How to deal with this????
Hi everyone. I've been a member for a while now and have generally found the answers I've needed from other peoples posts so have never really posted myself.
A little background. Me and DH have been married 4 years. We have 2 DS and SS7 from his
Previous relationship. We live in the UK so SS7 lives primarily with BM but we have visitation EOWE and 2 nights a week. BM is the main cause of any problems we have with SS7, she trys
To PAS him at any given opportunity. There is various other stunts she has pulled but I gave up
Trying to understand her a long time ago. Crazy people don't know they are crazy, to them it's the other people that have the problem, that describes BM To a tee.
So to the problem. For the past 2 weekends we have had SS7 he has got himself that worked up after the court ordered phone call he has with his mum that he has made himself physically sick. We don't know what is being said during the phone call as we try not to interfere. Saturday was the worst because as soon as he hung up the phone he started with 'my throat hurts' then while eating dinner it was 'I feel sick'. Whilst DH put him to bed he was sick twice. He then asked to go home and normally DH would have called BM to collect him but me and DH have discussed this and after reading many posts on here we had decided that it was better for DH not to involve BM at all and just keep telling SS that he was fine and we would look after him.
Now SS has no medical problems but BM started to look like she was fabricating illness (munchausen to my American friends) to get DH to speak to her as this is the only time he will interact with BM. After BM tried to
Convince various medical professionals that SS had severe constipation and was constantly ill after eating certain foods (not true) and giving SS laxatives that hadn't been prescribed, SS was foun to be perfectly healthy and DH warned her that if she was to carry on then he would contact social services and be going for full custody.
So what's happening during these phone calls? Is it her attempt agian to get DH attention? Or is it PAS again? What's the best way we can deal with this?
Thanks ladies. Any other info you need just ask.
Put a recorder on your phone
Put a recorder on your phone and record the conversations between SS and BM. If only to understand what toxic toothless moron crap she is polluting him with.
We recorded every call from SpermLan for many years early in our marriage. In our state (Texas) is was legal to record any conversation that you are personally a party to without having to notify any other party. This was great fodder for baring the idiot oppositions asses in court when we had to.
Anyway, to understand what is going on with your SS you have to have information. So get the information.
IMHO of course.
DH has tried talking to him.
DH has tried talking to him. He has asked him what has upset him and why he feels like he does but he just scratches his chin(DH says he does this when he's trying to think of something to say). We don't want to push him to say anything or feel under pressure. We know BM has said some horrible things to SS regarding us in the past 'your dad doesn't love you', 'topmuffin stole daddy from you', 'daddy and topmuffin can't look after you etc etc.