OT - Does this happen to everyone?
BF and I are in a rut. We love each other very much and definitely want to be together but we've settled into this routine and I don't feel like we're connecting romantically at all. I know that things settle in after you've been together for a long time but I'd like to get back to the "crazy in love" feeling a little bit. This is probably TMI but we used to be all over each other constantly and lately I don't really have an interest in that. I think part of it is that I'm very much ready to get married but he has some issues with trusting himself after being with BM and he feels like he's got a clock over his head to ask me to marry him. I keep telling him that I'd like for the two of us to go away for a weekend together but money's really tight so we can't do that but there's got to be something we can do. Do you guys have advice for things that I can do to get bring the romance back?
Have you read the book "The
Have you read the book "The Love Dare"? It's based on the movie Fireproof.
I've heard of couples who have read this book together and has completely changed their relationship for the better. Here's the link
http://thelovedarebook.com/
___________________________________________________________________________
“The challenge is to help couples turn "I Do" into "We Can."
You aren't alone, lol. "If
You aren't alone, lol.
"If I turn into another, Dig me up from under what is covering the better part of me" -Incubus
ok, this might sound really
ok, this might sound really silly...
When DH and I were together for about 3 years, we needed a vacation but couldn't afford one. So I setup a destination vacation right in our living room. I made palm trees out of construction paper, got out some beach towels and sunglasses, etc. Then DH came home to me "sunbathing" in my bikini (did I mention this was before we had kids living with us? lol). We had a sexy hot vacation weekend without spending a dime.
What a fab idea! I commend
What a fab idea! I commend your imagination!! And I may have to steal your idea one day
Totally not alone. FH and I
Totally not alone. FH and I had the SAME EXACT conversation last night and this morning.
Its almost like I just blogged my situation as well. Trust me, you aren't alone!
And middlemom, I bought "The Love Dare" awhile ago and read bits and pieces of it. A couple of weeks ago, I got it back out and told FH to read through it. Think he did? Nope. Or if he did, he's illiterate and can't look at a book without pictures and get the hint!
I suggested last night that we get other books to help us. A friend of mine split with her hubby last year for a couple of months because they were having a rough patch.
Now, they're back together and just renewed their wedding vows. She said they have all kinds of books on intimacy and relationships that have really helped them. I'm all about reading, so bring on the books!
Maybe I can teach FH a thing or two about getting the "spark" back.
Wouldn't it be nice if they
Wouldn't it be nice if they were proactive and willing to look at things and read things that we ask them to? Mine just sits there and would rather let things go as they are as opposed to doing something about it. Lazy! I even handed him the article by Joel Schwartzberg from Stepmom magazine thinking he'd be like "Wow - is that what it's been like for you?" Oh no... he got this deer in the headlights look on his face and when I asked him what his thoughts were he said "None - you trapped me in a corner". God he pisses me off - no emotions whatsoever, unless it's pissed at me bc Princess was being a brat to me.
I got the book,
I got the book, "Stepmonster" and I know he was curious about it. I'd sit there and read it and he'd ask me what it was about. I'd tell him, You can read it when I'm done. That way you can understand how I feel sometimes.
Yeah right. If its not a fitness magazine, the pennysaver, SI or Playboy he ain't reading it.
Hopefully now that he's "seen the light" he'll start reading the crap I give him.