Ever wonder what BM is like as a step parent?
My BM has a boyfriend with three kids from 2 different moms. I have met them & they seem like good kids, my step sons like them as well. Good thing as they spend eow with them. From the little I have seen both her & her BF are very hands off with each others kids.
SS7 was telling me about their weekend apparently they went up to BM's parents for the weekend & they went ice fishing. ( BM had mentioned this on Mon at the event we all went to, lucky me, and had said it was a 6 person ice house) I asked if " Bobby & Suzie" had fun & he said that only he & his brother went, the other two sat back at the house. I asked if they had not wanted to go too, & they had but there was not enough room so only he & his brother went. He said that " Bobby" had really wanted to go.
How crappy is that? I asked what they did while he & his brother were off having fun & he said I don't know. I am betting not much. I find it disturbing that one of the grown ups who can go anytime wouldn't let a little kid go in his place & that BM didn't seem to care as long as her two angels were having fun. The little boy is 6 years old.
I'm waiting
I'm waiting for the day that Bm becomes a stepmom. I know her current boyfriend has a teenager. I hope she does become a stepparent. Of course I don't know if her boyfriend's ex would be as bad as she was/is. Plus this kid is already a teenager so it just won't be the same. However, the way things usually go with her, she will have a new boyfriend in a few months anyway.
Dawn
One thing I find interesting
is that she has never met the mother of his youngest child.The boy is 2 years old & his birth kind of coinsides with when we think BM & BF started dating. This poor kid lives here in our town almost 1/1/2 hours away from the BF & the 1/2 siblings. According to step sons they all wait in the car when BF drops off or picks up. I get the feeling this was not a very happy break up. Also the step sons have only met the other kids mom once, and they told me she wasn't very nice. I wonder why???? BF worked with BM before she & DH were married & was in love her.
The BB in my life was a step
The BB in my life was a step mom for about 5 months before she threw her dh AND HIS KID out. She told me how horrible the BM in her situation was and I was thinking, hello - u are describing you to a T and then some! My SD said her mom was mean to her step sister, she is very jealous of my daughter and was of her step daughter too. (our daughters are two weeks apart) She gets mad at my DH because he is here for my daughter on bdays and everyday and she loves him and calls him dad (she calls her dad dad too and her stepmom momma ___) I have no prob with this. THe thing is she teaches my Sd to be jealous. We can't help that she up and moved 7 hours away. How do you expect us to be there on a bday in the middle of a work week? We can only get the kids when school is out and she needs childcare as my teenage daughter babysits.
So- with all that said, I want to add that when my stepson (not her son) lived with her she was horrible to him and he got treated differently than his sisters. She thinks he should still love her and cant understand why he doesn't
All in all - when she is on her meds she an ok person but when she is cylcing she is a horrible mother, step mother, and person altogether.
It sucks we cant see the kids EOW but then again I couldn't deal with her 24-7 if she did live here. She would call or comeby everyday I am sure!
I wish......
We have told BM that we wished her current husband had been a parent before they met, then she might get a clue that being a step parent is hard enough without the BM being a B***** about EVERYTHING!!!!!
"I prefer my life STRESS FREE...When you're STRESSIN'...You're STRESSIN' me"
interesting question
The main thing about BM is she feels the way to raise kids is to be their friend, not their parent. Being she also has selfish tendencys, it will be interesting to see how that works out with her daughter in the long run.
so far, since sd graduated and living at home, basically doing nothing, the fighting has increased between them.
After all if BM wants to be her daughters ( she is almost 20 ) friend, she isn't going to make her actually do anything unpleasant like chores or be responsible, like work full time or go to school and get an education.
lol as all that is work ! and friends don't make friends work !
lol
so, it will be interesting to see how it works out for them. Lucky for any kids her new BF doesn't have any kids. They would not like her. She is into bribery not parenting and has no moral compass at all. Her kids will end up hating her as would any step kids she may have one day.
BM is a jelous, immature person and jelous, immature people don't make good friends. She sucks as a parent, so there is not much to work with.
BM as a Stepmom
She's awful. She has one SD, who is almost 18. She used to come around in the beginning EOW, but now (because of BM) she RARELY sees her dad anymore and hasn't for some time now.
From what my SDs told me and my DH, BM and her SD have gotten into many ugly verbal arguements and it had even gotten physical at some points- this leading SD to not want to come around at all.
Why am I not surprised? If it was bad enough for BMs OWN
DAUGHTER to want to leave and live with us full-time for over 18 months before she went away to college, why would anyone who was NOT RELATED to BM want to live with her???
"Of course things worked out nicely for Carol Brady...she had a live-in maid and Mike's first wife was DEAD!"
I Have Often Wondered This
BM's boyfriend has two children of his own but you never see them around. She is constantly having the boyfriend tend to her kids but his are often sitting in the background, unheard from. Strange how easy they think it is for us to put up with their BS but they act as if they dont have to be held to the same standards when it comes to their STEP children.
Yes I have wondered this.
BM just recently got herself ANOTHER boyfirend and he has 2 sons from a previous relationship. Apparently SS7 told me they ALL slept over at BMs house during the holidays and BM gave her boyfirends youngest son SS7 bed and SS7 had to sleep on the floor, WTF! BF and I weren't happy when we heard this.
BF and I think that her boyfriends children will become more of a piority then BM children and if that does happen I worry that BF will want to go for full custody of all 3 boys, *sigh*, oh God help me.
I wonder this
I wonder this too...apparently according to BM she is a wonderful "mother" to her SDs (she claims to be their mother...she also says her best friend that is 11 years younger than her is her daughter as well, and hat girls 2 kids are her grandchildren...she's crazy), SS says SDs like his mom better than their own mother (who doesn't have custody and has a convicted child molester for a BF living with her) but according to my MIL she is mean to her SDs...so who knows!
"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy"