No it does not specify the birthday's for BM/BF in my DH's divorce papers. Only the children's birthday every other year. But through lot's of research I have seen what your talking about in other peoples cases. If the papers are specified that the your skids are to be with DH on his birthday at a specific time then she has to let them go. You would be able to get her on contempt of court for refusing visitation. What is her reason for only allowing 2 hours? are they going to the doctor or dentist that day? Is it during the weekend or during the schoolweek? Make sure you are keeping a paper trail of all the days he gives up for her and ever day of visitation that she refuses, even if it's just less time during that day. You will need the paper trail for any future court dates. I have been with my husband for 3 years and we have been to court with his EX about 6 times. She has to follow the papers unless him and her can work out a better situation, but obviously he doesn't agree to only 2 of his hours for his birthday. Giving her a week advance notice was completly fair and she shouldn't refuse him. Did DH remind her that she had them for her birthday during the summer?

No, we don't have it. Is there a reason for the 2 hour time limit? Is it a school night or whats the deal?

According to the order, they are supposed to spend mother's birthday with mother and father's birthday with father. Same with Mother's Day and Father's Day. Has she ever let him have the kids on his birthday, Father's Day or ever other holiday and every other weekend per that order? No, she hasn't.

~ Anne ~

"Adjust on the fly, or you're going to cry."
Steve Doocy, The Mr. and Mrs. Happy Handbook

yes , we have them designated
"We don't understand life anymore at 40 then at 20, but we know it and admit it" Jules Renard

the MTA was ammended in mediation to allow birthday visitation for my dh and his ex. My dh has taken them for a few hours on his bday consistely over the last few years if the day falls on time when they don't have them. Hasn't been a huge problem overall.

we have it designated. If it states the "day", that does not constitute 2 hours. Not that it matters to BMs, but I mean really - look the word up in the dictionary, not that hard to decipher.

But if she's a real stink about it, I would take those couple hours and got to dinner. Then if you need to celebrate more than dinner, do it on your regular visit. Then make sure DH asks her if this is the new rule, becuase you would assume then that she will only be allowed 2 hours as well when her birthday rolls around.

BM did this to DH for Thanksgiving. She only let him take the girls for four hours, they argued and argued and argued. As soon as he stopped arguing about it, she got her way and the following Thanksgiving DH let her keep them through the weekend (his time with them). So when his turn came the next year and he reminded her of his generosity, she didn't argue.

I think your BM is just wanting the drama. Your decision on the pursuit of this possible huge blowout should be based on how important it is to your husband spending his ACTUAL birthday with the kids. For me, it wouldn't be worth it.

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...It's about learning to dance in the rain."

There is vague wording in DH' court order that states child is with father on his birthday, mother on her birthday and child with parent on every other birthday. First of there are no exact times thus either parent could be a pill and stipulate when the other parent can have SD. If we have SD, DH lets BM have her from 8AM to 8PM. On the other hand BM tries to stop DH from visiting SD---sometimes not at all, to sometimes a couple of hours, etc. BM even suggest on SD birthday in 2007 for BM, DH and SD to go out together for a birthday celebration---BM didn't include me or my son. Of course DH refused and said he was picking SD up from school and BM could pick SD up at 8PM.

Just during Winter Vacation BM refused for DH to pick SD up on the date & time that was supposed to be the halfway mark of the vacation. Instead BM let DH pick SD up a day later. BM said that she was going to pick up SD the day before SD goes back to school because (now get this) the court order states that holidays end at 5PM the last day of the holiday. The court order doesn't state that----BM has pointed that out before to DH when DH requested SD was supposed to visit with him longer. BM tries to manipulate the court order in a way that only benefits her.

I suggest you send a detailed calendar (preferrably a full year's worth) to BM. This calendar should be detail dates and times for the father to have the child(ren). When you send it make sure to include a short letter stating the calendar is in accordance with the court order, that DH will be abiding by this calendar and if BM has an issue with it then she has 30 days to give you a written response including but not limited to dates in review, why BM feels the dates/times are wrong and BM's solution. I would also write that if BM does not respond in 30 days then she is in acceptance of the times and dates shown.

If BM waits til a week before you can request an emergency hearing thru the courts to let a judge decide. However I am not sure how much this costs, what it entails, etc.

Good Luck!