I Hate My Boyfriends Son - Venting.

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I am a 22y/o Paramedic. My boyfriend is a 28 divorced firefighter, he has a 3yo terror.
Here's some background.
I've only been in two serious relationships, this being my second. My boyfriend is such a great person and I love him very much, we are in the same line of work, so we have lots in common.
I have two younger siblings 9 and 6 ( my parents are still together) I went through the parent stage as a teenager, I took care of my little brother and sister while my parents were at work, I quit sports to free my time up to help my parents out, I know how to raise a child, both of my younger siblings are smart and extremely well manored. There is no "Counting to 3" for them to do what they are told. They are dream kids.

My boyfriend divorced his wife after he found her cheating, his son was only a year old.
So now they split custody 50/50, when my boyfriend is at work ( firefighters work 24 hr shift every third day. 24hr on, 48 hr off) and it is his turn to have his son, the child spends the day with his super loving grandma.
So it's pretty apparent that the child bounces around from three different homes, BM and grandma do not discipline the kid whatsoever. When the child is at our house, he is a terror-always.

My boyfriend and I dated for 6 months before we moved in together. Everything was great until His child was more involved with my life. I hate coming home from a 24 hr shift to my house a mess and a 3yo brat torturing my cat. He cries when he doesn't get his way. Then just cries for no F*ing reason. I can't go out and do what a normal 22yo does because my boyfriend wants to bring his son, or doesn't want me to go if he can't go. I feel as if my life revolves around his child, and I'm just not okay with that. There is more and more resentment building because I PAY FOR EVERYTHING. I make twice as much money as my boyfriend. I pay all the bills. My boyfriend blows his paycheck on his kid, buys things we don't need.
Then asks me to buy crap for his child. It's so frustrating. We don't enjoy being around each other when his child is around. we are on our way to SeaWorld at the moment and all I can think about is pulling his car over and spanking his kid, because he F*ing needs it. Infact, everytime I'm around his kid I just picture myself beating him. I know that's unhealthy. I'm a nice clear headed person, but the second this kid enters my life I start loosing my mind.

Everything has been weighing down on me for the past month, I don't even want to have sex with my BF anymore. Part of me wants to leave him, I only have one life, I don't want to be miserable for the rest of it.
But if I leave, who's going to pay the bills? Because my BF surely can't do it w/o me.

I'm yonge and frustrated. Someone shed some light on this, because it sucks.

I can't go out and do what a

I can't go out and do what a normal 22yo does because my boyfriend wants to bring his son, or doesn't want me to go if he can't go. I feel as if my life revolves around his child, and I'm just not okay with that.
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^^^^^There's your answer, sweets. You're 22!! SO young! Why saddle yourself with a man who has these issues? There's a ton of other single young men that you would have tons in common with that haven't had a child. Please go and live your life and find one!

I honestly don't see anything positive from your relationship here...

And you say "who will pay the bills when you leave?" Guess what? Your BF is a grown man. HE will figure it out. Just like YOU have to take care of yourself, he will do the same. It's NOT your problem what happens to him after you're gone, so don't stay out of guilt.

I wish you the best of luck.

He's a user. Dump him.

I will keep it short and

I will keep it short and sweet for ya...You WILL regret it if you DON'T end this! YOLO

"But if I leave, who's going

"But if I leave, who's going to pay the bills? Because my BF surely can't do it w/o me."

That's not your problem. What did he do before he met you? What would he do if you were in an accident and unable to work? You can't let this self-imposed guilt talk you into staying if you're this unhappy.

If the kid is only 3 .. you still have a minimum of 15 years to deal with him. Is that how you envision the rest of your 20s and most of your 30s?

Thank you for your advise, I

Thank you for your advise, I know your tellin me things I already know.
Breaking up is hard, it would also mean moving back in with my parents, who don't have room for me.
Or moving in with a house full of Firefighters, both options suck.

i'm sure you could find a

i'm sure you could find a nice room to rent or a studio somewhere. It would be a start and something tells me it would cost a whole lot less than paying all of the shared bills for you and your Bf AND his kid.

Could not have agreed with

Could not have agreed with you any more!

He wants a new mommy for his

He wants a new mommy for his kid. At 22, that's a job you don't need!

I agree with others. You're

I agree with others. You're 22. When I was 22 there was NO WAY I could have spent my time with a three year old that much. Grant it, now I'm almost 26 and I'm finding myself involved with a man who has a 10 year old but I've changed a lot as a person and got a lot of partying/socializing out of my way in the past few years.
As tough as it may sound, this relationship may not be right for you. You've got some growing up (not in a bad way) to do and you'll find yourself resenting your boyfriend inevitably if you continue to do things his way and revolve your life around the kid.

Really, if your not there he

Really, if your not there he will find a way to pay the bills without you (and if he doesn't, its not your problem). Maybe his kid will just have to go without all these things. You sound like you are a really good person, and i totally know how you feel about being miserable as soon as SS comes round! I think you need to get out and live your life. You can do better