the limit by $1000 so you can charge it?
"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"
I know that feeling
The women where I worked for 6 years used to say they didn't want to stand too close to me at times, for fear my black/gray cloud would float over their head, even for a MINUTE.
Take a deep breath Bella. And don't EVER ask if it could get any worse. In my experience, God has an ironic sense of humor when you ask that one.
"Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra
They say misery loves company....
"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere
A few years ago, when I was working as an insurance agents secretary, the agent quit & moved on. I was out of a job. Living on unemployment, trying to find work in this small town.
So, a cold, freezing morning, there was an ad on for a dispatcher (something I had done previously). Everything was pure ice-the roads were really bad. I got in my old car-this was in like 2006, and my car was a 1992 Tempo-to back it out of the garage. The tires slipped on the ice, and I hit a fence post.
the repair was $2,000. Actually as much as the car was worth. But I couldn't afford a newer vehicle, and buying a car as old as that one was risky-at least, with mine, I knew it had been maintained, and still had under 90,000 miles on it. So I had no option but to fix it. And no money coming in-except, as I recall, about $800/mo unemployment. Which doesn't go far in the midwest in the winter with high heating bills.
So I've been where you are,bella, and it sucks. But I got it done, got another job, and eventually replaced the $2,000. So it worked out ok. Not great, but ok.
Hang in there girl. My mom's favorite expression is "Better days are ahead". (((hugs)))
Oh my turn too
2002 a few weeks before Christmas. About 200 bucks in my checking acct til payday. Someone breaks into my crappy little Ford Escort and steals the cd player I finally splurged on the summer before, after years with a poor reception radio/broken cassette player.
Had just made the call to insurance, but hadn't even filed that paper work, when....
A week or so later, I had the day off to attend BS (then 4) preschool Christmas program. Put coffee on, but waited to shower til getting back from dropping off BSs so BS 4 could catch his preschool bus and SM always drove other BS with her two kids to elementary school. I usually wouldn't leave the coffee pot on, but exs was only a few minutes away. Dropped the boys off, drove down to turn onto the main street which is five lanes. Looked and leaped out in time to realize the pickup pulling a trailer that was turning into the business next to the side street I was on, was concealing another car I couldn't see.
BAMMM!
If I hadn't seen him and stopped sooner, the guy would have been in my lap. The guy I hit APOLOGIZED for even being there because "I NEVER come this way." The guy who's trailer blocked me seeing him apologized because he was only turning there to turn around because he missed his turn the street before. I handed the cop my insurance card, and told him, "Sorry - it's not current. My new card just came and it's at home." He BELIEVED me when he could have pulled my license right then and there.
Totaled my car and the other guy's too. He called his wife and when she showed up, she hugged her H and glared at me with daggers for daring to possibly cause him harm. I was so upset, and the guy towing the trailer offered me his cell saying, "Do you have someone to call?" I wanted to cry. NO. Just mom or dad. No one to hug me and glare daggers at someone else on my behalf. So...I called sons' SM to make sure she didn't drive other BS past my totaled car. After she dropped the boys off, she called her dad she worked for to call off, came down and picked me up, brought me back to their house and poured me a fresh cup of coffee. Then she handed me the keys to their minivan they weren't using that day, until my rental came later in the afternoon. Oh- yeah. And she and my exH saved me a seat at the preschool Christmas program.
All I could say to myself to make myself feel better was...
It could have been worse. No one died today.
It's something I've said for the couple of fender benders I have had in my life.
But man oh man...had to start car shopping at Christmas. I hadn't had a car payment since the divorce and I couldn't imagine how I would be able to work one in.
My brother was in town and took me car shopping every day over the holidays. When I couldn't decide, the guy who had sold me all my cars when I was married, loaned me his beater car for TWO months for free, til I picked out a jeep to buy from him.
I think Bella...sometimes these crazy things happen and we feel like "why do I have such bad luck."
But... that accident brought about some of the kindest gestures I have ever experienced in my life. And those things help to restore our faith, especially that there are kind people in the world who truly care about us.
I know it's hard to realize it...but it's only money. It's only a car. You have DH and he loves you. You two will find a way to make it work.
"Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra
Well that story confirms
Well that story confirms that you aren't a crazy BM! Your sons SM is actually nice to you! You're lucky! My exH has yet to get into a relationship so I'm waiting for the day it happens & whether she's going to hate me for no apparent reason LOL Thats a very touching story though, it made me smile
"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"
Oh, Bella, I'm really sorry for you
All I can do is send those BIG (((((((HUGS)))))) your way and hope that things look better for you very soon.
I remember all too well those feelings of being "trapped" in a house when my POS '77 Ford Granada (we got it in 1992 for $200) was broken down more than it ran (Gee, I wonder why???) and I was stranded in my tiny hovel of a house with a toddler and $3 to my name.
And curiously, those days were always the days when my ex always had to "work late" and had the good car. (Yeah, right- so why do your clothes smell like beer & smoke?)
Those days absolutely sucked. So I feel your pain.
"If you have never been hated by a child, you have never been a parent."
-Bette Davis
Hey
Keep in mind if you really need to get out this weekend, I could pick you up and we could go out to lunch or something. It's gonna be really cold this weekend though.
Dawn
aw dawn ur so sweet
id love to meet u for luch or coffee one day but i absolutely could never ask u to come pick me up. thanks so much for the lovely offer though. when i get my car back, i promise we will get together.
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin
bella...
ok, but just know that if you absolutely have to get out of the house, let me know. I'm not that far away.
Dawn
thanks dawn
at this point, DH has agreed to let me use his car so i can have some "me" time. but i will let u know!
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin
sending hugs your way
I know how you feel, are you bruised from banging your head against the wall yet???"~waiting on the world to change~"
if i were in your spot
I know i would have to get away over the weekend..I would all of a sudden take up out door exercise. Id bundle up and head out doors.......walk walk walk......maybe stop have a bit to eat (and a sip to drink) and walk back home....I'd figure i would use up at least 6-8 hours on that one...and then repeat the process next day. IN my world if i need to get away i will!! car or no car. My car broke down last year. 2004 jetta 55,000 the clutch went. go figure...$1000.00. swell and i just got done paying it off. Took me a while to come up with the bucks . I was without my car for 3 weeks! It was hell!!! Hang in there HUGS!!!!
walking WOULD work except
not 30 mins after i first posted, i left work and on my way out where DH was waiting to drive us home, i slipped, fell and twisted my ankle. rite in the reception area of our HUGE company. i was so embarassed, some guy asked if i was okay and said i shud get checked out. i just said no im fine thanks and hurried out. got into the car and lost it. cried the whole way home. DH didnt know what to do bc he couldnt console me. my ankle hurt so bad i had to call off work today BECAUSE my internet has not been working here at home since sat and i had an appt today at 3 to get it fixed. (its 530 and they just left--didnt get here til 515 naturally) well, i wouldve had to leave work early, drive home, wait for them and then drive back to get DH and w my now sprained ankle, i couldnt drive
so i was stuck home all day and couldnt even get online w y'all.
i told DH i NEED the car this wkend. the thing is, i especially hate being here when SD first comes over. its like the very loud breaking of the silence that is my otherwise happy life. and this wkend will be especially bad bc we havent had SD in a month and its been bliss not having to deal w or worry about anything. i know its awful, but honestly, the less i am around when shes here, the better off EVERYONE is. i just need the escape.
DH and i have been fighting so much the past few days...the car was the last straw, well actually, i guess the ankle was. i cried my eyes out bc its just like why me, why now?? to make matters worse, yest when the proverbial shit hit the fan i was ovulating and we've started trying to conceive. so needless to say there wont be 2 pink lines this month. which is fine, bc rite now i feel so hopeless im not even sure i want a baby. i really do but i dont see how we can afford it. everytime we get ahead something like this happens...it just seems we wont ever get what we want. even DH said so. im been so moody and miserable bc of everything that im ruining the one good thing in my life--DH. so that has got to stop. time to end the pity party and get back to being myself.
so............. *sigh* hopefully better days ARE ahead.
oh and doglover, my car is an '02 VW GTI and DAMN arent v'dubs expensive??? great little cars but man!
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin
oh bella
HUGS HUGS HUGS!!!! Call SW she always cheers me up!
thanks for those hugs everyone!
ive been checking the site from my phone due to lack of internet but coudlnt log in to post and tell y'all thank u and let u know how much ur kind words mean. like i said, i do have alot to be thankful for, just had a rough couple days, and its time to pull it together!
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin