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I'm being gaslit by an 11yr old SD and Im losing my mind.

Breathing through it's picture

Submitted by Breathing through it on Fri, 05/19/2023 - 4:47am

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I'm being gaslit by an 11yr old SD and Im losing my mind.

She takes my stuff and moves it it disappears and reappears and then very convincingly to her father says it wasn't her. 

He knows she lies and sneaks things and dosnt do what she is told but I think he is so overwhelmed by the idea of dealing with her poor behavior that this is just easier.

I can't see us breaking up over her we are very much in love but I'm very quickly becoming indifferent to her and checking out of being invested in her in any way. Im am so disappointed because my two Daughters were so welcoming to her when they first moved in.

Rags's picture

Submitted by Rags on Fri, 05/19/2023 - 7:26am

Then rub daddy's nose in the stench perpetrated by  his failed family breeding experiement.

Lather... .rinse.... repeat.

Make eveyr evening footage review ith daddy.  

Get full common area cam coverage.

And locks, 

Lock every thing up. No access.  Once that happens, even her delusional daddy will not be able to buy into her crap.

I lknow that she is only 11yo.  However, end the problem.  No need to play her games.  Just win.

Whatever it takes.

Winterglow's picture

Submitted by Winterglow on Fri, 05/19/2023 - 7:46am

"he is so overwhelmed by the idea of dealing with her poor behavior that this is just easier"

In other words, he's a crap parent. It's his job to ensure she grows up to be a decent human being - how does he plan on doing that if he sticks his head in the sand all the time? Nobody said that being a parent would be easy ...

Survivingstephell's picture

Submitted by Survivingstephell on Fri, 05/19/2023 - 8:34am

In addition to the web cams, start playing her game with her. She leaves stuff out? Confiscate it and play dumb.   She needs to learn YOU are the alpha female in the home.  Men don't get it.  

Notthedoormat's picture

Submitted by Notthedoormat on Fri, 05/19/2023 - 9:03am

Our home security system includes interior cameras in common areas. Similar blink cameras can be bought on Amazon inexpensively.  If your DH doesn't want cameras, get a nanny cam device and tell him you did it to prove to yourself you're not crazy and also needed to share reality with him.

Get small portable safes to lock your belongings in...makeup, jewelry,  whatever so she knows you're on to her and refus to play.

She will learn her place is as a child...not an adult and not the woman of the house.   If it's not brought under control it will likely get worse. 

I used to give more of the benefit of the doubt,  but was burned too many times.  Don't do it.