How do you ignore BM speaking to your DH like s**t?
The title says it all really. I cannot stand it when I hear on the phone or via text BM being unbelievably rude or bitchy to my DH. I am a very very territorial and loyal person to my family members and it hurts me that someone like her thinks she can talk to MY DH, (they were barely in a relationship when kids were conceived, drunken stupid accidents TBH). See if anyone is rude to him i will stand up for him, and he does the same to me. I'm not talking about guns blazing reactions just 'that was uncalled for and unjustified, don't speak to DH like that, EVER'. Thats what you do.
However its got to the point where she will text him a be an absolute BM bitch, you know how they are and its like WTH is your problem. Don't contact him just to haev a go about stupidness and the next day ask him for a help coz your kids dont behanve on your watch...idiot. I get so angry about all of her un neccessary drama whilst DH does the man thing of ignoring her and then is a bit moody for a while. Why should i have to deal with a moody DH coz of some other cow.
How do you guys just switch off from it all, I cannot help get defensive over what he has to deal with because of her and it hurts me.DH is no angel, but he will ignore, ignore, ignore and then boom give it back, to which she then goes and cries to her 6yr old kid 'your daddy is being meany to me' WTF?!
Note, she has never been rude to him in front of me, because she knows what will happen to her. She is rude to him face to face, even in front of the kids which is disgusting and over the phone. I gave her the shock of her life a while ago when she said something about me, I called her and blasted her ass about her disgusting attitude and never to speak rude about me or any of my family, no cussing or threats, i'm not that stupid but she had a new one ripped! lol
I can't control how the BM
I can't control how the BM behaves.
But if my DH gets moody to me after she tears him a new one, I quickly point out to him that his moodiness is misdirected.
He typically doesn't let the stuff bother him (at least on the surface) -- which would always make me mad because something in me NEEDED to see him pissed at her antics. It got to the point his lack of response ate me up inside. I took a step back and disengaged from the whole thing. Until it affects me financially or emotionally (meaning, he gets shitty with me because he's frustrated at her) I don't really care WHAT she says. He's a big boy, he can take care of himself.
I seem to have the same
I seem to have the same problem. DH and I actually talked about this a few days ago after BM sent a stupid nasty text. DH lets it roll off him, but it makes me livid. Who the hell is she to talk to my husband like that. I would NEVER allow anyone I know to disrespect my husband like that, yet this bitch does. DH said it just does not bother him because she is not a concern of his that is why he never says anything to her about it.
I then asked him if he would be ok if my EX talked to me like she talks to him. He thought for a moment and said that he would hate it and it would make him mad. He will still probably never stand up for himself though because it would upset his 19 year old baby. YUK.
I really agree with what
I really agree with what B22S22 said, I can't control how the BM acts so I shouldn't be affected. At the same time though, when I read a bitchy text from her to him I *really* have to fight the urge not to text her back with something equally horrendous because she always has to include something nasty about me too. I just have to remember that even though she is yapping away, all she really wants is attention, especially from him (even though it's negative) because she isn't happy with her own life. Normally, all I have to think about is her messed up face (from years of meth abuse), her massive "front butt" and her overly dyed fake blond hair (all straw like and scraggly) and then it's easy to laugh her off! It sounds really petty, but thats the quickest way I get over it. Just keep in mind that she is a very sad woman who is desperately trying to hang on to something that doesn't exist and turn on some really loud music to wash it all away.
This is pretty exactly what I
This is pretty exactly what I was going to say but ever dreaming took the words right out of my...er keyboard?? lol. She just wants attention and this is her way of getting. Bm is always nasty with fdh and I would LOVE to tell her how horrible she is and how much her life sucks and that's why she's a b!tch BUT that's what she wants. We choose to ignore. I cannot remember who but someone here said that the best way to get back at bm is simply to ignore her. Respond to what you have to. Nothing bites a bm's bottom more than to simply be ignored. I know our bm wants fdh back and is angry that according to her I'm trying to take her place... but sorry, you should have realized that before you started cheating on fdh and then this wouldnt' be going on. Ignore that psycho, if you fight back she knows she's getting a rise out of you and her sick twisted mind she's won. Don't worry... that beast will get hers eventually...
Since your husband seems to
Since your husband seems to be able to take this and still deal with her why don't you tell him you don't want to hear about how she's acting or what she's saying other than generic? I.e. she'll be late bla bla bla instead of she said I'm an AH.
i know exactly what you're
i know exactly what you're saying. i wouldn't let anyone else speak to him like that, why does she get away with it? things have gotten ALOT better when he hangs up on her when she starts screaming. and he ignores her texts. but i wanna text back soooo bad!