Crazy ex in laws and crossing boundaries
I dont know how to go about not going ballistic... long story short... ex and his whole immediate family just dont care about rules and boundaries. Showing up as they please on my wife's week expecting to walk in without knocking or permission... they have never not once been invited in... to take off with the kids out of town. If she doesnt answer before getting the first message, the ex or clan will blow our phones up. Like back to back calls and messages from multiple people all at once. It's been intensifying as trial is approaching. A trial they are started and told they would lose.. false allegations of abuse... dismissed... GAL sees no reason to change things... my wife is LE... they will wait until shes working in unit before trying to get me to do what they want me to. It's never worked, but for some reason they are all doing this a lot more. They are acting entitled to waltz into our home as they wish... hell... my wife was feeding our baby twice and ex followed her son in from playing with his friends and he stood in our door not saying anything and just staring at her and me like "what?". Hes never lived here nor been welcome. There is so much more that's happened... I was around for 2 yrs before they knew and soon as the knew the abuse claims started while police ignored the kids pleading that it was their father and grandmother hurting them. If we had the means we would be moving out of state far away from here
Are you guys lawyered up?
Are you guys lawyered up? Boundaries dude. If they're harassing you get a restraining order and blow it up when they violate. Be reasonable and allow reasonable contact, but not one shred more. But bad behaviour needs to be stopped.
Why aren't the police being
Why aren't the police being called? If your wife is in law enforcement, won't they rally behind her? Why in the world would you guys allow these people to waltz into your home without invitation repeatedly?
Do you not ever lock your
Do you not ever lock your doors? Mine are 100% always locked unless a known person is walking in (using a key I issued) or if someone has unlocked the door to open it for them. I do not live in an unsafe neighborhood...I just think it is "best practice".
Police here will tell you it
Police here will tell you it's a "civil matter". They dont want to deal with it no matter who it is. These people have been tight will many of the deputies for years. The reason the doors weren't locked is because the kids were outside playing with their friends in the front yard and he would follow them in. Cops were called. Nothing done. They acted like it wasnt a big deal at all. A few times the door was locked and they tried it then left. It's even been on video from the doorbell. Nothing. Basically unless we are physically attacked in our own home, the sheriff won't act. We are awaiting trial now. The GAL is soft on them for some reason. I dont get it. Small town politics? I dont know
It's a civil matter if
It's a civil matter if someone walks into your house without permission?
Well, this sucks for you, your wife has the male equivalent of the crazy BM. These people are fantastic at convincing everyone that they are the victims in every situation.
Document, lock your doors, kids now play in the backyard and get it fenced and lock the gate. Move to a community with a different police agency? All expensive and hard things to do, but may be worth it if losing in court doesn't calm the situation.
If they take the kids during your wife's week, that might be good for you, as that's clear custodial interference. But of course, not if they flee with them.
So who is helping Bio Dad with all of this harassment and conflict? His parents?
We are looking at buying a
We are looking at buying a house elsewhere, but the county doesnt want to allow us to move without reducing custody for her despite all of this. Our backyard is too close to a road where truckers speed through so the neighborhood kids stay out front.
It's the parents and his sisters. They told her several times before that they want her out of their lives and tried to make her pay child support even though he makes almost 100k/yr and she only makes like 30k fulltime. They want total control which partly led to her leaving ye ar s ago. They also believe that he shouldn't have to pay the meager cs he does because they believe we make more combined than he does. No way. My income shouldn't even come into account with it. My wife was blamed for his dating woes right before they found out we were getting married and after that it was game on for them. It's all recorded and documented. The truth is he spends all his time on dating sites for both seeking men and women and is an ugly sex addict with problems with maturity. They kept telling people in the community that she was a drug addicted whore and accused her of abusing her sons... My wife was really young and alone back then and they definitely took advantage of that. She was never like that. It was to hide the truth.. like... who would believe her if the whole clan was saying this stuff... they had her stalked and harassed her a lot... at one time had a TPO, yet judge allowed him to have shared parenting. Her dad passed away young and shes not close with other family. Now shes a stronger person and stands her ground
She just got a message stating that because she didnt answer them while at work and give in to their demand to take the kids early on her day, that shes obviously too busy to have her own kids. The grandparents showed up without consent right after she got home intending to take them because they wanted to. Swear... cant make this stuff up... they have no legal rights to the kids. She told them to beat it. I feel bad for my skids... their mom tries so hard to protect them from the mess but the grandparents and dad keep telling them that shes mean and worthless and trying to force them to say they want to only live with the bio dad, who isn't even really there... we are praying that the childrens therapist will be able to help them and help us get them away from that as much as possible..