So early last night EB ( evil bitch ) calls..i tell bf..go ahead answer it- i shouldnt have told him what to do, i sometimes do before i think.. but im thinking crap man.. if he doesnt answer itll be another voicemail ill wanna know and im sick if this game already.. JUST ANSWER IT..
Bi polar is what she acts like.. one minute shes a raging LYING bitch then out of the blue shes all considerate? She says she thought she would call to see if he wanted to discuss anything about school if he had any questions because she just found yet another new house to move into, meaning new schools for all.. its like a yearly ritual with her since her new found money came into play.. he says yeah.. like whats the name of the schools.. im so rolling my eyes ..yeah im rolling my eyes.. im sure we have all done it. its just coming so much more naturally anymore its SICKENING to me. ok so he is getting the names of the schools and all that crap and earlier this week she THOUGHT she was going to take the kids from us wednesday because one boy has meet the teacher night and the other one has to go see his own councelor in his new highschool but i told bf..the hell she is .she can pick them up for the appt time and bring them back .. she isnt interrupting the WEEK we have them ..and yeah why cant you take them ( he mentioned and i agreed ) i vented on that here earler.. but anyway.. it just worked out matter of factly ..strange too smoothly aka WHATS UP?
He is taking the youngest.. but yet there was no appt like she claimed for the other ( lying bitch) which meant she thought she was going to take them from us on wednesday for what reason?? her convenience and her acting like the queen is why. the youngst ones appt isnt until thurs nite for like 5 min.. and who knows on the the other one.. such bullshit ..dont get me wrong its not a huge blown out big deal about the kids needing to go meet the new school deal its important , its just how shit is handled.. and the control shit and her rightousness crap and the whole shit deal. i hate what she represents... one of many!

I find myself getting numb anymore.. i cant fight anymore with bf over this shit because i swear to gods.. we dont argue about anything at all but this shit.. i laugh inside my head like im insane becasue I AM. i stare sometimes and dont say anything because i cant.. i dont know what im saying anymore ..i know this could be soo simple.. but its not..

later on the oldest one says .. ~ the other night me and mom and brother and grandma went out to eat at Red Robin and omg the check was 100 dollars..~

its hard.. you love your guy you love the kids but you just dont want the rest of it that comes with it.. and thats the plain truth. im not sure i can go on like this because it starts to seep into my ENTIRE being..i dont WANT to walk away but im dying as a person. even if i didnt get upset i still know in the back if my mind that she knows that she is in control and i hate it and i hate always feeling like poo anymore.. and then on top of that i feel guilt for not being super woman and making life soo dreamy for everyone! no matter how you slice it its like living with another woman. that never ending bond of BS and i freeking HATE it. i cant even relax when we are on our time when we dont have the kids because when the kids call.. things are talked about thats going on over there.its like im watching the continue of thier world. and its always something and then im already geared up for the next time they are with us . eeek already! i must sound like im nuts!